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View Full Version : I've been meaning to get this off my chest for awhile. ORAL SEX!!!



JohnnyNemesis
11-22-2005, 08:31 AM
Okay, this is a conversation I've had with my friends often. I could probably explain my position and rant on and on and on, but it might be best to summarize and just...let you all get to talkin'.

To all the heterosexual men out there:

If you don't go down on your woman, and ENJOY it too, you sicken me, coward. Yes, I called you a COWARD. What the HELL is wrong with you?

That is all. Discuss.

JoY
11-22-2005, 08:33 AM
I lub oral sex. recieving & giving. <33 *smile*

the_GoDdEsS
11-22-2005, 08:33 AM
Omg, this was good.

Endymion
11-22-2005, 08:36 AM
If you don't go down on your woman, and ENJOY it too, you sicken me, coward. Yes, I called you a COWARD. What the HELL is wrong with you?
i generally agree.

JohnnyNemesis
11-22-2005, 08:37 AM
So I take it you'll all be joining me in executing the aforementioned cowards?

JoY
11-22-2005, 08:37 AM
most definitely.

Preocupado
11-22-2005, 08:57 AM
that's a very complicated thing

it requires... caution... and... shower first.

JohnnyNemesis
11-22-2005, 08:58 AM
^Caution? CAUTION? Fuck that. A shower, yeah, that goes without saying. Stop being a coward and get to lickin'!

JoY
11-22-2005, 09:00 AM
showers are required regularly anyway. it doesn't necessarily have to be five seconds before oral sex takes place, not even five hours. as long as the object of lust showers regularly. keyword.

& caution?? wtf? teh vagina is going to swallow you whole?

JohnnyNemesis
11-22-2005, 09:02 AM
^Exactly.

Fuck that, I sense hesitation from Preocupado. He's on my LIST of cowards who don't thoroughly enjoy cunilingus.

Tizzalicious
11-22-2005, 09:03 AM
Hahaha. I agree with Bella.

As long as the girl showers regulary, there shouldn't be any weird smells.

And caution, wtf?

Preocupado
11-22-2005, 09:07 AM
lolz

i just mentioned caution because the cunnilingus can hurt the male's feelings :(

besides, women never ask for oral...

the_GoDdEsS
11-22-2005, 09:08 AM
besides, women never ask for oral...

Why ask when you can force?

Tizzalicious
11-22-2005, 09:08 AM
We shouldn't have to ASK for it. Geez.

JoY
11-22-2005, 09:09 AM
We shouldn't have to ASK for it. Geez.
exactly. that's as bad as explaining a joke. it just takes the fun out of it.

JohnnyNemesis
11-22-2005, 09:09 AM
Why ask when you can force?

Exactly.

Being forced is better anyway. I'm being serious too.


besides, women never ask for oral...
If you're waiting for her to ask, you're DEFINITELY on my coward list. You're supposed to want to do it!

Preocupado
11-22-2005, 09:13 AM
i abstain from the matter. i have much thinking to do :( :( :(

JohnnyNemesis
11-22-2005, 09:14 AM
^Less thinkin', more lickin'.

the_GoDdEsS
11-22-2005, 09:15 AM
^Less thinkin', more lickin'.

Hahaha, let's hang that sign over our beds some nights.

Sin Studly
11-22-2005, 09:18 AM
Agreed, and I'm taking it a step futher... and yes, y'all know that step means rimming.

Idiot
11-22-2005, 09:18 AM
I'm all for the 'lickin'. Why shouldn't us guys return the favour?
I'm with JohnnyNemesis

JohnnyNemesis
11-22-2005, 09:19 AM
Hahaha, let's hang that sign over our beds some nights.

Yes! I suppose we should help these cowards rather than execute them, so maybe we should hang it over their beds too.


Agreed, and I'm taking it a step futher... and yes, y'all know that step means rimming.
I'm with you on this one in theory, though I've never been able to use it in practice :(

JohnnyNemesis
11-22-2005, 09:20 AM
I'm all for the 'lickin'. Why shouldn't us guys return the favour?
I'm with JohnnyNemesis

I'm glad you agree, but one quick note: it shouldn't be "returning the favor". It should just happen, all the time!

