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View Full Version : I killed a goddamn mosquito.



Izie
12-12-2005, 03:35 AM
By clapping my hands. I caught the fucker while he was flying, HA. Now he's squirming around on my keyboard, I guess he's not dead after all. Resistant little idiots.

I agree with this: "breeding a mosquito that would only hatch in January so that "the little buggers will freeze to death"".

And the point of this topic is sharing mosquito-hatred. And the fact that I'm cool because I can kill a mosquito with a handclap.

Tizzalicious
12-12-2005, 03:37 AM
Haha, I've done that a couple of times too. Killing mosquitos barehanded is teh shit.

the_GoDdEsS
12-12-2005, 03:37 AM
Hahaha. And what the fuck? Mosquitos in December? I usually indulge in killing insects.

Izie
12-12-2005, 03:38 AM
Unless I've missed something, mosquitos ARE insects.

Have YOU had too much irish cream in your coffee this morning Sim?

Lolz Tizz, we're übercool

Tizzalicious
12-12-2005, 03:42 AM
We really are.

Drunk Iz, lolz.

Izie
12-12-2005, 03:44 AM
Drunk? As if you don't know what I'm like when drunk. This is nothing.

HornyPope
12-12-2005, 03:45 AM
What was this kids story about a tailor who killed seven mosquitos with one clap and then proclaimed himself as a champion and made his own belt with the prhase (paraphrased very roughly) : "when im angry, i kill seven at once".?

JoY
12-12-2005, 03:56 AM
I so thoroughly hate mosquitos, I can't even put it into words. it's a deep rooted hatred that goes back to the early days in my youth, that those little cocksuckers would always attack ME, instead of my brother.

Izie
12-12-2005, 03:58 AM
What was this kids story about a tailor who killed seven mosquitos with one clap and then proclaimed himself as a champion and made his own belt with the prhase (paraphrased very roughly) : "when im angry, i kill seven at once".?

They were flies, not mosquitos :p


I so thoroughly hate mosquitos, I can't even put it into words. it's a deep rooted hatred that goes back to the early days in my youth, that those little cocksuckers would always attack ME, instead of my brother.

...sweet blood we have ;)

JoY
12-12-2005, 04:12 AM
we so do. =)

BUT IT'S NOT FOR MOSQUITOS! grrz.

Izie
12-12-2005, 04:16 AM
Oh I agree. Last winter one bit me and I got an allergic reaction and I was red all over! GRARGH!

wheelchairman
12-12-2005, 06:12 AM
When I was young, I was told two lies about mosquitos.

1. That mosquitos don't like adults.
2. And that my mother often told the mosquitos which room was mine.

wtf?

Tizzalicious
12-12-2005, 06:13 AM
Hahaha. Your mom talks to mosquitos.

They never bite me. I guess I taste bad :(

wheelchairman
12-12-2005, 06:16 AM
Hahaha. Your mom talks to mosquitos.

They never bite me. I guess I taste bad :(
I'm sure Hanson was enough to drive them away. My God, Mosquitos have better taste than you!

Tizzalicious
12-12-2005, 06:18 AM
I'm sure Hanson was enough to drive them away. My God, Mosquitos have better taste than you!

Oooh yes. That must be it.

You suck. My taste is great.

wheelchairman
12-12-2005, 06:19 AM
Oooh yes. That must be it.

You suck. My taste is great.
No, MY taste is great. Yours is terrible.

Tizzalicious
12-12-2005, 06:20 AM
Tut. You got it all wrong.

wheelchairman
12-12-2005, 06:21 AM
Tut. You got it all wrong.
Tut? :p <3

and no I don't. However I bite you enough to make up for the mosquitos. Or do I need to host that pic again?

Tizzalicious
12-12-2005, 06:22 AM
wheelchairmanisMYmosquito.

And no please!

My sister saw that on my site (I just copied the code from LJ, so it was there) and she was all: Eeeewwww!!!

