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guitar_and_drummer_guy
11-06-2005, 05:24 PM
Well i figure i should start off telling you my own...




My stupidest paper,
We were writting descriptive papers on castle's so I figured what the hell why not screw this up like everything else I do. I decided to ''BUY'' the castle I was desribing so I christened it ''Fort LaLaPoe''. Then i decided to ''buy'' an army, so i bought Kiss's army of ''super fans'' .. then i get alot of free stuff from Santa.... Then Santa gets sucked into an airplane and dies... next the 3 Little Pigs die to...from being squished....Next I invite Joseph Stalin and some other weird guy over.. Later i give everyone ''golden snowshoes''

well that about then end I wanna hear your's to see if you can compare

the_offsprings_monkey
11-06-2005, 05:26 PM
I can't remember to tell the truth.

Conspiracy of One
11-06-2005, 05:26 PM
No. Just no. Edit your post and put something a little more intelligent. Come on, I expect better from you!

IdiotOfTheDay
11-06-2005, 05:31 PM
Well i figure i should start off telling you my own...




My stupidest paper,
We were writting descriptive papers on castle's so I figured what the hell why not screw this up like everything else I do. I decided to ''BUY'' the castle I was desribing so I christened it ''Fort LaLaPoe''. Then i decided to ''buy'' an army, so i bought Kiss's army of ''super fans'' .. then i get alot of free stuff from Santa.... Then Santa gets sucked into an airplane and dies... next the 3 Little Pigs die to...from being squished....Next I invite Joseph Stalin and some other weird guy over.. Later i give everyone ''golden snowshoes''

well that about then end I wanna hear your's to see if you can compare
Um.
WHAT?

the_offsprings_monkey
11-06-2005, 05:32 PM
Um.
WHAT?
Your user name suits you.

guitar_and_drummer_guy
11-06-2005, 05:32 PM
yea exactly..... It was totally random....There was a lot of other stuff in that paper that I dont even remember

the_offsprings_monkey
11-06-2005, 05:33 PM
O...k THEN

IdiotOfTheDay
11-06-2005, 05:40 PM
I got part of the post. Until he started saying something about buying Kiss Army and a bunch of other stuff. Then I got totally lost.
I understand the idea of the board though; I've written plenty of lame papers. I think the worst was when I first moved to Florida. We write five-paragraph essays one day of each quarter of the school year; it's mandatory for most grades. But when I lived up north, we never did five-paragraph essays, so I didn't know what they were. They're scored on a scale of one to six, six being the best, and for that first essay, I got a two. x.x

guitar_and_drummer_guy
11-06-2005, 05:42 PM
So you only had to do 4 5-paragraph essays?? Well you're lucky....We do about 1 or 2 a WEEK and all of mine are like that

Conspiracy of One
11-06-2005, 05:43 PM
We just have to read a ton of books, and answer questions and vocab of each chapter. I must say, Advanced courses are far less demanding than standard classes.

wheelchairman
11-06-2005, 05:50 PM
Right now I'm writing a 5 page report on Irish politics. It's just the regurgitation of dry political facts. No analysis. I gave all my intelligent insights to the girl writing about economics, I get the boring stuff. :( I'll post it here when I'm finished. Because I always feel the need to show off.

Officer Counterfit
11-06-2005, 06:11 PM
how trampolines have helped me in life

the_offsprings_monkey
11-06-2005, 06:11 PM
I once wrote one about halo.

wheelchairman
11-06-2005, 06:14 PM
I haven't double checked it yet. So it's chalk full of mistakes.

Politics

Before we delve into the realities of Irish politics, it would be most beneficial for us to go over how this section of the report was research and written. This paper will try to examine how politics relates to the national question of Ireland, particularly with regards to the Republic, and to the Northern counties of Ireland, also known as Ulster. The report will examine how religion has played a role in Irish politics, and in what way this manifests itself in Irish policy as a moral institute. This will take a little bit of a historical perspective, however much of that will be left to the history part of this report, and the religious influence on politics will go back no more than 150 years. Then the report will look at Irish national policy with regards to the EU and economic cooperation. However most of the details for that will be left to the economics section of the report.