Preocupado
11-22-2005, 09:22 AM
I'm all for the 'lickin'. Why shouldn't us guys return the favour?
I'm with JohnnyNemesis

what johnny said.
returning a favour never crossed my mind, that's alot worst than being THE COWARD.

Sin Studly
11-22-2005, 09:23 AM
I totally endorse rimming, and calling all you non-rimmers faggots.

Preocupado
11-22-2005, 09:33 AM
*wikki search on rimming*

oh gosh that's even more complicated. where's my sertraline when i need it?

Sunny
11-22-2005, 12:32 PM
We shouldn't have to ASK for it. Geez.

seconded.

i do however like being asked "can i, please?".. but that's a whole different story. :D

Kerr
11-22-2005, 12:42 PM
If I had a woman, I'd happily give her a good lick.

ninthlayer
11-22-2005, 12:43 PM
But you never will.

wheelchairman
11-22-2005, 12:43 PM
I never give oral sex. I think it's dirty and wrong.

ninthlayer
11-22-2005, 12:44 PM
You're a liar and you know it.
Chicago?
Fag.

Tizzalicious
11-22-2005, 12:47 PM
seconded.

i do however like being asked "can i, please?".. but that's a whole different story. :D

Oh yes. I like that too.

Who would say no to that though?

The Talking Pie
11-22-2005, 12:48 PM
I agree. Unprompted and wholly-enjoyed. Else half the fun's gone.

ruroken
11-22-2005, 01:09 PM
Um...I fear what it'd taste like...what's it taste like?
That...is...if I ever (though I never will) get the chance.
Funny, though, I was thinking about this yesterday.

Izie
11-22-2005, 01:10 PM
I love Johnny, and endorse Justin's rimming idea.

Yes.

yay
11-22-2005, 02:24 PM
Okay, this is a conversation I've had with my friends often. I could probably explain my position and rant on and on and on, but it might be best to summarize and just...let you all get to talkin'.

To all the heterosexual men out there:

If you don't go down on your woman, and ENJOY it too, you sicken me, coward. Yes, I called you a COWARD. What the HELL is wrong with you?

That is all. Discuss.
I enjoy everything to do with sex with a woman, however I'm not a fan of oral. Unless it's being performed on me, I'm just not interested. I think it's a bit dirty to be licking an area which someone pisses from.

wheelchairman
11-22-2005, 02:25 PM
I enjoy everything to do with sex with a woman, however I'm not a fan of oral. Unless it's being performed on me, I'm just not interested. I think it's a bit dirty to be licking an area which someone pisses from.
You've obviously never had sex.

Izie
11-22-2005, 02:27 PM
His oppinion doesn't count anyway.

platinumpt
11-22-2005, 02:27 PM
I'm with the majority of (male) people that posted here.

platinumpt
11-22-2005, 02:28 PM
I enjoy everything to do with sex with a woman, however I'm not a fan of oral. Unless it's being performed on me, I'm just not interested. I think it's a bit dirty to be licking an area which someone pisses from.
So, whoever does oral sex on you can't be disgusted by licking the place from where your piss comes out, right?

the_GoDdEsS
11-22-2005, 02:34 PM
I enjoy everything to do with sex with a woman, however I'm not a fan of oral. Unless it's being performed on me, I'm just not interested. I think it's a bit dirty to be licking an area which someone pisses from.

The big Vagina will eat you with its teeth and then digest you.

platinumpt
11-22-2005, 02:43 PM
The big Vagina will eat you with its teeth and then digest you.
That was just incredible. Let me do you some oral.

yay
11-22-2005, 02:44 PM
So, whoever does oral sex on you can't be disgusted by licking the place from where your piss comes out, right?
If they don't want to do it, then they don't have to. I'm not forcing anyone to do shit. It would be a bit hypocrytical of me, not wanting to perform it, and then expecting my girlfriend to do it.

the_GoDdEsS
11-22-2005, 02:46 PM
That was just incredible. Let me do you some oral.