Also at the kissypics. Calling it porn. WTF?

wheelchairman
12-12-2005, 06:24 AM
wheelchairmanisMYmosquito.

And no please!

My sister saw that on my site (I just copied the code from LJ, so it was there) and she was all: Eeeewwww!!!

Also at the kissypics. Calling it porn. WTF?
hahaha, so I got the beautiful one, AND the smart one. score!

Tizzalicious
12-12-2005, 06:24 AM
She's not ugly!

But a prude I guess. Damn. "Eeewww, why would you post that? That's sick!"

wheelchairman
12-12-2005, 06:28 AM
Ugly and dumb.

Hot and smart.

I win!

Tizzalicious
12-12-2005, 06:29 AM
I knew you were cheating on me :(

wheelchairman
12-12-2005, 06:30 AM
I knew you were cheating on me :(
Why would I cheat on the hot and pretty one?

Tizzalicious
12-12-2005, 06:31 AM
Suckup <333 (less than nine)

wheelchairman
12-12-2005, 06:34 AM
Florida is the suck that way. Did you ever get the "killer bees"?

wheelchairman
12-12-2005, 06:40 AM
The bites never bothered me. Being the paranoid and germaphobic person I am though, I've always considered the risk of disease spread this way. Then again I never actually cared.

Nina
12-12-2005, 07:32 AM
We have mosquitos everywhere. I don't mean to brag, but it's gotten to the point that I can catch them with one hand, and then sort of hold them half crippled and carry them to a sink so that I don't splatter them and get blood all over my palm.

I apologize for being a girly girl but damn, that's gross.
Killing the fuckers with your hand grosses me out in general.
eeewww.

Vera
12-12-2005, 07:36 AM
Are mosquitos in central Europe larger than in here? Becaue in here they're not really big enough to be gross to kill with hands. Certainly I'll wash my hand afterwards but it's not really that big of a deal. If the option is killing it bare-handed or getting an itchy mosquito bite, I'll kill it.

Nina
12-12-2005, 07:39 AM
Well, I always just choose to hit it with something? Works wonders and doesn't make me have dirt on my hands...and is definitely not as gross!
The mosquitos I've seen a fucking HUGE ugly disgusting things. Seriously. My god, ew.

T-6005
12-12-2005, 08:20 AM
This thread reminds me of 7th grade - I'd gotten good enough with a rubber band to be able to kill one if I saw it set down somewhere. It was a cool skill.

Although I usually killed them bare-handed, I did throw a textbook at one once, just to see what would happen.

And I'm lucky I live in Canada - not too many insects in the winter. It might be extremely unmanly of me to say, but insects scare the absolute living shit out of me - with the exception of mosquitoes and flies. And I'm serious about that. I have serious difficulties handling butterflies. As for a Taiwanese grasshopper (those fuckers come as big as your hand, I'm not kidding), I'd flip.

The worst, however, are cockroaches half again the size of your thumb that can fly...UGH. And I so just shivered at that thought.

JoY
12-12-2005, 08:23 AM
ur so unmanly, lolz. :p ;p

those grasshoppers totally freak me out too, by the way. & wasps. childhood-wasp-traumas are to blame. as for cockroaches? they fucking disgust me. especially the sound if you crush one. that must be the most sickening, nausiating sound on planet Earth.

I'm shivering uncontrolably now. brr.

T-6005
12-12-2005, 08:26 AM
Haha, I'm totally shivering in counterpoint. Ugh - crushing a cockroach. I can barely touch a dead one even while holding masses of toilet paper, let alone bring myself to step on a live one. I usually approach them with a huge can of insecticide and bury them in the stuff, then run away until they die.

And about the wasp thing - every summer when I go to France, our house ends up having a massive nest of this type of huge, badass wasp. Or are the big ones hornets or something? I don't know - I just know that all the stories about how few stings from those things it takes to die make it hard to kill one when all you've got is a dishtowel.

I'd much rather be unmanly, thank you.

