PDA

View Full Version : The Mota Boy Guide to Studying for Finals



Mota Boy
04-27-2006, 12:55 PM
This is for all of you on the board who are going to go to college, and are a bit nervous about the prospect of final exams. To help you along, I've written a comprehensive study guide to surviving finals week.

11:15 - Wake up! Be sure to get up early to get plenty of time in to study

11:20 - Take a quick shower

11:25 - Check e-mail, dick around on computer

12:30 - Alright, let's go study! Make sure you have everything you need - organization is the key to good study habits!

12:45 - Call up the bar you went to last night to see if they're open and are cool with you stopping by to pick up your debit card and pay your tab now

12:46 - Get an answering machine

1:00 - Go to the bank to get some money

1:20 - Go to a coffee shop across town to study

1:30 - But first grab a sandwich

1:50 - All right, you're finally ready to study! Get some coffee and pull out your computer. Get ready to start writing your study guide. But first check your e-mail

1:52 - Get e-mail from your professor, find out that exam is at 9 a.m. tomorrow. 40% of exam is ID, 60% is composed of two essays

2:15 - All right! Now to hit the books!

2:16 - Realize that you've forgotten your textbook

2:17 - Dick around on the internet a bit

4:00 - Decide to head back to your dorm and pick up your textbook

4:23 - Get back to your dorm. Check e-mail

6:00 - OK, time to start. But first answer the door. Yeah, sure, you can help some girls move at 7:30. You'll practically be done by then

6:05 - Watch the Simpsons

6:30 - Watch The Daily Show

6:55 - All right! Time to start writing the study guide!

7:26 - Fuck, the girls are here. Go help them move. After all, they only have a few boxes and they only have to go across the quad

8:24 - Well, that was easy. All right! Time to start!

9:00 - Shit, better go get some dinner before the restaurants close

9:11 - Stop by grocery store for beer and cheap sushi

9:26 - Stop by Subway

9:40 - Eat sub, check BBS

10:00 - All right! Time to keep going!

11:00 - Shit, this is taking a lot longer than I'd thought

12:00 - You've reached the halfway point! Kinda. Better take a break to finish up one of the required books

12:30 - OK, back to the computer. Time to finish up the study guide. But first check facebook.

1:00 - All right, time to finish up the study guide

1:45 - Check to see if collegehumor has any new videos

2:58 - Holy fuck, it's almost three a.m. Why are you still bothering to use entire sentences when sentence fragments will do? Just write as fast as possible!

3:17 - Check e-mail

4:00 - Done! You've finally parsed through half a semester's worth of reading you didn't do and come up with roughly a paragraph for each of the 60 IDs. Take a well-deserved break with some sushi, a beer and the Daily Show.

4:37 - Space out a bit

5:13 - Oh shit, dawn! Gotta study!

5:41 - OK, you've gone over seven or so IDs. Better at least glance at the other required book

5:43 - Wait, where is it?

5:48 - No, seriously, where the fuck is it?

5:54 - Oh shit

5:57 - Take a break to go park your car legally, gather your thoughts

6:12 - You are so fucked

6:14 - Wait, maybe the book's on Sparknotes. Maybe someone's written a study guide to a little-known scholarly look at Western history

6:15 - Yeah, you didn't think so

6:15 - Maybe there's a detailed review on Amazon

6:15 - Hey, they have pages of the book scanned!

6:16 - Damn, just the first six.

6:16 - Wait, there's a feature that lets you jump around to random pages, but only six at a time...

6:16 - Read assigned chapters of book, six random pages at a time.

6:43 - Damn, apparently you can only do it fifty times or so. Well, I think I know what was going on...

6:44 - Start going over study guide

7:57 - Stop for a minute to check BBS

8:50 - Brush teeth and walk to class

8:55 - Read up on those final two IDs on the way over

9:02 - Arrive late, start exam

10:03 - You're going too slow, just start writing and think up a thesis later

11:15 - What the hell, use "fuck" in one of your essays

12:00 - DONE!

12:15 - Take a quick shower

12:30 - Crash, repeat

Vera
04-27-2006, 01:45 PM
This is so my life, except my exam isn't until June but let me put it this way: I am so not getting into Uni this year. So so not.