Sorry but you're unworthy.

yay
11-22-2005, 02:46 PM
You've obviously never had sex.I'm not going to lie about it, Im 18 and yeah I've never done it. I've made out before, which is a step ahead of some of these retards on this board who have never been kissed by a female other than their mother and granmothers. I will never force a girl to be ready, when she is ready, I will take the next step.

platinumpt
11-22-2005, 02:49 PM
Sorry but you're unworthy.
Meh. Your loss.

sKratch
11-22-2005, 03:15 PM
Um...I fear what it'd taste like...what's it taste like?
That...is...if I ever (though I never will) get the chance.
Funny, though, I was thinking about this yesterday.
Watch the Colonel Angus sketch with Christopher Walken. It'll teach you everything you need to know.

0r4ng3
11-22-2005, 04:28 PM
The big Vagina will eat you with its teeth and then digest you.
That's a risk many are willing to take.

[Warning] Nimrod In Town
11-22-2005, 04:30 PM
Heh, oral sex. Allison doesn't even want normal sex.

JohnnyNemesis
11-22-2005, 04:38 PM
I love you too, Izariffic.

I'm going to ignore most of the 'tards here. (Read: yay)

ruroken, when I was your age I had some "fear" about the taste too. Your fears stem more form curiosity about the unknown than anything. To answer your question though, it's really hard to describe, but I can just say that it tastes... good. REALLY FUCKING GOOD, which kind of explains why I'm so adamant about this particular subject.

The joy is in the act itself though, not necessarily the taste.

platinumpt
11-22-2005, 05:29 PM
^ I love you for what you just said man. You managed to describe it just the way I feel it too. And probably most of the guys.

wheelchairman
11-22-2005, 05:30 PM
Yeah you obviously don't do it for the taste. To me it always reminds me of the taste of a penny or something. But I believe I'm the only one who thinks this.

And it's a filthy filthy thing to do, and no christian would perform in this act.

platinumpt
11-22-2005, 05:33 PM
No fucking way. Licking Dostoievski is WAAY filthier!

nieh
11-22-2005, 06:08 PM
Yeah you obviously don't do it for the taste. To me it always reminds me of the taste of a penny or something. But I believe I'm the only one who thinks this.

Nope. Plenty of people have said so and I must say I agree. Not 100% or anything but it's the closest comparison out there.

Italia311
11-22-2005, 06:27 PM
Damn straight. Oral sex is where its at...

It's all about makin her scream...

I love it.

sKratch
11-22-2005, 06:37 PM
I love you too, Izariffic.

I'm going to ignore most of the 'tards here. (Read: yay)

ruroken, when I was your age I had some "fear" about the taste too. Your fears stem more form curiosity about the unknown than anything. To answer your question though, it's really hard to describe, but I can just say that it tastes... good. REALLY FUCKING GOOD, which kind of explains why I'm so adamant about this particular subject.

The joy is in the act itself though, not necessarily the taste.
I don't know if anyone else is gonna go as far as saying it tastes "good"... I know I myself had to get used to it and it's not the greatest flavor out of the rainbow. More later! I'm home for the holiday and I gotta hang out with my buds.

Sin Studly
11-22-2005, 06:40 PM
I think it tastes good. But then, it can taste horrible. And the 'penny' thing is a pretty good comparison, actually, one I never thought of.

edit ; and I love Iza for making it look like I invented the rimjob (I did, by the way)

yay
11-22-2005, 06:55 PM
I love you too, Izariffic.

I'm going to ignore most of the 'tards here. (Read: yay)

ruroken, when I was your age I had some "fear" about the taste too. Your fears stem more form curiosity about the unknown than anything. To answer your question though, it's really hard to describe, but I can just say that it tastes... good. REALLY FUCKING GOOD, which kind of explains why I'm so adamant about this particular subject.

The joy is in the act itself though, not necessarily the taste.
Why do you choose to ignore me my friend? Is it because our love can never be, or because someone actually has a different opinion from you?

Sin Studly
11-22-2005, 07:02 PM
It's probably because you're a worthless virgin.

JohnnyNemesis
11-22-2005, 07:19 PM
^What he said.

I noticed the penny comparison. I would go as far as saying it tastes GOOD though, sKratch.