Irish Independence and the Establishment of the Modern Political Situation
1916 was the year of the Eastern Uprising, and when the majority of action was taken in achieving Irish independence. One would imagine that the independence of Ireland would be a joyous and uniting achievement, for the revolutionaries, however it was much a point of content among them. This is because Irelandís representatives, Michael Collins and others, went into the negotiating table with a very weak hand. Great Britain was very much a stronger military power, however distracted and weakened by the war abroad.

The only thing that could be achieved at the negotiations was the Anglo-Irish treaty. The treaty was signed in 1921, and separated from Ireland, the 6 counties, today referred to as Ulster. They were meant to become separated from Great Britain over a gradual period of time, if Ireland could prove to exist for a sustained period of time, independently.

However the signing of the treaty, proved most unsatisfactory to many of the former rebels, another series of splits happened, largely between Eamon De Valeraís group, and the group that supported Michael Collins. The period from 1922 to 1923 is known as the Irish civil war. The war ended, and out of this bloodshed, was born the Irish free state. Two political parties were thus baptized in red, these parties would go forth to become the largest Irish parties for most of Irelandís history. The first is known as Fianna FŠil, Soldiers of Destiny, as translated in English. They were founded in 1926 by Eamon De Valera. It started out as an opposition party to the Establishment, aka Michael Collins. Fianna FŠil is mostly known for itís Republican policies with regards towards the transformation of the Irish Free State. It has held the office of Prime Minister for longer than any other party, and is largely responsible for the Ireland we see today.

The Second Party, headed by Michael Collinsí faction, was Cumnadh na Gaedhael, in English, League of the Gaels. In 1933 after a merge with two other parties, it was renamed to Fine Gael, or Family of the Irish. The party has always been a centre right party. It originally supported the Anglo-Irish Treaty. For much of itís existence, itís been the opposition party in Irish politics. Only holding the Prime Minister, or Toiseach as itís known in Gaelic terminology, position a handful of times.

The oldest party in Irish politics is the Sinn Fein party, whose name means Ourselves. It is the party from which Fianna FŠil split from, as well as the Cumnad Na Gael. Sinn Fein has always been the party to sympathise most closely with the militant actions of the IRA and the Provisional IRA. The IRA being a militant group which seeks to unite the Island of Ireland through force. Sinn Fein is most known for radical Republican views, and leftist sentiments. It is the only party in Ireland to be represented in both the Dail Eirann (Parliament of Ireland), and the Northern Irish Assembly.

As you can see, since the dawn of Irish politics there has been a tendency to try and physically eliminate those who have stood in your way. That was the nature in which politics was born in Ireland. However despite the violent aspects of itís political birthing, Irish politics, on a daily basis is much more similar to that of western Europe, than that of any war zone. The various political controversies, ethnic and religious uprisings, etc. can be dealt with in the history section of this paper.

The Parties of the Northern Irish Assembly
Politics in Ďthe Northí, as itís known to those who live in Ireland, is somewhat different than to that of the Republic. There politics are much more polarized based on nationality and the national question, than it is in the south today. The Northern Irish Assembly is divided along the lines of Unionist and Republican. The Unionists support staying inside Great Britain, and have had the majority of power since the creation of the Republic. However the voting lines on which representatives were elected from, were created to largely favor the Unionists living inside the North.
This has caused much grief to the Republicans, or the Catholics who live in the North, who have been politically disenfranchised, and excluded from what should be a representative government. Discrimination from the highest levels of the counties would later give way to what became known as ĎThe Troublesí. In which political violence peaked on the Island of Ireland.