JoY
12-12-2005, 08:45 AM
yes yes, be female with me.

oh god, I do think you meant hornets. they're massive & don't have that black-yellow pattern, but are mainly brown/black-ish. a sting from them could totally cause a Bella-panic attack, I'm sure. they're supposed to hurt so much. but you know what it is? I'm not such a pussy when it comes to pain. but when it comes to the sting of an insect; EW.

we had a giant wasp nest twice here in the Netherlands & once a nest with big ass bees. bees are kind of cute. one once stung me. I remember I cried, because the bee died. :( & it was my own fault that it stung me. aw.

in Switzerland however we get these nests under our roof with very unfriendly, uncute bees. fuck-ing scary. & massive, giant, super-ants. we had them crawling through the whole house. I thought I was going bazerk, because I don't mind ants at all normally, but in great amounts.. I'm not so keen on them.

Sunny
12-12-2005, 08:50 AM
this thread is making me queasy.

hate bugs. mosquitos, hornets, wasps, ants, the whole deal. ugh ugh ugh. >_<

T-6005
12-12-2005, 08:51 AM
yes yes, be female with me.

oh god, I do think you meant hornets. they're massive & don't have that black-yellow pattern, but are mainly brown/black-ish. a sting from them could totally cause a Bella-panic attack, I'm sure. they're supposed to hurt so much. but you know what it is? I'm not such a pussy when it comes to pain. but when it comes to the sting of an insect; EW.

we had a giant wasp nest twice here in the Netherlands & once a nest with big ass bees. bees are kind of cute. one once stung me. I remember I cried, because the bee died. :( & it was my own fault that it stung me. aw.

in Switzerland however we get these nests under our roof with very unfriendly, uncute bees. fuck-ing scary. & massive, giant, super-ants. we had them crawling through the whole house. I thought I was going bazerk, because I don't mind ants at all normally, but in great amounts.. I'm not so keen on them.

Hornets freak me out. I've never seen anyone get stung by them, but most of my family lives around them year-round, so I take my cue from them... and when everyone flips out during dinner, I know there's a good reason.

Bees I'm not so keen on either, but can live with. Wasps freak me out, obviously.

I can take ants, though - even big scary ones, unless there are thousands. Then I'd pretty much rather not.

I think I can pinpoint where my fears of insects comes from - a 6th grade science project where I had to kill insects and mount them. I went out to hunt bugs in Taiwan (where they are huge and fucking badass) and came back a chastised and terrified boy.

Needless to say, I got an F.

JoY
12-12-2005, 09:16 AM
*giggles* aw, poor tiny you.

I pretty much know where most of my bug-phobias come from too. (well, that was a rather strong expression. let's just call it disgust)
wasps; I was in France, being a cute, little Bella (I was like, 6/7 years old?) & I had an itch in my neck. so I tried to rub it away with my shoulder. guess what the itch was? yeah. & it stung me RIGHT where I was operated only weeks before for meningitis. thanks, asshole. the rest of the vacation (& my life, by the way) they've chased me around to everywhere I went to avoid them. if I saw one, I would just panic so much. those fuckers got to like that, panicing blonde girls, because they always come after me like I'm a honey-jar.

ants & the like; when I was little.. I used to squish them. between my fingers. obviously I grew up & found out that's one fuckingly disgusting habit. in fact, it disgusted me so much, I now get all squeasy thinking of the little crawlers. but ants aren't really a problem for me either. it's the massive amount in which they always come when I encounter them. red ants, by the way, DO make me shiver. (well, kind of) even one.

cockroaches; one time, in Zimbabwe, we went to ruins. you know, very old buildings, fallen apart? anyway, they were amazing & just looking at how precise they'd made it. every stone used to fit on the other with a perfection that was stunning. so I was looking at two stones from up close, to see how they'd done it, how they'd made the stones in that way. I'm looking.. I'm looking.. & I'm real close, with my nose almost against the stones.. & suddenly a MASSIVE cockroach comes from the gap between the stones, almost walking INTO MY FACE. & with the sound those fuckers make. wah..! thinking back, I don't know how I survived that experience.

