PDA

View Full Version : Teenager Dumped By Chatroom Girlfriend



Jebus
08-29-2005, 08:30 PM
I'm trying to figure out if this is real. Either way, Poor Joey...

CYBERSPACE-- Joey Passmore is alone. The 14-year-old Internet enthusiast recently lost his cyber-girlfriend and computer soul mate, LUV_U2, and he's not sure how to deal with the confusing new emotions that have begun to stir inside him.

"I don't understand," moped Joey. "I gave her my love, my devotion, and the IP's of some private FTP sites."

Joey had never met LUV_U2 in Real Life™. They met online almost two months ago, but were committed to each other after only a few short chat sessions over a two-week period.

"Something clicked right from the start," said Joey. "I admit, I found her choice of avatar sexually attractive, but there's more to her than just that. I would show up in the #lookN4love chat room on Undernet, and we would share the time together, while we did homework, watched 'Mad About You' repeats, and played PopCap games over the Net."

"I thought we had something special," continued Joey. "I would send her e-cards, and links to special poems that were written for people like us. I even photoshopped our avatars together on a Martian landscape--way romantic. But then that one evening, she came into the IRC channel and was really quiet. I knew something was wrong."

Joey has been unable to talk about his break-up with family members and has even considered selling his computer and joining the school volleyball team, just to get away from the intense emotional pain. At fourteen, break-ups are awkward to deal with. This was Joey's first romance and he believes his few friends at school would only laugh at him if he mentioned it to any of them.


"Those guys at school would only want to know how far I got, like did she send pictures of her tits, or something like that," said an angry Joey. "They wouldn't understand it was so much more than that."

His only source of closure has been a couple of Internet love forums that he has bookmarked on his web browser.

"I posted a message on a message board for heartbroken individuals who were recently dumped," said Joey, sobbing quietly. "But the only response was from some joker who asked how I knew it wasn't a man I was dating. How cruel can you get?"

"We were at that stage in our relationship where we were almost ready to exchange ICQ numbers, a huge leap in commitment," said Joey, wiping his nose. "Someday I had hoped we could swap actual snail-mail addresses, maybe even a photo, and then, who knows after that? I guess she got scared. I don't understand."

Joey isn't sure he can trust cyberwomen anymore, and is afraid to reveal his true self online to another. He may find escape by interacting only with girls he knows from school, church, and his neighbourhood. But that would mean meeting them and Joey isn't ready for social encounters yet.

"I may never be able to cyberdate again," cried Joey. "I've been hurt once, and now I may never be able to use that same alias again."

Joey almost deleted the chat logs he had with LUV_U2 in a fit of anger. "I was hurt, and I wanted to hurt. But now, those lines of text are the only thing I have left to cherish," said Joey. "The smilicons we shared were special, but now I may never smilicon again."
http://www.thetoque.com/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=68&Itemid=29

TheUnholyNightbringer
08-29-2005, 08:35 PM
No way is that real. Funny though.

nieh
08-29-2005, 08:37 PM
Real Life™ *giggles*

TheUnholyNightbringer
08-29-2005, 08:39 PM
Haha, I love how The Sims is a real life simulator without all the bother of being real life.

While we're on the subject.

TheHulaChick
08-29-2005, 08:52 PM
Haha, I love how The Sims is a real life simulator without all the bother of being real life.

While we're on the subject.
Haha I was thinking that awhile ago. When I used to play the sims I'd be all 'woo look how awesome and poplular I am! hmm I should be like this in real life... nah to much effort'

RXP
08-30-2005, 01:28 AM
She fuckin blocked me.

Vladimir
08-30-2005, 01:37 AM
Haha, I love how The Sims is a real life simulator without all the bother of being real life.

While we're on the subject.
nah , the sims suck. i played it 3 days but then i was tired of it

Sunny
08-30-2005, 01:40 AM
She fuckin blocked me.

la la la la...

thanks for getting that song stuck in my head! :[

RXP
08-30-2005, 01:42 AM
Check this shizzle out (http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/flash/blockedme.php)

barangatang
08-30-2005, 01:45 AM
Check this shizzle out (http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/flash/blockedme.php)


Hahaha


Was that taken from a puddle of mud song?

Vladimir
08-30-2005, 01:50 AM
Check this shizzle out (http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/flash/blockedme.php)
LOL

1. The message you have entered is too short. Please lengthen your message to at least 10 characters.

platinumpt
08-30-2005, 02:50 AM
Yeah, She Hates Me. Cool song!

barangatang
08-30-2005, 03:13 AM
Yeah, She Hates Me. Cool song!

hmm, what happened to "puddle of mudd' anyway?

platinumpt
08-30-2005, 03:16 AM
hmm, what happened to "puddle of mudd' anyway?
Good question. They've been in Portugal a few years ago, but I don't know anymore of them since that time...

