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View Full Version : Read Brits: Become an Honorary Non-Brit



wheelchairman
09-18-2005, 08:01 AM
So here's the deal. If you are British, reply here.

I will either grant you honorary Non-Britishness, or I will put you on my ignore list.

If you are really lucky, I'll make you an American.

Think of this as a sort of ethnic cleansing, but the good kind.

English-Idiot
09-18-2005, 08:02 AM
um ok I'm British.

Mentally_Challenged
09-18-2005, 08:04 AM
Mmm, me too. I honestly don't know why i'm doing this...

the_GoDdEsS
09-18-2005, 08:06 AM
Oh Per, I wish I were a Brit so you could discipline me. But then again I'm fine being a Slavic nigger.

I love this thread.

wheelchairman
09-18-2005, 08:06 AM
Okay this is difficult. I have no idea who you people are....

Alright, English_Idiot, I applaud your honest name, however after reviewing your posts, I'm afraid I'll have to ignore list you. you just don't have that je ne sais quoi that warrants honorary non-Britishness.

And Mentally_Challenged, another honest name. And yet I must do the same.

wheelchairman
09-18-2005, 08:08 AM
Oh Per, I wish I were a Brit so you could discipline me. But then again I'm fine being a Slavic nigger.

I love this thread.
I'm not sure whether I should tolerate your talking to me directly or not.

Nah of course I will. I give you honorary Danishness (and thus Aryan/alcoholism.) However, only honorary.

Vera
09-18-2005, 08:09 AM
I think it's awesome you're giving the Brits a chance. You're such a great person!

wheelchairman
09-18-2005, 08:10 AM
My good looks are only exceeded by the kindness of my heart.

the_GoDdEsS
09-18-2005, 08:11 AM
You make the nigger cheeks blush. Mange takk.

Tizzalicious
09-18-2005, 08:12 AM
You should let them type some more, so you can see what their typingskills are like.

And don't fool them into thinking it's cool to be an american.

wheelchairman
09-18-2005, 08:13 AM
Gudinde, jamen dog, det var så lidt. Du taler allerede de ariske sproger. (språker?)

wheelchairman
09-18-2005, 08:14 AM
You should let them type some more, so you can see what their typingskills are like.

And don't fool them into thinking it's cool to be an american.
I searched their old posts.

And it *is* cool to be American. Just look at Johnny, Mota Boy and I.

wheelchairman
09-18-2005, 08:20 AM
It's cooler to be Eurotrash. We have the least retards. You shouldn't show off your American side.
Nah Eurotrash people are retards who can't figure out how to make one cup of coffee.

wheelchairpwn3d?

Tizzalicious
09-18-2005, 08:21 AM
Nah Eurotrash people are retards who can't figure out how to make one cup of coffee.

wheelchairpwn3d?

Pffff. You can't even find a stove.

Err. Yes. pwn3d.

wheelchairman
09-18-2005, 08:22 AM
Pffff. You can't even find a stove.

Err. Yes. pwn3d.
Yet amazingly, I was the one cooking.

Tizzalicious
09-18-2005, 08:23 AM
Yet amazingly, I was the one cooking.

After I pointed out the "OMG it's so big" stove. And I believe that if it wasn't for me we all would have eaten raw chicken.

wheelchairman
09-18-2005, 08:29 AM
After I pointed out the "OMG it's so big" stove. And I believe that if it wasn't for me we all would have eaten raw chicken.
pff, I would've used the microwave.

Tizzalicious
09-18-2005, 08:30 AM
pff, I would've used the microwave.

Yes, and you would have cooked the chicken in the kettle.

<3

wheelchairman
09-18-2005, 08:33 AM
Yes, and you would have cooked the chicken in the kettle.

<3
Yes...do you know any other way to boil things?

Tizzalicious
09-18-2005, 08:34 AM
Yes...do you know any other way to boil things?

Yes, food you don't boil in a kettle!

Unless I lost my English.

But at least I can spell.

wheelchairman
09-18-2005, 08:36 AM
hmm again though, at least I can cook. I didn't see you making *me* any food, now did I?

Tizzalicious
09-18-2005, 08:38 AM
Pfff we cooked together.