Little_Miss_1565
04-27-2006, 02:23 PM
Yay for no exams, only papers. :D

Nina
04-27-2006, 02:28 PM
without sleep?
it's 10:30pm now and I'm about to go to BED.

Rinoa
04-27-2006, 02:40 PM
I survived my college days on beer and parties. Can't say I was too enthusiastic about putting any effort in to pass though.

Mota Boy
04-27-2006, 02:57 PM
This is so my life, except my exam isn't until June but let me put it this way: I am so not getting into Uni this year. So so not.Pshaw.

Yeah, Nina without sleep. It's 3:58 here and I'm still going strong, though I admit I'm a bit perplexed at how quickly time is slipping into the future. I'm debating whether or not I should drive on the interstate later tonight. Fortunately it's rush hour so I get to delay the decision.

And Sarah - God knows that with how badly I've been at writing papers in a timely manner lately, it would've taken even longer, only with a much greater emphasis at sitting at the computer and being frustrated. Last time I had to write a four to six page paper I pulled an all-nighter and didn't finish until three p.m. I am so out of the game.

Sunny
04-27-2006, 03:32 PM
yo, that sounds like my life. except, well, due to the nature of my studies, i could add a few points.. such as "send work to kinkos, find out kinkos screwed it up, go throw a hissy fit at kinkos, cut finger with x-acto blade, bleed all over final project 30 minutes before class"... etc.

i <3 finals! LOL FOR REALZ!

..sleep deprived. peep.

Preocupado
04-27-2006, 03:39 PM
well that sounds like reality to me. LOL at reality.

Endymion
04-27-2006, 09:45 PM
am i the only one that doesn't study for anything?

All About Eve
04-27-2006, 09:49 PM
No. I've studied for like, two tests this whole year.

Tizzalicious
04-27-2006, 11:02 PM
You sound like me, except I'd go to bed without the studying.

JohnnyNemesis
04-27-2006, 11:09 PM
This is EXACTLY what I do...except I don't count what I do as studying since I barely get anything done.

Betty
04-27-2006, 11:22 PM
Sounds ALL too familiar.

Mmm... my best exam this year:

12 AM : Realize you are fucked beyond belief. Goal now lowered to 50 %.

1 AM: Go on MSN for comfort to keep from shooting yourself. Have super sweet friends cheer you up in your moment of desperation with words of encouragement and inspiration on how best to write ridiculous answers to questions on the final (yet likely still not receive credit).

3 AM: Goal now lowered to 30 %. Housemate explains that you should not call it a "goal" if it is lower than a pass. Fine. He also suggests a beer to calm the nerves. Don't have to twist my arm on that one.

4 AM: Studying now aided by beer.

5:30 AM: More alcohol seems to be required. Also caffeine. Solution: Super strong coffee with copious amounts of Bailey's.

7:30 AM: More coffee and Bailey's. Massive alcohol-caffeine body buzz begins to set in. Oh, also need Ibuprofen for the headache. Mmm... more drugs.

8:00 AM: Walk to school blaring Social Distortion at full volume.

8:30 AM: Fuck am I BUZZING. I am gonna smoke this exam! Write out answers to the couple questions I DO know as if I were on speed. Look around at everybody else "thinking". Fill in BS for as many questions as possible.

10:30 AM: Go visit boys at the lab as I am still BUZZING. It is suggested that we go to the Grad Lounge for pitchers when it opens at 11:30. I'm game.

12:30 PM: Drink two pitchers and eat antijitos and quesadillas.

2:30 PM: Crashing, BIG TIME. Stumble home. Pass out.

(Now I don't have my AMs and PMs confused.)

Jebus
04-27-2006, 11:56 PM
That's pretty much what I do(but different) and I'm in freaken high school. College scares me now.

Vera
04-28-2006, 12:14 AM
I wish these stories would end with inspirational "passed with 80%!" type of solutions.

Endymion
04-28-2006, 12:22 AM
my shit:

do any of the following: sleep, eat, dick around on the computer, hang out with friends, watch dvds.
take the exam.
sit back and relax.

i love being stress-free. i'm taoist i guess. que sera sera. i either know the stuff or i don't, and going in cold gives a much better representation of my actual ability than if i spend the previous few hours with my nose in the text book.