Jesus
08-30-2005, 03:17 AM
I'm trying to figure out if this is real. Either way, Poor Joey...


Didn't the huge banner with humour, parody and satire give it away?

barangatang
08-30-2005, 03:18 AM
Good question. They've been in Portugal a few years ago, but I don't know anymore of them since that time...

they've came out with millions of "enhanced" and "special edition" cds.

Its all crap.

platinumpt
08-30-2005, 03:20 AM
they've came out with millions of "enhanced" and "special edition" cds.

Its all crap.
Wow. It's hard to fall lower than that.

barangatang
08-30-2005, 03:26 AM
Wow. It's hard to fall lower than that.

Do you think they're even trying to make new music?

platinumpt
08-30-2005, 03:33 AM
Do you think they're even trying to make new music?
I hope so, as long as it's good music! I always enjoy listening to high quality songs!

RXP
08-30-2005, 03:36 AM
I like their first LP but hte second one was awful. Only one good song on there that was the single.

barangatang
08-30-2005, 03:37 AM
I hope so, as long as it's good music! I always enjoy listening to high quality songs!

Its been about 3 years since they've put out thier last album.

platinumpt
08-30-2005, 03:38 AM
WOW! Time rolls on, definitely...

Jebus
08-30-2005, 03:49 AM
Didn't the huge banner with humour, parody and satire give it away?
I realize it's fake butI still find it somewhat believable even with all that parody. Let's take the linda story for an example which I thought was a joke at first but it wasnt...

JoY
08-30-2005, 05:21 AM
hahahaha, this is fantastic. reminds me of a GREAT story, that was able to amuse me for months.

The_Hombre
08-30-2005, 08:23 AM
Haha :) That was a great parody. I had an internet "girlfriend" once, not the best thing that happened to me. Sometimes it works out, sometimes it doesn't *shrugs*.

Whatever the case, I wouldn't necessarily take the piss out of people who did have internet partners, as long as they know what they are getting themselves into.

Sin Studly
08-30-2005, 08:32 AM
Haha :) That was a great parody. I had an internet "girlfriend" once,

No you didn't, you had an internet crush who you were a total vagina for, sending her "poetry" and crying like a baby, until somebody from this BBS balled her and you left the board in tears, you fucking crybaby loser.

JohnnyNemesis
08-30-2005, 09:21 AM
I like getting handjobs through the Internet.

Sin Studly
08-30-2005, 09:26 AM
*greases palm up*

The_Hombre
08-30-2005, 09:38 AM
No you didn't, you had an internet crush who you were a total vagina for, sending her "poetry" and crying like a baby, until somebody from this BBS balled her and you left the board in tears, you fucking crybaby loser.

Damn, you got me again.

How does this guy keep doing it?

Sin Studly
08-30-2005, 09:48 AM
I remember the time she talked to you without letting her contempt show, and then you announced on the board that she was your "girlfriend". She was shocked and amused.

The_Hombre
08-30-2005, 10:07 AM
I remember the time she talked to you without letting her contempt show, and then you announced on the board that she was your "girlfriend". She was shocked and amused.

If it means anything, I'm shocked at myself that I went through that. I can't believe I was that dumb.

Sin Studly
08-30-2005, 10:19 AM
I can believe it.

Cause, y'know, you haven't really gotten any better.

The_Hombre
08-30-2005, 10:57 AM
I can believe it.

Cause, y'know, you haven't really gotten any better.


I've not tried it on with anyone on this board yet, since my return ....

Sin Studly
08-30-2005, 11:17 AM
But you're still pathetic, annoying, stupid and nobody likes you.

Sinister
08-30-2005, 02:50 PM
Dude Fuck off
who are you?

a spammer - but either a clever one, or one who knows how the boards work - he's just saying "lol (random character)" at everything so the posts aren't "exact duplicates of a post sent in the last five minutes" (something like that. know what I mean ?)

Sin Studly
08-30-2005, 02:53 PM
How clever of him to figure out how the boards work.

Cause y'know, I didn't realise it the first time I tried to make a "duplicate post" when the text popped up to TELL ME SO IN PLAIN FUCKING ENGLISH.

Sinister, you're an idiot. Promise never to breed.

Sinister
08-30-2005, 02:59 PM
Sinister, you're an idiot. Promise never to breed.

erm... how about I do what I want and you leave me the fuck alone ?

Sin Studly
08-30-2005, 03:02 PM
erm... how about I do what I want and you leave me the fuck alone ?

Because I don't want to leave you alone if you want to continue being dirt-stupid and overly emotional.

Sinister
08-30-2005, 03:04 PM
Because I don't want to leave you alone if you want to continue being dirt-stupid and overly emotional.

damn, that's the worst bullshit ever.
I'm not stupid no matter what anyone says.
And I don't have emotions. They're absolutely USELESS.