And I won't cook if we don't have sex.

wheelchairman
09-18-2005, 08:38 AM
We cooked together? what exactly did you do?

Tizzalicious
09-18-2005, 08:41 AM
I don't remember. I told you the chicken was raw. And I found the pans. (AND THE STOVE!) and I was being an entertaining.

wheelchairman
09-18-2005, 08:42 AM
pff I would've found the stove. I just wasn't used to the complete lack of OVEN that usually goes with stoves.

and pans, pff what are you my butler?

Tizzalicious
09-18-2005, 08:45 AM
The stove was obvious though. You are just stupid.

Butler? WTF? I must be stupid and not understand an english pan thing :(

wheelchairman
09-18-2005, 08:55 AM
The stove was obvious though. You are just stupid.

Butler? WTF? I must be stupid and not understand an english pan thing :(
Pff, it was a new kitchen, new country, and I was under the influence of several things. not to mention I had like just woken up.

and Butler, because you got things for me, and generally acted like my servant. the way a woman should.

Tizzalicious
09-18-2005, 09:02 AM
You hadn't just woken up. It was evening.

And I didn't act like your servant. You wish. Bitch. You acted like mine, getting me water in the morning.

wheelchairman
09-18-2005, 09:07 AM
You hadn't just woken up. It was evening.

And I didn't act like your servant. You wish. Bitch. You acted like mine, getting me water in the morning.
I think I napped most of that day.

and pff. I was just being a gentlemen. It would've been servant-like if you *asked* me to get you water, and not the otherway around.

Tizzalicious
09-18-2005, 09:08 AM
Oh yes. That's the word now. Gentleman. Nah <3 It was sweet.

~*hit_that*~
09-18-2005, 09:33 AM
I'm British.....


(And happy being that way, ish)

wheelchairman
09-18-2005, 09:42 AM
This message is hidden because ~*hit_that*~ is on your ignore list.

It's way too late for you little one.

Thucydides
09-18-2005, 09:49 AM
I am, of course, British. And proud to be British. :cool:

Vera
09-18-2005, 10:02 AM
*cough* Jew. *cough*

wheelchairman
09-18-2005, 10:11 AM
I am, of course, British. And proud to be British. :cool:
hahhaha, sure you are polish jew. *ignore listed*

Thucydides
09-18-2005, 10:14 AM
hahahahahha commie bastard.

yeah jew, whatever.

wheelchairman
09-18-2005, 10:20 AM
Why bother?
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v220/wheelchairman/wheelchairpwn3d.jpg

Sin Studly
09-18-2005, 10:23 AM
I don't approve of this mass-honourary aryan status shit.

Simona is not a Dane, and never will be. She's a non-Aryan slavic nigger. Furthermore she's my non-Aryan slavic nigger.

I've given honourary Aryan status to one person, and endorsed honourary non-Brit status of one other. I beg that honourary stati be given out sparingly.

wheelchairman
09-18-2005, 10:28 AM
I don't approve of this mass-honourary aryan status shit.

Simona is not a Dane, and never will be. She's a non-Aryan slavic nigger. Furthermore she's my non-Aryan slavic nigger.

I've given honourary Aryan status to one person, and endorsed honourary non-Brit status of one other. I beg that honourary stati be given out sparingly.
I've only spared one person, that being Simona.

However *you* are Australian. The direct descendent of the dregs of old British society. I think you have a lot of...work to do, if you want my forgiveness.

Sin Studly
09-18-2005, 10:31 AM
Your forgiveness is meaningless to me. Your apology is required, however, unless you want to get raped without lube and shanked in the stomach.

And Simona is a nigger. MY nigger. Not no filthy Dane.

Tizzalicious
09-18-2005, 10:33 AM
SimonaisMYnigger.

wheelchairman
09-18-2005, 10:35 AM
Your forgiveness is meaningless to me. Your apology is required, however, unless you want to get raped without lube and shanked in the stomach.

And Simona is a nigger. MY nigger. Not no filthy Dane.
Simona can be your Dane now. Although I think she's Norwegian.

Sin Studly
09-18-2005, 10:45 AM
She's a slavic nigger! No pure nordic blood. She's my nigger!

wheelchairman
09-18-2005, 10:48 AM
Hey man, she bothered to learn the language.

