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View Full Version : Think your smart? Five Questions



Duracell
11-04-2005, 02:56 PM
Here's your chance to prove that your not a moron.

1. Tony, driving under the influence of crack, lost control of his SUV and crashed directly inot another vehicle. The other driver was injured, treated, and released form the hospital. However, his passenger was dead. Tony was eventually charged, arrested and found guilty of reckless driving and driving while under the influence. He was not charged with criminal homicide. Why?


2. A faggot went into the woods and got it. He sat down and looked at it. After trying for a while, he determined that he couldn't get it. He then walked his faggot ass out of the woods with it. What is it?


3. Four lesbians left for a vacation in the high mountains in Switzerland. They were all eventually found dead in a cabin. How did they die?


4. Henry, the nightwatchman for a business, was telling the police, "I had a dream the other night about someone breaking into our building, and sure enough, it all came true!" Henry's boss, overhearing the conversation, immediately went and made out a final check for Henry, then promptly fired him. Why?


5. One evening, a young playa' took his gurlfriend to the movies. This bitch gave him some great head, while they watched. But then during the movie he killed her, and was then able to get her body out of the theatre without anyone suspecting anything being wrong. How was he able to accomplish this?

That_Guy91
11-04-2005, 03:04 PM
Here's your chance to prove that your not a moron.

1. Tony, driving under the influence of crack, lost control of his SUV and crashed directly inot another vehicle. The other driver was injured, treated, and released form the hospital. However, his passenger was dead. Tony was eventually charged, arrested and found guilty of reckless driving and driving while under the influence. He was not charged with criminal homicide. Why?
i think the passenger was already dead. maybe he od'd on cocaine.


4. Henry, the nightwatchman for a business, was telling the police, "I had a dream the other night about someone breaking into our building, and sure enough, it all came true!" Henry's boss, overhearing the conversation, immediately went and made out a final check for Henry, then promptly fired him. Why?
he wasnt dreaming. he was half asleep and it really happened.

memento
11-04-2005, 03:10 PM
1. Tony, driving under the influence of crack, lost control of his SUV and crashed directly inot another vehicle. The other driver was injured, treated, and released form the hospital. However, his passenger was dead. Tony was eventually charged, arrested and found guilty of reckless driving and driving while under the influence. He was not charged with criminal homicide. Why?

What country are we talking? What jurisdiction?

In England and Wales it's no homicide becuase there is a lack of malice aforethought. It would be charged as causing death by dangerous driving as defined in the Road Traffic Act 1991 s.30.

Mota Boy
11-04-2005, 03:11 PM
3 - They were found in the cabin of their plane, which had crashed.

4 - Tony was a night watchmen and should not have been sleeping at all the previous night, when he was on duty.

5 - His girlfriend was in a wheelchair.

Duracell
11-04-2005, 03:12 PM
I will post the anwsers later tonight!

Rag Doll
11-04-2005, 03:16 PM
1. Tony crashed in to a hearse. The "passenger" was dead before the accident.

XYlophonetreeZ
11-04-2005, 03:16 PM
2. An erection.

That_Guy91
11-04-2005, 03:17 PM
4 - Tony was a night watchmen and should not have been sleeping at all the previous night, when he was on duty.
now i feel stupid.

memento
11-04-2005, 03:19 PM
There's too many answers for 1.

Officer Counterfit
11-04-2005, 04:32 PM
i didnt feel like reading the questions

the_offsprings_monkey
11-04-2005, 04:35 PM
i didnt feel like reading the questions
That why fucking post, :mad: stupid n00b.

0r4ng3
11-04-2005, 04:35 PM
The only one without a correct answer is 2. He got a splinter in his foot.

Officer Counterfit
11-04-2005, 04:37 PM
That why fucking post, :mad: stupid n00b.
sorry, you dont have to get mad because im new here

the_offsprings_monkey
11-04-2005, 04:38 PM
sorry, you dont have to get mad because im new here
It's not that I'm mad because you're new here, it's because you're new and acting like an idiot.

0r4ng3
11-04-2005, 04:39 PM
It's not that I'm mad because you're new here, it's because you're new and acting like an idiot.
So what? You're well past new, and still you act like an idiot.

the_offsprings_monkey
11-04-2005, 04:41 PM
So what? You're well past new, and still you act like an idiot.
Yea but I don't want to hate myself.