How Religion Came To Play A Part
There was a time when the movement for Irish independence, incorporated both Protest and Catholics. In fact there were no religious separations as of yet, in the island of Ireland. The separation based on religion didnít happen until what is known as the Fall of Parnell happened.
Parnell united what was the Irish parliament at the time, and the Land League. The effect was electrifying. In the 1800ís, these were two very powerful institutions in the island. And Ďrevolutioní seemed ever closer at hand. Independence for the island seemed nearly in reach. However it was well known that Parnell was having an affair with a married woman. And it seems evident that the husband knew about it for many years, he just never bothered to react, mainly because he didnít care, and because he was catholic and divorce was not an option.
However, Parnellís enemies were eventually able to convince the husband to file for divorce. For the protestants this was not a problem at all. And Parnell was still a leader in their eyes. However for the Catholics could not stand for this. Especially not the upper echelons of the Catholic church on Ireland. They shunned Parnell and split the independence movement, and the nation.
A good deal about this can be read in A Portrait of the Artist As A Young Man by James Joyce. It contains a dinner table conversation about Parnell, at the time it was happening, and gives a unique insight to how Ireland was divided at the time.






Irish Political Policy Outside of the National Question

Irish Politics today, encompasses much more than the national question. There is the whole EU situation, which has enriched the Irish economy. Questions of morality are also a hot topic in Ireland today. Such as issues about abortion and the like.

This paper will not deal much with economics since there is an economic section already provided for. However it is notable to mention that Ireland had one of the worst economies in Europe, until itís entrance into the European Economic Council.

Strict adherence to Christian religious principle is still very common in Ireland today, and this can be seen in the religious policy. If we look into the issue of Abortions for example. They were officially illegal until 1992. When a girl who was kept anonymous, was raped and impregnated by this action. And she seeked a possibility to get an abortion in the UK, or inside the Republic itself. And was essentially granted permission to have an abortion. She, however miscarriaged before the scheduled abortion. A referendum was held on abortions, in which the right to information, the right to travel, and the right to abort, were voted on. The right to information and the right to travel were approved by the voters, but the right to an abortion was less clear, so both sides claimed victory. And it is still uncertain whether or not abortions are possible. They are however legal in the North, just very rare. Another example of Christian politics influencing Irish politics, can be taken all the way back to Parnell. Divorce is still illegal in the Republic. This may however change in the near future.

guitar_and_drummer_guy
11-06-2005, 06:16 PM
I once wrote one about halo.



Nice........ I Wrote about Michael Jackson bring gay once

Officer Counterfit
11-06-2005, 06:16 PM
no way im going to read that

the_offsprings_monkey
11-06-2005, 06:17 PM
no way im going to read that
Then why fucking post, he spent ages on that and out of respect and spite towards you I'm going to read it.

guitar_and_drummer_guy
11-06-2005, 06:22 PM
RIGHT ON MAN!!!!! I havent read it though post what you think about it please..

Officer Counterfit
11-06-2005, 06:23 PM
even though i said i wasnt going to read that i did classifying me as a dummy

Amanda
11-06-2005, 06:25 PM
Snowflakes and Coca-cola

the_offsprings_monkey
11-06-2005, 06:25 PM
RIGHT ON MAN!!!!! I havent read it though post what you think about it please..
Meet Mr grammar, then work on this post and post it again.

guitar_and_drummer_guy
11-06-2005, 06:28 PM
Why??????
this thread is about school papers...... not correct grammar

bd007h
11-06-2005, 08:14 PM
correct grammar is an important part of school papers

the_offsprings_monkey
11-06-2005, 10:40 PM
I've never really been interested in school papers as in... newspaper? whoa and I just realized how weird the word paper is.. weird.
Why is it weird?

the_offsprings_monkey
11-06-2005, 10:45 PM
I don't know, I just thought it looked like it should be spelled differently.kinda like pap-er?

bd007h
11-06-2005, 11:08 PM
I believe what he means by school papers is like essays and research papers, not the school newspaper

the_offsprings_monkey
11-06-2005, 11:18 PM
Yea I thought thingy was a little mixed up some where.

JohnnyNemesis
11-06-2005, 11:27 PM
I wrote a cool paper about how capitalism affects people's perceptions of the poor in New Orleans.