Let's make a compromise. She can be one of those indvandre (immigrant danes), tolerated by Danish society, hated and abused by nationalists.

Sin Studly
09-18-2005, 10:49 AM
NO! She's pure nigger.

the_GoDdEsS
09-18-2005, 10:50 AM
I serve my Aryan master.

Tizzalicious
09-18-2005, 10:50 AM
I serve my Aryan master.

Of course you are talking about me, right?

wheelchairman
09-18-2005, 10:53 AM
Pff tizz, you got brown eyes.

Tizzalicious
09-18-2005, 10:56 AM
I don't care.

I'm Aryan.

TheUnholyNightbringer
09-18-2005, 11:04 AM
Mwhaha, I'm already a non-Brit. I'm so hardk0re.

But I need to be reassured by Per. :(

Sunny
09-18-2005, 11:06 AM
I serve my Aryan master.

your master is my beetch. bahahah.

my cute fluffy aussie nigger beetch!

wheelchairman
09-18-2005, 11:06 AM
Yes Dave. You are one of the people reserved for honorary Non-Britishness. Besides you are drinking aryan vodka. Nothing but the finest.

TheUnholyNightbringer
09-18-2005, 11:06 AM
Yes Dave. You are one of the people reserved for honorary Non-Britishness. Besides you are drinking aryan vodka. Nothing but the finest.

Absolut-ly.

Lolz, punz.

wheelchairman
09-18-2005, 11:08 AM
Absolut-ly.

Lolz, punz.
Don't make me change my mind.

P.S. Drop that stuff and drink Danzka.

TheUnholyNightbringer
09-18-2005, 11:10 AM
Don't make me change my mind.

P.S. Drop that stuff and drink Danzka.

You can't change your mind, biatch. I've decided I'm Dutch and I WILL come and kick your ass while spouting some of my crazy language.

Kidding. Knuf.

And I will not drop Absolut. I like it.

Vera
09-18-2005, 11:10 AM
Your milk bottle looks so cute in that picture, David.

wheelchairman
09-18-2005, 11:12 AM
You can't change your mind, biatch. I've decided I'm Dutch and I WILL come and kick your ass while spouting some of my crazy language.

Kidding. Knuf.

And I will not drop Absolut. I like it.
Did you just try and hug me in Dutch? Don't or you will get piemel in je kont, and it will be niet rar.

Danzka is better. Absolut tastes like sewer water in comparison.

TheUnholyNightbringer
09-18-2005, 11:12 AM
Your milk bottle looks so cute in that picture, David.

Vera hurts my feelin's. :(


Did you just try and hug me in Dutch? Don't or you will get piemel in je kont, and it will be niet rar.

Why yes, yes I did. But I believe a Dutch hug is the same as any other hug. Just has an undertone of crazee language.

Absolut is good. I will listen to no more.

Sin Studly
09-18-2005, 11:14 AM
Absolut is shit. Russkaya. Imported from the Ukraine. Drink it.

wheelchairman
09-18-2005, 11:15 AM
Why yes, yes I did. But I believe a Dutch hug is the same as any other hug. Just has an undertone of crazee language.

Absolut is good. I will listen to no more.
Try Danzka. Just once. Don't make me come over there.

TheUnholyNightbringer
09-18-2005, 11:17 AM
Try Danzka. Just once. Don't make me come over there.

And do what? =P

the_GoDdEsS
09-18-2005, 11:19 AM
your master is my beetch. bahahah.

my cute fluffy aussie nigger beetch!

That usually changes when I get to crack my whip and overpower him like a barbaric nigger. No Aryan will escape the sharp claws of the Mistress.

wheelchairman
09-18-2005, 11:20 AM
And do what? =P
And make me commit several acts of child abuse with alcohol.

Ugh but I could never go near Heathrow.

Sin Studly
09-18-2005, 11:21 AM
Can't you slavic mistresses share me?

Tizzalicious
09-18-2005, 11:21 AM
You can't change your mind, biatch. I've decided I'm Dutch and I WILL come and kick your ass while spouting some of my crazy language.

Kidding. Knuf.

