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the_GoDdEsS
10-29-2005, 05:01 AM
http://www.beliefnet.com/story/84/story_8476_1.html


Oh noez! Check all the religions.

The Catholic Church views masturbation as "an intrinsically and gravely disordered action."

What a bad disorder.

Tizzalicious
10-29-2005, 05:04 AM
That's pretty depressing :(

The_Hombre
10-29-2005, 05:04 AM
The Catholic Church views masturbation as "an intrinsically and gravely disordered action."


You are how old now?

Tizzalicious
10-29-2005, 05:05 AM
You are how old now?

Eh?

23 year olds can't masturbate?

JoY
10-29-2005, 05:06 AM
You are how old now?
what does that have to do with anything?

& YES, I'm baptised a liberal protestant. awesome. *goes off to masturbate*

Tizzalicious
10-29-2005, 05:06 AM
There's an age-limit to maturbating :( Oh noez.

The_Hombre
10-29-2005, 05:09 AM
Eh?

23 year olds can't masturbate?

Yes. That is exactly what I meant.

Sin Studly
10-29-2005, 06:22 AM
Nobody will ever like you, Ste.

The_Hombre
10-29-2005, 07:06 AM
Nobody will ever like you, Ste.

After I post this I'm going to slit my wrists :(

TheUnholyNightbringer
10-29-2005, 08:10 AM
I'm not gonna masturbate 'till I'm married.

EDIT: Expanding on this, I refuse to believe that no Pope has ever whacked off. No wonder he looks so old. He's really 26, you know.

The_Hombre
10-29-2005, 08:28 AM
I refuse to believe that no Pope has ever whacked off. No wonder he looks so old. He's really 26, you know.

I never knew that the Pope's masturbation rituals weighed so heavily on your mind...

TheUnholyNightbringer
10-29-2005, 08:28 AM
"Rituals"? Masturbation is a "ritual" to you? Do you slaughter a goat, Ste?

0r4ng3
10-29-2005, 08:32 AM
Slaughter a goat sounds like another metaphor, or whatever you call it. Like, if someone says "I'm gonna go slaugter the goat, I'll be back in 2 minutes".

The_Hombre
10-29-2005, 08:33 AM
"Rituals"? Masturbation is a "ritual" to you? Do you slaughter a goat, Ste?

I slaughter a goat and then masturbate over it's rotting corpse. Atop a hill.

original_prankster
10-29-2005, 09:38 AM
Hm. Masturbation is...well...natural. EVERYONE IN THE ENTIRE WORLD will be going to Hell, I guess. :rolleyes:

Tizzalicious
10-29-2005, 09:40 AM
Hm. Masturbation is...well...natural. EVERYONE IN THE ENTIRE WORLD will be going to Hell, I guess. :rolleyes:

Are you serious?

0r4ng3
10-29-2005, 09:41 AM
Let's face it, everyone's going to hell for something or other.

Kitten
10-29-2005, 09:42 AM
Hm. Masturbation is...well...natural. EVERYONE IN THE ENTIRE WORLD will be going to Hell, I guess. :rolleyes:

Some people are so scared of religion, they wont be going to hell. Too prudish or religious to even find out what they like. So while hell will be pretty full, heaven will have a few too.

the_GoDdEsS
10-29-2005, 10:02 AM
Some people are so scared of religion, they wont be going to hell. Too prudish or religious to even find out what they like. So while hell will be pretty full, heaven will have a few too.

I generally agree. Religion generates fear.

And not ALL the people masturbate. I know one chick who's never done it before.

Oh and you know what's sick? That as a Catholic you're actually supposed to confess it to the priest.

memento
10-29-2005, 10:14 AM
What a pussy needing lotion.

original_prankster
10-29-2005, 10:14 AM
And not ALL the people masturbate. I know one chick who's never done it before.

I know. I was just exaggerating a bit.

But still. 90% of the people in the world will be going to Hell. =p

the_GoDdEsS
10-29-2005, 10:25 AM
HAhahaha, Lazar!

Vera
10-29-2005, 11:03 AM
*mischevious smile*
What a complete and utter surprise.

Vera
10-29-2005, 11:16 AM
That you jerk off to the BBS.

I hate it when people make me explain my lame jokes to them, thus making them even lamer.

Fuck you, Tony.

[Warning] Nimrod In Town
10-29-2005, 11:21 AM
Let's face it, everyone's going to hell for something or other.

Not if you accept Jesus as your savior, and repent your sins.

Oh, and you're not Atheist. Atheist don't believe in Hell, nor Heaven. Idiot.

Most conservative Christians do not condone masturbation, although masturbation is not explicitly mentioned in the Bible. Christians often conclude that masturbation itself is not a sin, but it is often related to lust, which many Christians believe is sinful. For candid teen talk about masturbation, see this About.com article.