I would post it here, but meh. I'll just PM it if anyone's interested.

I write a whole bunch. And love it.

Telekinesis
11-07-2005, 01:07 AM
In the year 7 aim test we had to write about an incredible machine and I invented a video game that actually lets you go in the game and run around and stuff, like that tihng on Futurama when they went on the internet. But yeah the game was a Simpson's game and I was Homer and my best mate was Lisa and I tihnk she ended up boking me over the head with a branch or something it was really cool! Alsoi one of the ex-friends knew a guy who wrote an essay on farts, what a retard

guitar_and_drummer_guy
11-07-2005, 04:36 PM
Wow..... Sounds kinda.....fun......well lets see has anyone written any violent stories.....


say like the one i wrote about Michael Jackson being trampled by 50 buh-jillion ( a made up number) angry parents ??/?

0r4ng3
11-07-2005, 04:37 PM
I once wrote a paper about how chewing gum is made. Granted, I was 7, but I think it still deserves a mention.

[Warning] Nimrod In Town
11-07-2005, 04:38 PM
I don't know. When i was in 5th grade, maybe? I don't remember, but what i do remember is that i was a weird little boy.

guitar_and_drummer_guy
11-07-2005, 04:42 PM
Well.................. I like girls! Eat that you communistic scumbag!!!!!!!!


That was random..


Well for all the ''stupid papers I write ... I sit with a dictionary an flip through to random pages and use random words .... its fun

guitar_and_drummer_guy
11-07-2005, 04:43 PM
Of course I look at the definitions first.

JohnnyNemesis
11-07-2005, 04:49 PM
You're an idiot. Stop living.

guitar_and_drummer_guy
11-07-2005, 04:58 PM
You're an idiot. Stop living.



Well thats kinda impossible. Im so stupid I actually belive if I will actually get smarter

guitar_and_drummer_guy
11-07-2005, 04:59 PM
Thats kinda sad.

guitar_and_drummer_guy
11-07-2005, 05:57 PM
Wow its quiet!!!

Something to Believe In
11-07-2005, 06:16 PM
I got part of the post. Until he started saying something about buying Kiss Army and a bunch of other stuff. Then I got totally lost.
I understand the idea of the board though; I've written plenty of lame papers. I think the worst was when I first moved to Florida. We write five-paragraph essays one day of each quarter of the school year; it's mandatory for most grades. But when I lived up north, we never did five-paragraph essays, so I didn't know what they were. They're scored on a scale of one to six, six being the best, and for that first essay, I got a two. x.x


FCAT sucks ass.......and thats Florida Comprehension Assesment Test for those of you that don't know....and probably don't care either.........

guitar_and_drummer_guy
11-07-2005, 06:26 PM
sounds............................interesting!

guitar_and_drummer_guy
11-07-2005, 06:50 PM
DANG!! its quiet

Apathy
11-07-2005, 06:59 PM
ugh. When I was in Sixth Grade, i had to write a "creative" Science Paper as if I was a Rain Drop, and Explain what the evaporation process was/felt like.

I specifically Remember: "Whoooosh! I could feel I was being Condensed!"

There is no paper that is stupider than that.

Although, I did write a science/Math paper in eighth grade about Kevin Bacon Eating a family of midgets because they were stranded on a desert island. After he ate them, it turned out he could fly, and destroyed the land with his laser vision, then fought godzilla and got swallowed, then self destructed in godzillas stomach and put him self back together miraculously, So they forgave him for eating the midgets and Decided to make Footloose: Live and Reloaded, but was accidentally beheaded from the head of a gazelle that his Stepmoms Ghost Threw at him.

It was initially a word problem asking Something along the lines of, If they are stranded on a desert island, and the father weighs X, and the mother weighs X-Z , But the Canoe can only carry Y, and The kids both together Weigh Z. The Kids Cannot Row.

I don't really remember the problem. All I remember is I wasn't sure how to do it and I had a lot of time left over since that was the last problem. My teacher told me if I didn't understand I should just make something up, She ended up making my creative writing teacher give me extra credit, Even though i did fail the Science/Math Paper.