T-6005
12-12-2005, 09:22 AM
cockroaches; one time, in Zimbabwe, we went to ruins. you know, very old buildings, fallen apart? anyway, they were amazing & just looking at how precise they'd made it. every stone used to fit on the other with a perfection that was stunning. so I was looking at two stones from up close, to see how they'd done it, how they'd made the stones in that way. I'm looking.. I'm looking.. & I'm real close, with my nose almost against the stones.. & suddenly a MASSIVE cockroach comes from the gap between the stones, almost walking INTO MY FACE. & with the sound those fuckers make. wah..! thinking back, I don't know how I survived that experience.
I've no idea either. I'd have had a heart attack and died on the spot.

My worst bug experiences are waking up in the morning to find one in my room. The worst were finding massive spiders on my wall (bugs, arachnids, samedif blabla) and having to try and get rid of them.

Although I did find a butterfly in my room in malaysia once. Long and tough was the battle, but I eventually got it outside (let it be noted that I did freak 2 or 3 times on the way).

JoY
12-12-2005, 09:27 AM
oh noes, I love butterflies. I always free them from the house by folding my hands very losely around them. they're beautifull, pretty, pretty things. but I'm always scared to scar their wings, so if one starts flapping like crazy, I always let it go in some weird kind of shock. even nightbutterflies, which are basically moths, are totally my best friends.

over the years, though, I must say I'm much more "eeee" about this whole subject. even butterflies. it's weird how when I was little nothing was scary & suddenly now I'm older so many things are.

Italia311
12-12-2005, 09:30 AM
Damn, what I would give to kill a Mosquito right now...

The signs of summer time...*sigh*

JoY
12-12-2005, 09:31 AM
adding to my post; the situation is even stranger. when I was little, big things scared me. now I'm big, little things scare me? it doesn't make any sense, but why does it work that way?

Izie
12-12-2005, 10:58 AM
We have mosquitos everywhere. I don't mean to brag, but it's gotten to the point that I can catch them with one hand, and then sort of hold them half crippled and carry them to a sink so that I don't splatter them and get blood all over my palm.

That's brilliant bahahahaha

The rest of you, ew ew ew stop descibing bugs and similar things. It's GROSS :(:(:(

Megs
12-12-2005, 11:44 AM
Meh. the bastards always get me on holiday, and i get angry red bumps on my arms. (the only part exposed when i sleep)

its one fine day
12-12-2005, 11:57 AM
i swat wasps by clapping my hands. i give them 3 chances to leave me alone, but after that they're dead

the_GoDdEsS
12-12-2005, 12:31 PM
Nothing beats a wasp stinging you in your boob twice.

Megs
12-12-2005, 12:32 PM
ouch. i've been stung by a bee, that's annoying, because the tail gets stuck in you and you end up having to dig it out :(

Italia311
12-12-2005, 12:32 PM
Nothing beats a wasp stinging you in your boob twice.


Lol..oh God that must have been painfull.

I was driving a truck at work once and a bee flew up my shirt...and stung me twice in the stomach. That fuckin killed.

its one fine day
12-12-2005, 12:33 PM
2 bees got up my trouser leg and down my shirt which is quite painful

the_GoDdEsS
12-12-2005, 12:33 PM
Lol..oh God that must have been painfull.


Oh hell yeah. And I was at work too. But I just took it like a man, grit my teeth together and suffered for three hours.

Megs
12-12-2005, 12:34 PM
both bees and wasps scare me shitless. i'll run away for a mile screaming like a little girl if i see one flying near me. :o

its one fine day
12-12-2005, 12:34 PM
ouch. you could have gone home for a little bit at leaest couldn't you?

the_GoDdEsS
12-12-2005, 12:36 PM
ouch. you could have gone home for a little bit at leaest couldn't you?

