View Full Version : Okay so back on my Hyperboreans

04-05-2006, 01:07 PM
. .

04-10-2006, 04:37 PM
I got up to "Chapter the first" and stopped because I never read anything so ridiculously pretentious that it feels it has to introduce itself as "chapter the first".

Sin Studly
04-14-2006, 08:08 AM
To call this 'shit' would be an insult to everybody who eats.

All About Eve
04-14-2006, 08:10 AM
Did you really have to convey your feelings to me? How can you assume that I would write anything to please your lordship? Obviously if you're incapable of grasping such humour & light-heartedness as I displayed on writing "Chapter the Xth", then my work wasn't destined to you, & you had no business shoving your snotty nose in it.

So there.

If you had specific people you cared about reading it, then, why not just send it to them?

04-14-2006, 08:11 AM
Because she's obviously a sadist.

Sin Studly
04-14-2006, 08:15 AM
How about you just make us all promise to stick pins through our eyeballs instead? You'll get the same result for a lot less effort.

04-14-2006, 01:41 PM
Haven't you realized yet that no one is remotely interested in this?

04-14-2006, 01:52 PM
Haven't you realized yet that no one is remotely interested in this?
Oh good, I thought I was the only one, but I didn't want to say anything.

04-14-2006, 01:54 PM
I didn't want to say anything before.

Sin Studly
04-15-2006, 02:19 AM
Actually, FauxElitist quite enjoyed it.

04-15-2006, 02:39 AM
I am just amazed that the English language can survive after such a beating.

Sin Studly
04-15-2006, 03:15 AM
You've said this before, you're not writing it for us. So why the fuck are you posting it. Nobody here cares, nobody wants to read it. It's an affront to the English fucking language.

04-15-2006, 03:17 AM
Considered posting it somewhere that it may be appreciated (http://www.downsyn.com/forum/index.php)?

Sin Studly
04-15-2006, 03:28 AM
Why are you posting it here? Nobody likes it. Nobody wants to read more. Nobody thinks you have an ounce of talent.

04-15-2006, 03:34 AM
It's not really writing, though, is it? It's more like eating a bowl full of alphabits and then projectile vomitting onto a page.

Sin Studly
04-15-2006, 03:36 AM
Call it delusion, but I enjoy writing.

Terrific. Write. Just don't showcase your work.

04-15-2006, 03:43 AM
Half an ounce. Thirty milliliters. Two tablespoons or six teaspoons till your heart thumps 1 2 -- a silver hammer resounding in your chest.

Ears thrum to the 1 2 beat of choked blood danced through worndown veins ; slow and rhythmic and thudding with every measured breath -- eyes narrowed, throat scratching for that next gasp.

So breathe deep. Feel your tongue flap wildly around the inside of your mouth -- stretch it wide and lap for air. Try with every sucked breath to draw the gasp toward the back of your throat ; to cool the prickly sting broiling your cheeks. Feel your nostrils flare like fire and ice, every inhalation freezing your sinuses as the air shudders through your lungs -- the burn spreading through your face, lips curled back in a rictus whine. Feel your sight stung raw ; every gust of wind chill on the surface of your slitted wet squinty eyes.

Half an ounce. Thirty milliliters. Two tablespoons or six teaspoons of Firewater -- that's what they call 100 proof 'Cinnamon Schnapped' paint thinner. Half an ounce. Thirty milliliters. Two tablespoons or six teaspoons of Bacardi 151 -- that's what they call liquid death.

Flame it and Suck it down.

It's called the Dragon's Breath -- the quickest end to troubling thoughts and the surest flight from feeling. Amber as ambrosia and twice as divine. Dark hued as dusk. As compelling as dawn.
When you hold it up to the light you bring the world into focus -- watching as the little blue flame scratches at the glass.

You take a deep breath and blow.

Make a wish and close your eyes -- feel the hopeful air brush out the flame and then suck the drink back -- letting purification sear through you.

Flaming. Searing. Amnesia.


The above is a descriptive excerpt from my current novella.

It's structured in a new style that I am attempting, amalgamating my old classical style with minimalist writing.

If you're a writer, then dead authors everywhere are currently corkscrewing their way to the center of the Earth.

Sin Studly
04-15-2006, 04:05 AM
Why are you so talentless, Maria?

Sin Studly
04-15-2006, 04:29 AM
This isn't piano. Don't post it here, you talentless whore.

04-15-2006, 04:36 AM
Maybe this is just an attempt at extortion ; something like :

'Give me affirmation or I won't stop posting my stories!'

Maria! We do not deal with terrorists!!!

... especially ugly ones.

Sin Studly
04-15-2006, 05:52 AM
You've always been ugly, you've always been talentless.