View Full Version : Best Essay Ever:

11-22-2005, 12:54 AM
Anyways, Here is an essay I wrote after having gone drinking all night. Last year. It's awesome and I got an A.

B. Discuss the importance of the computer in the workplace today.

The Overtaking

Are computers taking over? Thatís really an important question when considering the importance of computers in the workplace. If Hollywood has taught me anything, itís that computers canít be controlled. Everything is becoming more and more technological. The IT industry is taking up more and more of what once was a source of employment for thousands of people.

Itís like back in the industrialization period of England, when weaving machines replaced the weavers, there was little work left for them. It created quite a crisis, because many just ended up starving on the streets. It was a rather harsh reality. We are witnessing the beginning of the technological industrialization. However it could go the other way, where it may even create more employment, or at least better skilled workers.

We can see that computers change the face of the workplace today. In one case they will almost completely replace most physical labor in the western world, leaving us with a workforce of secretaries to maintain and work these computers. Or in a rare case they may be used to increase the skills of the workers, like in the matrix when they downloaded into their brains.

The Terminator and how it is relevant today

According to the visionaries who created the Terminator trilogy, computers will eventually be completely self-sufficient. That was the main problem behind the films. They became self-aware and saw that man was a threat and had to kill him. In a way that is what is happening today. They may not be self-aware, but they are taking away the livelihood of thousands, nearly every day. Itís a rather slippery path we are treading. Perhaps itís more important that we become self-aware. It is not computers that are threatened by man; it is man who are threatened by computers.

In Conclusion we can see that computers are taking an ever more important role in the workplace. Seeing as they basically are taking over the work of people. Technology and computer grow, while the work for the average man decreases, and itís already causing serious problems in the United States. Everyone who was trained in IT has to learn a new trade if they have any hope for a job.

Sin Studly
11-22-2005, 02:07 AM
And people wonder why I have no respect for the formally educated.

11-22-2005, 08:38 AM
I had to pass out some stupid magazine at a university for chemists and mathematicians. For 3 hours. By the end of the day I was dreaming of a flaming death for all of them.

And I still can't do math or chemistry.

11-22-2005, 09:51 AM
Other than its initial repetition, my composition one essay about goths from my first term in college destroys your essay (KillboyPowerhead2009 makes an appearance also).

Goths, it seems you can't go anywhere without stepping into a big pile of them. More and more children these days are deciding they hate their parents and want to be "individuals" at younger and younger ages. It's truly sad. Many may not agree with me, but it's likely that they hate their parents. This essay is about how much I hate Goths.
Not many things can irritate me as quickly as Goths, in fact, I can only think of two other social groups off of the top of my head (Feminazis and Liberals). But I could write entire tomes on these groups. Currently I spend my time hating the Goths.
So where does this animosity stem from? After all, I'm prone to wearing black and as I type this I'm wearing eyeliner. Wouldn't that, by definition, make me a Goth? The answer is no. Goths have a certain mind set. Goths do what they do to get attention. Goths do everything they do to get attention and after getting the attention they so desperately seek what do they do? Complain about it as society not accepting them for what they "are."
But I'm getting ahead of myself. Let's start with the basics. There are three main reasons that I don't like Goths. The first of which is their outlook on society. They attempt to be a counterculture and claim to be individuals. What they are actually doing is alienating themselves from the rest of society and conforming to their trend. They aren't individuals. They aren't "tortured artists." They do what they do to impress their friends while simultaneously attempting to be spooky towards normal, productive members of society.
Goths are non-conformist conformists (that is, they conform to nonconformity). Their entire culture is based around being different even though all of them are, essentially, the same. Their entire personalities are fake. While they claim to be individuals they actually have to stick to certain stereotypes and bylaws of their little dysfunctional groups. If a Goth enjoys listening to certain music, playing sports, or tanning they are automatically stripped of their so-called credentials within their group of losers (I don't understand why they see this as a bad thing).
The second thing that bothers me about Goths is their pretentious attitude. Goths act as if they deserve the respect and reverence of their peers even though they have done nothing to earn said respect. If you don't act like you care about what they claim to represent they'll say that you're "close minded" and "hate those that are different." Here's an example of a conversation with a Goth (from an online message board):

Goth: It's not a fuckin creature It is a person Quit hating on the different people.
Me: When something tries that hard to look 'spooky' or whatnot they are less than human, get over it. Goth's aren't sexy... they're smelly, pretentious assholes that hate their fathers.
Goth: I'm not even going to say anything except: We don't smell and not all of us hate our fathers,not all of us are pretentious assholes ... You're gay.
Me: This is what I could decipher:

Notice how horrible Gothic grammar and punctuation are. This child couldn't even begin to argue with me, I schooled them. As soon as I insulted a Goth they replied with "Quit hating on the 'different' people." Need I say more on this?
The last main reason for my animosity towards Goths are their suicide threats/attempts. A Goth cannot last one day without talking about how they're almost committed suicide before or how they're going to kill themselves. I hate it so much when these little sponges come around and talk about killing themselves. It's not because I don't value human life, it's because a Goth's motivation for their suicide obsession is based around their need for constant attention.
When a Goth threatens suicide they always do it in the most public way possible. Most make posts on online message boards in attempt to get everyone's pity. When it succeeds and they get the attention they crave they'll thank everyone and say that the board is the only reason that they didn't commit suicide and they'll want to be in constant contact with whoever "talked them out of" committing suicide. When their plans backfire their typical response is "LOL!!!!!!!!11 J/K evry1. I wuld neva kill me!!!!111 ROFLOLSTFU!!!!!!111." Goths usually use net speak because it's almost as retarded as them.
So I hate Goths. But really, can you blame me? Would you want to know a person that acted in the manner in which I've described? It's truly a pathetic existence and I'm glad that those that live it eventually slip up and when they're making the cuts on their arms that bring them so much attention they accidently slit their wrists and die. I'm really not a bad person though, I just hate Goths.

Back in Black
11-22-2005, 09:58 AM
that essay sucked.

11-22-2005, 03:59 PM
that essay sucked.
Aww, you're only saying that because it's above your reading level. Go now, and do your book report on the newest Goosebumps book.

11-22-2005, 05:47 PM
Aww, you're only saying that because it's above your reading level. Go now, and do your book report on the newest Goosebumps book.

AHAHAHAHAH OMFG....I died when I read that...lol

You can take shortcuts in goosebumps books too!! LOL

11-22-2005, 06:00 PM
Ninthlayer, what grade did you recieve?

11-23-2005, 01:34 AM
Like an A or a B. It doesn't really matter, with essays like that do you think I took the class seriously? I mainly wrote things just to piss off the gothic kid in class that always sat next to me.

11-23-2005, 06:48 AM
hehehe, how is it possible not to love ninth?