WebDudette
04-28-2006, 12:24 AM
Change hours to days finals to school year and add "I passed with a 70%-80%" and that's my life story.

Betty
04-28-2006, 12:45 AM
Ryan, that's because you're a genius.

Sanni, let's cross our fingers that that is the ending to my story.

Mota Boy
04-28-2006, 12:54 AM
I wish these stories would end with inspirational "passed with 80%!" type of solutions.
Oh, I think I got an A. If I hadn't skipped a few classes (thus lowering the ol' participation grade) and turned in one paper a day late (automatically taking off five points), I'd be certain of getting an A in the class. Now I'm just pretty sure I'll get an A based upon track record, but I'm not discounting the possibility of having to take an A-. I can't remember exactly how many classes I've skipped, and I don't know if the fact that the teacher is a friend of mine and knows I know my shit will help me out at all.

For you foreigners, an "A" is a 93-100, an "A-" ia a 90 to a 92.


Endy - it helps that you are in a discipline that relies much more on logic than on knowledge of specific events. I've had some courses where I knew the final exam would be all essay where my "studying" was me drinking a bit while explaining the course to a friend also taking the class. However, I can't expect to do well on an exam where I'm required to know Patricia Limerick's thesis on the role of myth and the role of minorities in the West if I haven't read her book, or correctly ID A. Phillip Randolph, give his time frame, list two facts about him (founded the Brotherhood of Sleeping Car Porters in 1925; came up with idea for march on Washington in order to integrate industries supplying the war effort; received Presidential Medal of Freedom in 1964 from Lyndon B. Johnson) and bullshit his significance to American history without at least reading up on him.

I know some people majoring in economics that just have a gift in it that smoke pot all day and get A's. When I'm taking, say, a Chinese exam, though, I've gotta put in some serious hours to know what all those little squiggles mean and make sure I can use 'em to tell the story of buying an apartment or going to the doctor.

Endymion
04-28-2006, 01:01 AM
Ryan, that's because you're a genius.
incorrect.

[edit] and mota, that's why i didn't go into any area like that. my memory sucks major ass.

Betty
04-28-2006, 01:04 AM
One of my problems is that I sleep through class so at some point I actually have to slog through all the notes and/or assigned readings.

Lizardus
04-28-2006, 01:29 AM
I never studied for my finals in hig school, i cheated the fuck out of them.

T-6005
04-28-2006, 03:04 AM
My guide to studying is basically not to.

It's a bad idea. I like to lie to myself and say it's compulsive.

Except I know the terrible, terrible truth.

Sunny
04-28-2006, 09:34 AM
am i the only one that doesn't study for anything?

no, i don't study. i make things last minute... which often results in unintentional self-mutilation (blurry vision + shaky hands + sharp things = :(!)

my only knowledge-based "fill it out" kinda exams are in typography and history of advertising, both of which i could pass while asleep and blindfolded.

Rocky-girl
04-28-2006, 09:59 AM
Cute! BUt I think this way I'll never pass the exam! This year I choose to have an exam on algebra oraly so I bought I book with answers on my topics. On that book was written: Your exam in 24 hours. I learn it till nowadays. Last year I learnt my topics on Society in 3 days that was awful! I DON'T WANT TO HAVE AN EXAMS! It's not funny.

killer_queen
04-28-2006, 10:55 AM
I used to never study exams and get the highest marks until this year. I'm not trying to say I'm so smart (clearly, I'm not). I just can concentrate at the lesson easily and don't miss even a word while listening.

This year everything has changed. I need to study for the university exam and my teachers at the school can't teach anything so I have to learn them all on my own which makes things really hard. Lessons like biology and chemistry is not hard to learn but honestly, I cried while trying to learn integral.

So, to study better I stopped going to school two weeks ago. Now I wake up, study, have a break, study, have break and study... It's gonna work until I go crazy.

Nina
04-28-2006, 11:44 AM
killer_queen, you sound like me.