IdiotOfTheDay
11-07-2005, 07:11 PM
FCAT sucks ass.......and thats Florida Comprehension Assesment Test for those of you that don't know....and probably don't care either.........
Gah, I know, I just want to stab them...I remember when I first moved here (that was 5th grade, by the way) the guidance counselor in my new school dressed up as a cat, with this big-ass "F" on her shirt, and went on the school news and blabbed about what you can do to prepare for the FCAT, I think I was scarred for life.
Now I'm a big eighth grader, so I have the science one for this year...and just when we thought those things couldn't take fucking longer....>.<
By the way, StBI, whereabouts do you live? I'm in the Sarasota-Bradenton area, if you know where that is. We've been amazingly lucky with the hurricanes; every time one was supposedly heading towards us, it swerved and missed. Which really sucks for everyone else.
...But WE were lucky! xD

And to whoever complained about me having to only write five-paragraph essays, keep in mind that I was only talking about one paper. I'm on my school newspaper, and advanced English, so I write a lot more than just that.

dalaksta
11-07-2005, 07:13 PM
i havent written many things stupid on a school paper
but during school this retarted teacher we had, who thought the mayflower was one of columbus's three ships, had this box where you could write notes to her and tell her stuff. she also has 4 kids within 1 and 8 grade
so, my friend writes, you are fucking stupid ass hole. how many times have you had sex? probably dont wanna know.
the stupid thing was he wrote his name on the paper

IdiotOfTheDay
11-07-2005, 07:37 PM
i havent written many things stupid on a school paper
but during school this retarted teacher we had, who thought the mayflower was one of columbus's three ships, had this box where you could write notes to her and tell her stuff. she also has 4 kids within 1 and 8 grade
so, my friend writes, you are fucking stupid ass hole. how many times have you had sex? probably dont wanna know.
the stupid thing was he wrote his name on the paper
The teacher needs to check what she teaches. But your friend sounds pretty retarded too.
Your teacher sounds like my math teacher. She makes the stupidest mistakes. For example: "So since three plus two is four..."
The sad thing is, I'm not learning regular old math from her--I'm taking Algebra I for a high school credit. 0.o

Something to Believe In
11-07-2005, 07:42 PM
The teacher needs to check what she teaches. But your friend sounds pretty retarded too.
Your teacher sounds like my math teacher. She makes the stupidest mistakes. For example: "So since three plus two is four..."
The sad thing is, I'm not learning regular old math from her--I'm taking Algebra I for a high school credit. 0.o



wow...that's just......wow..... :confused:

Something to Believe In
11-07-2005, 07:48 PM
Gah, I know, I just want to stab them...I remember when I first moved here (that was 5th grade, by the way) the guidance counselor in my new school dressed up as a cat, with this big-ass "F" on her shirt, and went on the school news and blabbed about what you can do to prepare for the FCAT, I think I was scarred for life.
Now I'm a big eighth grader, so I have the science one for this year...and just when we thought those things couldn't take fucking longer....>.<
By the way, StBI, whereabouts do you live? I'm in the Sarasota-Bradenton area, if you know where that is. We've been amazingly lucky with the hurricanes; every time one was supposedly heading towards us, it swerved and missed. Which really sucks for everyone else.
...But WE were lucky! xD

And to whoever complained about me having to only write five-paragraph essays, keep in mind that I was only talking about one paper. I'm on my school newspaper, and advanced English, so I write a lot more than just that.


yeah i know where that is.....I live in Palm Harbor, about 20 miles from Tampa, 12 miles from Clearwater beach......yeah, that is enough to scar you for life....... Science FCAT wasnt that hard, at least ididnt think so.......yeah im a freshman so, obviously, i took it last yeargood thing is, next yr is my last year ive got to take them.......i think........i hope.......yeah you guys did get lucky w/ the hurricanes........wilma sucked.......just windy......but they canceled school so that was good........