And I will not drop Absolut. I like it.

OMG!! HEARTZ!!!!


Why yes, yes I did. But I believe a Dutch hug is the same as any other hug. Just has an undertone of crazee language.

Dutch hugs outrule all other hugs. Anyone who met me should know that.

wheelchairman
09-18-2005, 11:22 AM
Nah..they are alright. Not great, but alright.

TheUnholyNightbringer
09-18-2005, 11:22 AM
OMG!! HEARTZ!!!!

Heartz indeed.


Dutch hugs outrule all other hugs. Anyone who met me should know that.

Does that mean my hugs rawk now, considering I'm Dutch?

Uber-Knufs, as it were.

Sin Studly
09-18-2005, 11:23 AM
DRINK RUSSKAYA, BITCH!

Seriously, Absolut is worse than Smirnoff Red.

Tizzalicious
09-18-2005, 11:24 AM
Heartz indeed.



Does that mean my hugs rawk now, considering I'm Dutch?

Uber-Knufs, as it were.

Uber-knufs? That's like half German, which makes them not so good. But okay, your hugs rule.

And Per, you lie.

Also, Danish hugs are even better. I mean. Knus. OMFG.

wheelchairman
09-18-2005, 11:24 AM
DRINK RUSSKAYA, BITCH!

Seriously, Absolut is worse than Smirnoff Red.
Quoted for Truth.

Most of the money made by the Absolut company goes to their crappy advertisements.

Stolichnaya is also a good way to go, if we're talking Eastern European vodkas.

TheUnholyNightbringer
09-18-2005, 11:25 AM
DRINK RUSSKAYA, BITCH!

Seriously, Absolut is worse than Smirnoff Red.

I will drink it if I can get a hold of it. And Danzka. I promise.

Vera
09-18-2005, 11:25 AM
Vera hurts my feelin's. :(
Hahahahah, I'm so awesome when I'm mean.

T-6005
09-18-2005, 11:27 AM
I'm a whiskey drinker.

So the arguments on which vodka is best are long bits of filler.

And ABBA kicks ass.

Sin Studly
09-18-2005, 11:34 AM
I just drank an entire 700ml bottle of водка руcская and half a 500ml bottle of Spirytus Rektyfikowany, and I'm typing without utilising the backspace function.

Can I be an honourary slav?

wheelchairman
09-18-2005, 11:35 AM
I'm a whiskey drinker.

So the arguments on which vodka is best are long bits of filler.

And ABBA kicks ass.
ABBA rocks.

If you don't like the following whisky's I will ignore list you.

Ballantines
Kennedy's Whiskey
Tullamore Dew
Bush Mills.

<<Angry Kid>>
09-18-2005, 11:35 AM
No way!! I don't wanna be an American! I wanna be in that country that bloke is building on that programme 'how to build your own country'. :D
Don't know whether that shows in America...
By the way is it true that you Americans think Tony Blairs cute? :eek:

Sin Studly
09-18-2005, 11:37 AM
I haven't tried any of those whiskeys.

I like Wild Turkey and Jack Daniels, as far as bourbon goes. Famous Grouse, Black Douglas, Johnny Walker Black (or Blue) for scotch. And Canadian Club and Jamesons for "other".

the_GoDdEsS
09-18-2005, 11:38 AM
Can I be an honourary slav?

You certainly display the most necessary qualities of a Slav. Honourary Slavicity granted.

wheelchairman
09-18-2005, 11:38 AM
The Brits who can't speak English understandably are ignore-listed without chance of parole.

T-6005
09-18-2005, 11:38 AM
ABBA rocks.

If you don't like the following whisky's I will ignore list you.

Ballantines
Kennedy's Whiskey
Tullamore Dew
Bush Mills.

BushMills does it.

Although I'll admit a Jack Daniels weakness as well. Very strange tasting alcohol though it is.

Sin Studly
09-18-2005, 11:39 AM
You certainly display the most necessary qualities of a Slav. Honourary Slavicity granted.

This is the proudest moment of my life... I'd like to thank the academy, etc.

wheelchairman
09-18-2005, 11:42 AM
BushMills does it.

Although I'll admit a Jack Daniels weakness as well. Very strange tasting alcohol though it is.
Jack Daniels is the sell-out whisky.