What baffles me is that everyone who I know who is not from Europe talks like you guys. "I never study, I always gets straight As, I never sleep before an exam, yadda yadda". I dont know if these two are connected, but I have definitely noticed that over the past few years.

You know...my entire grade agrees that without studying you wont graduate in Germany. Maybe they just take things really hard over here. We only have essay type of exams, too. And losts more of them than you guys have (fact). It's a HORRIBLE system. I'd rather study the way you guys do.

Do you only have multiple choice tests? I dont think so but I wanted to ask anyway.

Rocky-girl
04-28-2006, 12:11 PM
I understand you, Gulsah. Well I have a stupid school. It's only a start. From the September in school I learnt integrals and other stuff. And in September I started to study on courses in University. On that courses was not so hard, but than logarifms appeared, in that time I haven't seen it and haven't know anything about it! I learnt it by myself, well that was ok. Than trigs. All my life I loved it but that time I understood that I didn't know it at all! I was shocked! Than problems but that was not so hard. And I want to mention that school didn't help me at all! That stuff that we learn at school is too little to enter uni!

the_GoDdEsS
04-28-2006, 12:18 PM
So, to study better I stopped going to school two weeks ago. Now I wake up, study, have a break, study, have break and study... It's gonna work until I go crazy.

You won't go crazy. But you'll sure hit the verge. I've done that plenty of times. The longest one was 9 weeks, non-stop. Every day, all day long.

Sunny
04-28-2006, 12:20 PM
What baffles me is that everyone who I know who is not from Europe talks like you guys. "I never study, I always gets straight As, I never sleep before an exam, yadda yadda". I dont know if these two are connected, but I have definitely noticed that over the past few years.

You know...my entire grade agrees that without studying you wont graduate in Germany. Maybe they just take things really hard over here. We only have essay type of exams, too. And losts more of them than you guys have (fact). It's a HORRIBLE system. I'd rather study the way you guys do.



it might have to do with the fact that you and Gulsah and Tanya are still in high school... and Mota, Endy and myself are in college.

it seems like *some* American high schools don't make their students memorize as much crap... but some definitely require as much studying as European high schools. if not more. I don't think you can graduate from a good high school without studying here either.

and well, college/university is quite different. not easier, but pulling all-nighters or not studying for a specific subject are quite common.

Rocky-girl
04-28-2006, 12:25 PM
I don't think you can graduate from a good high school without studying here either.
If you want to graduate from school with good marks you must study anyway it easier than to enter uni. Nobody wants you to stay at school, so you left school but would you be able to enter the uni? That's the main question.

Rag Doll
04-28-2006, 04:18 PM
I have one class where I still haven't opened the books all semester, I rarely go, and when I do go...I tend to either sleep or get in some huge debate that doesn't relate to the class. I totally aced the midterm and plan to do the same on the final. Yay getting to sell back books that are still in the plastic wrap. I <3 Politics&Media. The only class I studied for this semester is Constitutional Law....and it was pretty similar to the scenario Claibe laid out. Except it was all court cases. Tons and tons and tons of court cases and decisions.

Lizardus
04-28-2006, 04:26 PM
I had a class like that, it was a blast.
Jokes where flying and you where allowed to drink in class if you had enough for everyone.

Mota Boy
04-29-2006, 02:53 AM
So, I was out at a karaoke bar with friends and friends of friends tonight, when one of the fof's asked me if I'd be around this area for May. I mentioned that I would. She said "Awesome, we're going to a music festival on the fifth, next Friday! Wanna come?"

It took my alcohol-soaked brain a moment to process this information.


"Wait, the fifth is on a Friday?"

"Yeah! Are you free?"

"Yes... I guess I am. That means the fourth is on a Thursday, right?"

"Yeah..."

"Shit."

Well, it turns out the fourth is on a Thursday. I thought it was on a Friday, maybe even a Saturday. Basically, I thought I'd have three days to study between my exam on Monday and my exams on the 3rd and 4th. Oh well, it turns out I'll just have one instead. One day to get a semester's worth of accounting and a semester's worth of Chinese down cold... after staying up all night two days prior to learn a semester's worth of geology.




















Fuck

T-6005
04-29-2006, 03:18 AM
Ah, Chinese.

I feel for you, man. I really, really do.