Officer Counterfit
11-04-2005, 04:43 PM
So what? You're well past new, and still you act like an idiot.
thanks for sticking up for me

the_offsprings_monkey
11-04-2005, 04:45 PM
thanks for sticking up for me
He wasn't, he was just making a point that I'm an idiot, you idiot.

btw you spelt Counterfeit wrong in your name.

Officer Counterfit
11-04-2005, 04:46 PM
He wasn't, he was just making a point that I'm an idiot, you idiot.

btw you spelt Counterfeit wrong in your name.
your right, my bad

the_offsprings_monkey
11-04-2005, 04:47 PM
your right, my bad
You admit your mistake and didn't argue that you wanted it that way. I like you.

Offspring-Fanatic
11-04-2005, 04:48 PM
btw you spelt Counterfeit wrong in your name.

nice one....

Officer Counterfit
11-04-2005, 04:49 PM
and i realize i spelt counterfeit incorrecty, it's not the end of the world

Offspring-Fanatic
11-04-2005, 04:49 PM
You admit your mistake and didn't argue that you wanted it that way. I like you.


oh great is it going to be a hugfest now? :(

the_offsprings_monkey
11-04-2005, 04:50 PM
oh great is it going to be a hugfest now? :(
NAHHHHHHH I don't go in for the whole cock in ass gig, that is unless you wanna little boom boom fun time ;)

Offspring-Fanatic
11-04-2005, 04:50 PM
and i realize i spelt counterfeit incorrecty, it's not the end of the world

but its not just a minor post, its your display name and that is just a wee bit more important

Offspring-Fanatic
11-04-2005, 04:51 PM
NAHHHHHHH I don't go in for the whole cock in ass gig, that is unless you wanna little boom boom fun time ;)


no no not really

Original prankstA
11-04-2005, 04:52 PM
o-f your getting on my nerves...dont be mean to the n00b

coke_a_holic
11-04-2005, 04:52 PM
You people really know how to fuck a thread up. It was made by Duracell and you still managed to throw it off-topic. Nice.

the_offsprings_monkey
11-04-2005, 04:57 PM
o-f your getting on my nerves...dont be mean to the n00b
Who's being mean, I'm now being nice to the n00b

Offspring-Fanatic
11-04-2005, 05:04 PM
o-f your getting on my nerves...dont be mean to the n00b


but im not being all that mean... :( im actually gradually nice today...i was just saying "nice one" about catching the spelling and sticking it to him....

the_offsprings_monkey
11-04-2005, 05:05 PM
but im not being all that mean... :( im actually gradually nice today...i was just saying "nice one" about catching the spelling and sticking it to him....
WAHOO!! who's da man with da plan, sticking it to da MAN.

Offspring-Fanatic
11-04-2005, 05:11 PM
lol........ah crazy times crazy times

Human
11-04-2005, 05:12 PM
WAHOO!! who's da man with da plan, sticking it to da MAN.
You...erm...I guess...

the_offsprings_monkey
11-04-2005, 05:13 PM
You...erm...I guess...
Damm str8 gangsta.

Original prankstA
11-04-2005, 05:15 PM
Who's being mean, I'm now being nice to the n00b
offspring-fanatic was

Offspring-Fanatic
11-04-2005, 05:17 PM
offspring-fanatic was

well no one else is really o-f and keyword: was

but if you read earlier i explained what i mean so go back and read it and hopefully your mind will be changed. or else ill really get pissy

Officer Counterfit
11-04-2005, 05:22 PM
well no one else is really o-f and keyword: was

but if you read earlier i explained what i mean so go back and read it and hopefully your mind will be changed. or else ill really get pissy
offsprings monkey was asking op who he was reffering to

Offspring-Fanatic
11-04-2005, 05:24 PM
okay.......i get confused easily

Linda
11-04-2005, 05:32 PM
What country are we talking? What jurisdiction?

In England and Wales it's no homicide becuase there is a lack of malice aforethought. It would be charged as causing death by dangerous driving as defined in the Road Traffic Act 1991 s.30.

In the U.S., it would be considered vehicular manslaughter, but I like Rag Doll's answer the best!