T-6005
09-18-2005, 11:43 AM
I'll admit that. I like it nonetheless.

the_GoDdEsS
09-18-2005, 11:45 AM
This is the proudest moment of my life... I'd like to thank the academy, etc.

You're welcome for further education and being awarded a Diploma in Slavicity. You know what that means...

Sin Studly
09-18-2005, 11:54 AM
Kinky brutal violent sex?

Me don't wanna!

*cries*

the_GoDdEsS
09-18-2005, 11:58 AM
*cracks whip and stomps boots*

If you want your diploma...

T-6005
09-18-2005, 11:59 AM
I can't watch....

Sin Studly
09-18-2005, 12:13 PM
*sobs*

Is there no form of alternative schooling? Eating swans? Going on welfare?

the_GoDdEsS
09-18-2005, 12:20 PM
Eating swans? *blinks*

I'm afraid not. Don't expect mercy either.

Plus, there's still Easter for your revenge. I'm all accessible.

Just a Girl
09-18-2005, 12:42 PM
i'm British.

and surprisingly nervous now. hmm.

T-6005
09-18-2005, 01:16 PM
Not to mention apparently WAY too late.

~*hit_that*~
09-18-2005, 01:19 PM
This message is hidden because ~*hit_that*~ is on your ignore list.

It's way too late for you little one.

YAY =D

*dances*

Megs
09-18-2005, 01:38 PM
wow. i'm british, but i'm already on his ignore list anyway...i think

Tizzalicious
09-18-2005, 02:43 PM
The British truly do suck. I'm gonna stick with only aryan men.

T-6005
09-18-2005, 02:48 PM
Being a man, people sucking is no letdown.

Conspiracy of One
09-18-2005, 02:50 PM
Im from england *lies*

Izie
09-18-2005, 02:52 PM
I'm a Slav. And I'd like to stay that way, sorry Per :p

the_GoDdEsS
09-18-2005, 02:54 PM
AHAHAHAHA. Per, you're such an Ivil ass. Hahaha.

Izie
09-18-2005, 02:56 PM
Bahahahahahahaha

<3 Per

Tizzalicious
09-18-2005, 03:03 PM
hahahah Per is hilarious. <3333

And Brits, seriously, quit being so fucking dumb/ugly/incompetent.

Izie
09-18-2005, 03:05 PM
Editing posts like that is confusing. :/

TheUnholyNightbringer
09-18-2005, 03:06 PM
And Brits, seriously, quit being so fucking dumb/ugly/incompetent.

Not all of us/them are.

T-6005
09-18-2005, 03:07 PM
I like how everyone on here can come together in complete harmony and equality to share their opinions, with everyone being treated equitably by all other parties.

Fuck the English. Stupid poms.

Tizzalicious
09-18-2005, 03:11 PM
Not all of us/them are.
wtf you ain't british?

TheUnholyNightbringer
09-18-2005, 03:12 PM
wtf you ain't british?

Declared an honourary non-Brit. Keep up.

The Talking Pie
09-18-2005, 03:36 PM
Cleanse me! For the love of God cleanse me! With soapy water. Rowr. No matter what I do I just can't stop being British. I feel so dirty.

sitdyneshelagh
09-18-2005, 03:39 PM
You'll have to put me on your ignore list anyway, I was, after all, independentmobilityscooterwoman all those years ago.

Tizzalicious
09-18-2005, 04:04 PM
You'll have to put me on your ignore list anyway, I was, after all, independentmobilityscooterwoman all those years ago.
WCM told me that he <3s you and wants to chat with you again.

wheelchairman
09-18-2005, 04:36 PM
Alright

Just A Girl, I've never talked to you. But you seem alright. I give you honorary non-britishness

Megs is already ignore listed. As is Conspiracy of One.

The Talking Pie, I like you enough to give you honorary Americanness.

independentmobilityscooterwoman, haha I missed our chats and was sorry I had offended you into thinking that I blocked you on purpose, like how long ago was that, two years ago, 3? a year? anyways I give you honorary americanness too.

And it's disappointing so few have replied. Although encouraging that I've ignorelisted so many brits beforehand.