Mota Boy
04-29-2006, 03:38 AM
你不知道, 朋友.



Hahaha, my message is too short.

JoY
05-01-2006, 11:27 AM
I've tried to follow these guide lines exactly for my last exam (which was today) & I came to the conclusion that this doesn't work.

the_GoDdEsS
05-01-2006, 12:52 PM
I'd have killed myself doing that. I always planned studying in advance. Printed out a calendar with all the days and tried to organise it into days and realistically guessed how long it will take me to study for which exam. I could never study all night. Ever.

Rocky-girl
05-01-2006, 09:29 PM
Why? I like studying at night. Everybody sleeps only you're sitting and learning your subject. Nice. But than it too hard to woke up...

HornyPope
05-02-2006, 08:52 AM
You know...my entire grade agrees that without studying you wont graduate in Germany. Maybe they just take things really hard over here. We only have essay type of exams, too. And losts more of them than you guys have (fact). It's a HORRIBLE system. I'd rather study the way you guys do.

Well, do your tests consist of 100% material that was previously covered in class, or do you like study one chapter with the teacher and have another one to do entierly on your own at home?
Because in the former scenario, like it is the case with North American high schools where we study only in class, there is no need to do anything outside of school if you pay attention in class and have a good capacity for memory. Studying could make a difference between a good grade and an average grade--and I don't buy anyone's bullshit that he could ace a grade without studying anything--but it's not like you'll fail. But of course, that depends entierly on your ability to listen and remember.
Math can be perhaps the only exception, at least to most people, because there is so much material and the teacher only conducts several exercises of every example and leaves you to perfection it on your own back home.

Nina
05-02-2006, 11:36 AM
No, we DEFINITELY dont cover up all the stuff in class. We're in fact far, faaarr away from it. Especially in classes like Biology. And...English. And German. And oh my god, History. How could I not name History first? In that (quite important) class we seriously have to learn EVERYTHING at home. The teacher usually talks about soccer during class :(
I guess that explains it.

P.S. I never study at night, either. I stop at 8pm, no matter what.

killer_queen
05-02-2006, 11:46 AM
I can study better at night. Because my house rarely gets quiet. And I feel like studying only nights. You know, there's nothing to do, no one is calling you to go out...

Nina
05-02-2006, 11:48 AM
But arent you simply....tired?
I know that after 8, I just want to watch TV for an hour (two hours if it's a movie) and then go on the net/read/sleep.

killer_queen
05-02-2006, 11:50 AM
Studying when I'm tired is better for me. Otherwise I can't sit on my chair, I want to walk, run, jump and all that crap.

JoY
05-02-2006, 03:45 PM
I can study better at night. Because my house rarely gets quiet. And I feel like studying only nights. You know, there's nothing to do, no one is calling you to go out...
exactly. plus the time of the day I feel most awake is at night. I know, my dayrhythm is absolutely fucked, but I can't help it. even if I go to bed at ten & get up at seven every single day, I'll still ly awake till at least one AM & feel dropdeadtired in the morning. I just can't get up & I can't get out of bed, fin.

& that about being able to sit still & just study, also works for me.

TheUnholyNightbringer
05-02-2006, 03:45 PM
I'm like that. I can't fall asleep until at LEAST 3am. Even if I got up at 7am that morning.

Nina
05-03-2006, 05:19 AM
It amazes me to be utterly and COMPLETELY different to the rest of you. o.0

T-6005
05-03-2006, 05:21 AM
I generally stay awake until 3 or 4 in the morning, no matter the time I have class the next day. I can't help it - it's not that I can't fall asleep, just that I end up looking at the clock and it's 3. I didn't really study at that time this year, having a roommate and all, but I probably will next year.

killer_queen
05-03-2006, 05:28 AM
It amazes me to be utterly and COMPLETELY different to the rest of you. o.0
Yeah, weird. Because somehow I always agree with what you say. This is like the first or second, I don't know.

Anyway, I easily get sleepy at 11 pm. That's why I don't study enough but since I'm not going to school I wake up at 10 in the morning so it helps me to stay awake until 2-3. But my teachers say I must get used to study in the morning. Because clearly, morning is the best time for studying and learning. Also I'll take the university exam in the morning. It would be hard for me if I don't get used to it.