dalaksta
11-07-2005, 11:16 PM
The teacher needs to check what she teaches. But your friend sounds pretty retarded too.
Your teacher sounds like my math teacher. She makes the stupidest mistakes. For example: "So since three plus two is four..."
The sad thing is, I'm not learning regular old math from her--I'm taking Algebra I for a high school credit. 0.o
yea my teacher and my friend are retarted
yea that old teacher had to teach us sex ed., again, and she did the stupidest stuff. she made us watch this movie but before she started it she said, "this movie may get a little porny"

algebra!!!
youre doomed

bd007h
11-07-2005, 11:50 PM
I don't know about stupidest, but the coolest thing I ever got to write a school paper on was a 7 page research paper on Kurt Cobain and Nirvana

the_offsprings_monkey
11-07-2005, 11:54 PM
Longest one I've ever wrote was like 14 pages of A4, my hand was like killing me after (I did it all in one go)

.:SMASH:.
11-08-2005, 01:55 AM
i gave 50 reasons why god cant be real at a catholic school

neocon58
11-08-2005, 03:13 AM
I finished a 1,200 word report on muffins a few weeks ago. No joke.

IdiotOfTheDay
11-08-2005, 05:40 AM
yea my teacher and my friend are retarted
yea that old teacher had to teach us sex ed., again, and she did the stupidest stuff. she made us watch this movie but before she started it she said, "this movie may get a little porny"

algebra!!!
youre doomed
We know the real answers, so it's not like it makes a difference...all our notes and answers are from the book, so just as long as she sees that what she ended up with, and what the book gave her, are totally different, she can correct it. Or she might just bitch about the book, like she always does. Guess we'll find out when it happens...

memento
11-08-2005, 06:31 AM
I wrote an essay on if Hitler was a dictator. It seems simple answer to me but it's not so simple.

killer_queen
11-08-2005, 07:49 AM
About 6 or 7 years ago, on a biology exam there was a question like "what is an anofel"(or something like that, you know the insect) and I wrote "it is a living animal". I was such an idiot.

Snouf
11-08-2005, 08:21 AM
When I was 14 my French teacher ask us to write an essay about "you thought you were knowing somebody but you realise you didn't... Write your reactions" and I told her that in the beginning I was pleased to know she'll be our French teacher but finally she didn't have any sense of humour and she prefered be stupid ... She liked to laugh about students but she didn't accept anything from us... So I was really sad to have met her...
She has been comprehensive... I had 15/20 :) and she was so surprised of my essay that she have never corrected the faults!

JoY
11-08-2005, 08:27 AM
self chosen subject; animal testing.
school chosen subject; Kaspar Hauser.

JoY
11-08-2005, 08:28 AM
Longest one I've ever wrote was like 14 pages of A4, my hand was like killing me after (I did it all in one go)
longest one I've ever written was about 80 pages, A4.

memento
11-08-2005, 08:41 AM
Typed?

The max i've done is my most recent 4000 word essay. But my dissertation will be 15k. And my future books/papers will be 100,000s.

JoY
11-08-2005, 08:53 AM
typed, yes. Times New Roman, 10. I think it was about 54000 words.
but we had to make a lot of papers in high school. my Dutch bookreports alone were over 300 pages.

Human
11-08-2005, 07:26 PM
Porbably vivid verbs...whatever they are...I wrote an 8 paragraph report on why vivid verbs were important in writing then I found out I did the wrong thing...

guitar_and_drummer_guy
11-08-2005, 07:37 PM
hmmmm sounds fun...If I have to do a report over 2 pages I just dont bother even trying it ..luckily its never happend

Officer Counterfit
11-08-2005, 07:43 PM
Porbably vivid verbs...whatever they are...I wrote an 8 paragraph report on why vivid verbs were important in writing then I found out I did the wrong thing...
that's not a very stupid thing to do a paper on at all

guitar_and_drummer_guy
11-08-2005, 07:49 PM
yea thats right thats kinda stupid you should have lied and said like 8 pages or something.