Pfft, what am I? A wimp?

its one fine day
12-12-2005, 12:36 PM
well, i dunno. are you? :confused:

Megs
12-12-2005, 12:39 PM
probably part of the "poison"

its one fine day
12-12-2005, 12:39 PM
i'm not actually allergic to anything i know of... :D

Megs
12-12-2005, 12:40 PM
it's cream soda for me. which is really ghey, because i love the stuff, but every time i drink it, i get a more violent reaction

its one fine day
12-12-2005, 12:41 PM
lol ive heard of people allergic to plasters

Italia311
12-12-2005, 12:44 PM
Oh hell yeah. And I was at work too. But I just took it like a man, grit my teeth together and suffered for three hours.


I would have saidso many swear words, as I did when I was stung. That was only my stomach, imagine it was a sensitive area like you...HOLY.

the_GoDdEsS
12-12-2005, 12:45 PM
I would have saidso many swear words, as I did when I was stung.

I did. =P That stuff can be relieving.

Italia311
12-12-2005, 12:46 PM
I did. =P That stuff can be relieving.


Ahhh yes...the verbal medicine...

Megs
12-12-2005, 12:47 PM
apparently lemon juice is the "natural" remedy

the_GoDdEsS
12-12-2005, 12:49 PM
Ahhh yes...the verbal medicine...

Haha, verbal medicine. Gotta love that term.

Italia311
12-12-2005, 12:55 PM
lol..its so true though...

:)

the_GoDdEsS
12-12-2005, 12:56 PM
Yes, I wholeheartedly agree. For years I refused to use bad words until I just gave up. It really does help when you need to relieve.

Megs
12-12-2005, 12:57 PM
that's the thing. over the year's i've cried less and sworn more. yup, my life's good.

the_GoDdEsS
12-12-2005, 12:58 PM
that's the thing. over the year's i've cried less and sworn more. yup, my life's good.

I cry like, never? I relieve anger, not sadness. Usually.

Italia311
12-12-2005, 01:00 PM
LOL...

I swear alot...I must say. I do. Swear in English, in Italian when im to scared to say things to ppl face and pretend it never happend...

Woah...did I just say that????

Edit: swear words get the point accross. Regardless.

Megs
12-12-2005, 01:01 PM
that's what i'm saying. when i was like 7 i used to cry if i fell over or something, and my leg started bleeding. nowadays i'd just say "aww shit. look what it did to my trousers" i remember the one time i really fucked up my leg, however, i was more concerned about my ripped trouser knee.

the_GoDdEsS
12-12-2005, 01:01 PM
Funnily enough I started swearing in English excessively a few years back and after that I started swearing in Slovak.

Italia311
12-12-2005, 01:02 PM
When I was younger...I would swear in English and my parents would punish me.

But when I swore in Italian they laughed!!! LOL...

"whatta cute little kid..." Ya know? its funny...

Megs
12-12-2005, 01:03 PM
i love swearing in other languages. it's so funny. no idea why i find it funny, it just is.

the_GoDdEsS
12-12-2005, 01:05 PM
Swearing in another language is easier. You just care less.

Hahaha, they let you swear in Italian? *giggles* Oh, which language is your first? Or are you bilingual?

Italia311
12-12-2005, 01:06 PM
Well..I guess its all relative to place. Its the opposite when I'm in Italy...

Italian is my first. English I have come AAAAAAALLLLONNNNNNGGGG way.

Writing in Italian I am far from perfect having never attending school in Italy...but I manage. and when I was learning english..holy shit...worst time of my life.

I remember being in summer school...learning how to write, how to read..I wanted to DIE!!!! But, now I can write full essays in english...<---im typing!! lol..im good. Ive been in Canada for some time now...

I think my parents have a fascination with swearing. My bro was born here...and my mom would tell him to swear...in english and my Zia and Mom would laugh...I dlnt get it...oh well. It is funny when a kid swears...I have to admit.