Vera
05-03-2006, 06:04 AM
The teacher usually talks about soccer during class :(
I guess that explains it.
Such competence! And the irony that (from what I hear) German schools are strict and you have to call the teachers Herr or Frau last name and siezen and everything, and then they don't even teach you shit. :/

Nicole
05-03-2006, 06:19 AM
How you can take an exam after no sleep is beyond me. My brain starts flaking big time at about 18 hours of being awake. Even after todays 30 hours of staying awake I can't do one task for more than about half an hour. I've got friends that swear by that method but I prefer to study the night before, perk up and then do the exam in a heightened state that works nicely right after a good nights sleep and i remember way more.

Rocky-girl
05-03-2006, 06:26 AM
Nicole, there is one construction: "I must do it". They don't ask me if I want. I must and there are no questions.

Nicole
05-03-2006, 06:33 AM
I'm a little bit confused by what you said, it's a little ambigous. Rephrase?

HisHolinessSatan
05-03-2006, 06:38 AM
French Lit AP tommorow. Who else is excited?

Rocky-girl
05-03-2006, 06:44 AM
I'm a little bit confused by what you said, it's a little ambigous. Rephrase?
Nicole I've said that there are moments when you must learn all you study material because tomorrow you have an exam. And you have only one night. I meant this. Exuse me if I was harsh. This happened to me very often this days.

Nicole
05-03-2006, 06:54 AM
It wasn't harsh just unclear :)

I know, sometimes you just have to. I just know the brain functions better on rest, and therefore you've got a better chance of retaining the information on at least some sleep, which is much better for the exam than feeling fried and not being able to recall as much. I've read that you shouldnt study for an exam the night before (days ok) but knowing nothing is a huge disadvantage.

So not looking forward to my 3 hour human biosciences exam in a few weeks, its worth 60% and I want to keep my high distinction.

Rocky-girl
05-03-2006, 07:01 AM
Thank you, I was afraid that I was harsh. :)
I'm happy person because till May 27,28 I have no exams! I have just little tests to get the year marks. Btu I think that they will be not so easy:( But in this case I've nothing to do.

Nina
05-03-2006, 07:30 AM
Such competence! And the irony that (from what I hear) German schools are strict and you have to call the teachers Herr or Frau last name and siezen and everything, and then they don't even teach you shit. :/

Oh, no wait. My history teacher is not only one of the most competend people I know, but he's also the only person who I can speak of as somebody who knows simply everything. And I am not exaggerating, either.
His methods just arent right for ME because I am quite bad at memorizing stuff (historical dates), and I am also really bad with anything political.
He tends to drift away and talk about soccer because of the world cup. Again, that's annoying to *me* because I'd rather have some historical stuff explained, but people who are good at this subject dont give a damn. We usually end up having to study 30-50pages within a few days, because he wont explain it. blegh.

And....you mean you DONT call your teachers by their last name? Mr/Mrs Something? That would be sttrraaannnggee.

killer_queen
05-03-2006, 08:48 AM
It's weird to call teachers Mr/Mrs something. We just call them "teacher". Or with their first names if we are close.

Vera
05-03-2006, 09:10 AM
Teacher or some equivalent of it, most often. Some teachers have nicknames that we use (that they're okay with themselves) and sometimes we use last names, but just last names, no Mr's or Mrs's. We called our home class teacher by her first name since she was kind of closer to us than all the other teachers.

Mota Boy
05-08-2006, 12:12 AM
I wish these stories would end with inspirational "passed with 80%!" type of solutions.
Wish granted - I got an A in the class. And boom goes the dynamite!

Remember kids - use the Mota method for optimum performance!

Vera
05-08-2006, 12:48 AM
Good on you!

:D!

Tizzalicious
05-08-2006, 12:52 AM
Or maybe Mota Boy is just one lucky bitch.

Vera
05-08-2006, 01:41 AM
Or one genius bitch.

It takes one to know one. But no, seriously, some exams are just that - you have to study - and some you can ace if you were in class at all or have two basic braincells.

Though even for all the studying I don't do, I usually require studying to ace an exam.