0r4ng3
10-29-2005, 11:22 AM
I don't believe in it. I'm just saying that according to Religious standards, about 99% of the population is going to hell. It's possible to be knowledgable about religion, and still not believe it.

wheelchairman
10-29-2005, 11:24 AM
Who's Tony?




;)
If I didn't see that smiley I would've gone totally apeshit on you.

HeadAroundU
10-29-2005, 11:25 AM
The world is one big hell!

arak0r
10-29-2005, 11:47 AM
who cares what they say is a sin, you can always just go to church, repent, and all your sins go bye bye :rolleyes:

protestants are the nasty ones. at least the white protestants in this country have been responsible for alot of bullshit.

Jebus
10-29-2005, 11:50 AM
*mischevious smile*
http://tinypic.com/f2v4n6.jpg
wait, you don't need lotion for your uncircumcised penis.

TheUnholyNightbringer
10-29-2005, 11:51 AM
Uncircumcised > Circumcised

Vera
10-29-2005, 11:55 AM
Uncircumcised > Circumcised
Shut up, Britfag.

TheUnholyNightbringer
10-29-2005, 11:56 AM
I stand firm on my position on penises. Britfag or otherwise.

Paint_It_Black
10-29-2005, 11:57 AM
Slaughter a goat sounds like another metaphor, or whatever you call it. Like, if someone says "I'm gonna go slaugter the goat, I'll be back in 2 minutes".

This deserves a second viewing.

Original prankstA
10-29-2005, 01:07 PM
http://www.beliefnet.com/story/84/story_8476_1.html


Oh noez! Check all the religions.

The Catholic Church views masturbation as "an intrinsically and gravely disordered action."

What a bad disorder.
thank the lord! (im safe)

0r4ng3
10-29-2005, 01:08 PM
OP, you're telling me you've never slaugtered the goat before? I find that hard to believe of anyone here.

Original prankstA
10-29-2005, 01:09 PM
OP, you're telling me you've never slaugtered the goat before? I find that hard to believe of anyone here.
no its ok in my religion

Original prankstA
10-29-2005, 01:10 PM
OP, you're telling me you've never slaugtered the goat before? I find that hard to believe of anyone here.
at first i thought you were surious about killing a goat

0r4ng3
10-29-2005, 01:10 PM
Oh, that makes more sense. You kinda threw me off when you said "thank the lord" in your post.

Edit: It's slaughter the goat, not kill.

Original prankstA
10-29-2005, 01:23 PM
Oh, that makes more sense. You kinda threw me off when you said "thank the lord" in your post.

Edit: It's slaughter the goat, not kill.
ino ino but i thought you were saying that ive never killed a goat, meaning make it die....not jerk it

.:SMASH:.
10-29-2005, 01:27 PM
I'm not gonna masturbate 'till I'm married.

EDIT: Expanding on this, I refuse to believe that no Pope has ever whacked off. No wonder he looks so old. He's really 26, you know.
you haven't lived untill you've had a whack...the pope is just jealous he cant get grasp of his microscopic penis

Sunny
10-29-2005, 01:38 PM
I stand firm on my position on penises.

...
...firm?

=p

Jebus
10-29-2005, 10:34 PM
For the people who have a circumcised penis:
http://www.4restore.com/

Sunny
10-29-2005, 10:53 PM
ew. bullshit. i actually got to compare the circumsized penis sex to uncircumsized penis sex.... and the former is superior. so the whole "better lovemaking" thing is crap. ;p

not to mention circumsized penises look a lot sexier. the shar-pei dog look doesn't do it for me.

Jebus
10-30-2005, 12:14 AM
ew. bullshit. i actually got to compare the circumsized penis sex to uncircumsized penis sex.... and the former is superior. so the whole "better lovemaking" thing is crap.
It probably had to do more with the partner's skill than the penis in that case. It shouldn't make that much of a difference anyways...

Alec
10-30-2005, 01:41 AM
Check all the religions.
Damn it, ther's no pyrotecnism!

wheelchairman
10-30-2005, 04:04 AM
Yeah cause Sunny definitely think foreskin is the secret to pleasure. That sexually naive girl.

Seriously people, just because we're talking about penises there is no reason to get your panties in a bunch.

memento
10-30-2005, 04:07 AM
ew. bullshit. i actually got to compare the circumsized penis sex to uncircumsized penis sex.... and the former is superior. so the whole "better lovemaking" thing is crap. ;p


Or maybe the guy with the skin is shit in bed and the guy who's cut is awesome in bed :-p.

Sin Studly
10-30-2005, 04:13 AM
ew. bullshit. i actually got to compare the circumsized penis sex to uncircumsized penis sex.... and the former is superior. so the whole "better lovemaking" thing is crap. ;p

not to mention circumsized penises look a lot sexier. the shar-pei dog look doesn't do it for me.

*cries pitifully*

I TRIED MY BEST, YOU CUNT!