Offspring-Fanatic
11-04-2005, 05:34 PM
In the U.S., it would be considered vehicular manslaughter, but I like Rag Doll's answer the best!


lol she's trying to fix us! (to get us back on topic..)

0r4ng3
11-04-2005, 05:35 PM
Yeah, I think Rag Doll was right on that one. The country is irrelevant. You can't kill a dead person, which is why he's not convicted for manslaughter.

Linda
11-04-2005, 05:44 PM
lol she's trying to fix us! (to get us back on topic..)

You do get confused easily, don't you.

Offspring-Fanatic
11-04-2005, 05:46 PM
You do get confused easily, don't you.

yep...............

[Warning] Nimrod In Town
11-04-2005, 05:53 PM
Here's your chance to prove that your not a moron.

1. Tony, driving under the influence of crack, lost control of his SUV and crashed directly inot another vehicle. The other driver was injured, treated, and released form the hospital. However, his passenger was dead. Tony was eventually charged, arrested and found guilty of reckless driving and driving while under the influence. He was not charged with criminal homicide. Why?


2. A faggot went into the woods and got it. He sat down and looked at it. After trying for a while, he determined that he couldn't get it. He then walked his faggot ass out of the woods with it. What is it?


3. Four lesbians left for a vacation in the high mountains in Switzerland. They were all eventually found dead in a cabin. How did they die?


4. Henry, the nightwatchman for a business, was telling the police, "I had a dream the other night about someone breaking into our building, and sure enough, it all came true!" Henry's boss, overhearing the conversation, immediately went and made out a final check for Henry, then promptly fired him. Why?


5. One evening, a young playa' took his gurlfriend to the movies. This bitch gave him some great head, while they watched. But then during the movie he killed her, and was then able to get her body out of the theatre without anyone suspecting anything being wrong. How was he able to accomplish this?

1- The passenger was already dead.

2- Boner. Nah, im joking, i don't know.

3- The Air-Plane crashed.

4- He was fired because he was half sleeping and not doing his job.

5- The girl was in a wheel-chair.

Edit: I got most of them wrong.

Duracell
11-04-2005, 07:42 PM
I will be posting the correct answers shortly.

Human
11-04-2005, 07:43 PM
I know the answer to number 3...Buttsex...

Duracell
11-04-2005, 07:49 PM
1. Tony, driving under the influence of crack, lost control of his SUV and crashed directly inot another vehicle. The other driver was injured, treated, and released form the hospital. However, his passenger was dead. Tony was eventually charged, arrested and found guilty of reckless driving and driving while under the influence. He was not charged with criminal homicide. Why?

He crashed into a hearse. So the passenger was already dead.

2. A faggot went into the woods and got it. He sat down and looked at it. After trying for a while, he determined that he couldn't get it. He then walked his faggot ass out of the woods with it. What is it?

A splinter.

3. Four lesbians left for a vacation in the high mountains in Switzerland. They were all eventually found dead in a cabin. How did they die?

They were found in the cabin of a plane, that had crashed into the mountains.

4. Henry, the nightwatchman for a business, was telling the police, "I had a dream the other night about someone breaking into our building, and sure enough, it all came true!" Henry's boss, overhearing the conversation, immediately went and made out a final check for Henry, then promptly fired him. Why?

Henry works the night shift and admited to have been sleeping on the job. Sleeping on the job = You're Fired!!!

5. One evening, a young playa' took his gurlfriend to the movies. This bitch gave him some great head, while they watched. But then during the movie he killed her, and was then able to get her body out of the theatre without anyone suspecting anything being wrong. How was he able to accomplish this?

It was a drive in movie, so he drove her away unnoticed.

Give your self a pat on the back if you got them right. Which most of you did.

NDM1
11-04-2005, 07:55 PM
Ahh, the last one and the first one were good. Good thread man.

0r4ng3
11-04-2005, 07:56 PM
I'm still laughing at whoever said "boner" for question 2.

Mota Boy
11-04-2005, 09:17 PM
It was a drive in movie, so he drove her away unnoticed.

Fuck that, mine counts.

Offspring7
11-04-2005, 09:19 PM
to the people who got them right...have you heard them before or did you think it up by yourself?

.:SMASH:.
11-05-2005, 01:15 AM
i'd have to be a moron to do this