The_Hombre
11-22-2005, 07:57 PM
Recieving is better. Nothing better than a brew and a blowjob in bed. aahh makes the day worthwhile. My friend says it's a disgusting and depraved act. Hmm. Then again he's a little weird.

Sin Studly
11-22-2005, 09:14 PM
I get blowjobs from my girlfriend because now that I've turned 23 or some other such ridiculously old age to retain virginity, I've become sexually active with my girlfriend and I'm damn proud of it.

The_Hombre
11-22-2005, 09:18 PM
My girlfriend is so fucking sexy.

It's a pity you can't remain courteous for more than one conversation.

All About Eve
11-22-2005, 09:22 PM
He is when there's need to be.

yay
11-23-2005, 02:59 PM
^What he said.

I noticed the penny comparison. I would go as far as saying it tastes GOOD though, sKratch.
Ok, so you have absolutely no respect for virgins do you?

0r4ng3
11-23-2005, 03:00 PM
Ok, so you have absolutely no respect for virgins do you?
He doesn't have respect for the blatantly obvious virgins (i.e. you).

JohnnyNemesis
11-23-2005, 03:02 PM
Ok, so you have absolutely no respect for virgins do you?

I wasn't rude to ruroken, now was I? I have no respect for virgins who happen to be complete morons.

Paint_It_Black
11-23-2005, 03:44 PM
Awesome thread. I'm a big fan of teh oral. However, I wouldn't label anyone who doesn't enjoy it as cowardly.

The comment about being forced cracked me up. I thought I was unusual in liking that.

yay
11-23-2005, 03:47 PM
I wasn't rude to ruroken, now was I? I have no respect for virgins who happen to be complete morons.
You can play this little dance as much as you want. But you were the one out of line when I returned not me. Ask the Mods I had been behaving while you were away. It was when I returned that you started calling me a moron and pretending you didn't know who I was. I didn't do shit. I don't care what you think of me, but trying to make it look as if your the victim of my stupid behaviour isn't going to get you far.

Paint_It_Black
11-23-2005, 03:49 PM
I've been spending about 15 minutes a week online and somehow I still can't open these forums without seeing Yay mentioning moderators.

sKratch
11-23-2005, 03:49 PM
As an addendum, I must acknowledge my support of the "penny" comparison.

JohnnyNemesis
11-23-2005, 03:58 PM
You can play this little dance as much as you want. But you were the one out of line when I returned not me. Ask the Mods I had been behaving while you were away. It was when I returned that you started calling me a moron and pretending you didn't know who I was. I didn't do shit. I don't care what you think of me, but trying to make it look as if your the victim of my stupid behaviour isn't going to get you far.

Oh for the love of fuck STOP CRYING. IT IS NOT A BIG DEAL.

Jeez, why do you even give a shit whether I remember you or not? It's not my fault you're so irrelevant, Fuck you and your talk of dances and conspiracy theories. Grow up, get a fucking life, and stop polluting the thread if you have nothing to say about cunlingus.

Oh, and stop crying too.

yay
11-23-2005, 04:05 PM
Oh for the love of fuck STOP CRYING. IT IS NOT A BIG DEAL.

Jeez, why do you even give a shit whether I remember you or not? It's not my fault you're so irrelevant, Fuck you and your talk of dances and conspiracy theories. Grow up, get a fucking life, and stop polluting the thread if you have nothing to say about cunlingus.

Oh, and stop crying too.I love it when people respond to defeat with anger and an attempt to downgrade the opposition. I will leave you now to rest in your defeat. However, know this, you are smalltime. Beyond this forum, no-one likes you. You have no social life. This is evident by the fact you are on board all the time, even in off peak hours. Also, the fact you have to share your sexual stories with people you haven't even met is quite pathetic. Don't you have friends to brag to? I guess not. Carry on.

JohnnyNemesis
11-23-2005, 04:13 PM
Also, the fact you have to share your sexual stories with people you haven't even met is quite pathetic.

I haven't shared any sexual stories, but I have attempted to discuss sexual acts and sexual preferences. Funny how you consider it pathetic, yet responded to the thread in an attempt to contribute your own sexual stories.


However, know this, you are smalltime. Beyond this forum, no-one likes you. You have no social life.

Says the person that's so insecure that he flips out just because a BBS member doesn't remember him.

Also, virgins shouldn't talk about anyone else not having a social life. They/you really shouldn't.


I will leave you now to rest in your defeat.

...are you regressing? Seriously, this is some really juvenile shit right here.

Mota Boy
11-23-2005, 04:54 PM
Sorry to derail the thread any further - I've just been skimming the last couple pages - but who is this yay guy and why should you know him?

Also, the wording of this thread's title - "I've been meaning to get this off my chest for a while. ORAL SEX" just keeps making me think of you 69'ing and then not bathing for a week.

sKratch
11-23-2005, 05:26 PM
That is a wonderous image.

Sunny
11-23-2005, 09:37 PM
The big Vagina will eat you with its teeth and then digest you.

http://www.darkdaughta.com/vagina%20dentata.gif

*chomp!*

Nicole
11-23-2005, 11:47 PM
hahaha, nice picture.

Oral sex is fantastic. Took me a while to understand the "giving" side of things but I got there. Sometimes it just takes the right person :/

calichix
11-23-2005, 11:49 PM
good show.

Tizzalicious
11-24-2005, 03:05 AM
Haha, awesome picture Sunny.

JoY
11-24-2005, 05:10 AM
Oral sex is fantastic. Took me a while to understand the "giving" side of things but I got there. Sometimes it just takes the right person :/
exact same here.

& Sunny, omgz! hahahaha.

offspringis the best band
11-24-2005, 05:56 AM
I love it when people respond to defeat with anger and an attempt to downgrade the opposition. I will leave you now to rest in your defeat. However, know this, you are smalltime. Beyond this forum, no-one likes you. You have no social life. This is evident by the fact you are on board all the time, even in off peak hours. Also, the fact you have to share your sexual stories with people you haven't even met is quite pathetic. Don't you have friends to brag to? I guess not. Carry on.

I would like to state for the record that I do know Johnny Nemesis in real life and he is an incredibly succesful, likeable guy who gets laid more than you do.

Sin Studly
11-24-2005, 07:11 AM
....who gets laid more than you do.

Really? More than never?

Nina
11-24-2005, 09:47 AM
Whoever said that the vagina is a dirty place because the piss comes out of there....WOW, you're fucking dumb. I've never heard so many wrongs in one sentence.
A (lets say, "normal") vagina is cleaner than your mouth will ever be. Therefore: Shut it, homo.

JoY
11-24-2005, 09:50 AM
I would like to state for the record that I do know Johnny Nemesis in real life and he is an incredibly succesful, likeable guy who gets laid more than you do.
lucky bastard.. so how is Ricky between the sheets?

JohnnyNemesis
11-25-2005, 07:35 AM
Really? More than never?

Well played!


lucky bastard.. so how is Ricky between the sheets?

You'll know soon enough.

JoY
11-25-2005, 07:39 AM
ooo, sounds like shaggy-shaggy. sounds like GOOD.

JohnnyNemesis
11-25-2005, 07:41 AM
haha! shaggy-shaggy? Damn you're cute!

Let's do it on yay's parents bed.

JoY
11-25-2005, 07:54 AM
let's do so. *winknudge*

<3

oh by the way, care for some Monopoly? don't tell me you're too busy again, because I make a great excuse to run away from any other activities.

Endymion
12-04-2005, 09:52 AM
The big Vagina will eat you with its teeth and then digest you.
http://www.csulb.edu/~rjames/classic/1133672248710.jpg

Nina
12-04-2005, 09:55 AM
JEEZ.
I hardly ever find the female genitalia gross, but this image surely is.
ewewew.

Endymion
12-04-2005, 09:57 AM
that's because girl junk is ivil.

the_GoDdEsS
12-04-2005, 10:03 AM
Aahahahahaha. Uuuugh.

TheUnholyNightbringer
12-04-2005, 10:03 AM
He showed it me on MSN. I died of laughter.

Vera
12-04-2005, 10:05 AM
All genitalia is ugly. IMO, that's actually not too bad looking as genitalia goes. Probably because it's drawn.