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View Full Version : Easy way to freak out the retarded



noodlesfan
07-09-2006, 11:51 PM
Yahoo messenger is full of retards and such, even more retarded than me.
And I, just pwn3d this little girl who wouldn't stop bugging me.



Session Start (moderator00342 :hothottie03301): Mon Jul 10 01:32:50 2006
moderator00342 : Excuse me, but I've been hearing complaints about trying to pry information from a minor. These complaints have been traced back to you
hothottie03301: huh?
moderator00342 : I work for Yahoo inc. and i've been recieving complaints.
hothottie03301: did you accuse me of stealing info?
hothottie03301: what?
hothottie03301: i understand
hothottie03301: but how? i didn't do anything
hothottie03301: i just got on
hothottie03301: i can't believe you
moderator00342 : I have records of the conversation
hothottie03301: so... i didn't do anything, i'm only 13
hothottie03301: and i know this person
moderator00342 : By signing up for Yahoo Free Email, you aggree to subject of terms
hothottie03301: ooooook..........................
moderator00342 : This breaks these terms
hothottie03301: omgosh
hothottie03301: i'm so srry
hothottie03301: i know what happened
hothottie03301: my lil bro
hothottie03301: again
hothottie03301: he's 12
hothottie03301: he does this all the time
hothottie03301: i am sooooooooooooooo sorry
moderator00342 : If there are any more complaints filed in your name, your account will be terminated and your IP address will be tracked
hothottie03301: ok....
hothottie03301: what's that?
hothottie03301: IP address?
moderator00342 : This means, that any account trying to register, or log on using your computer, will fail.
hothottie03301: don't do that, my mom will get really mad
hothottie03301: please don't
hothottie03301: i'm not in the mood of getting grounded
hothottie03301: and both my brothers will get mad
moderator00342 : Please refrain from any more misconduct
hothottie03301: we all use the same computer
hothottie03301: ok
hothottie03301: but this person is my friend
hothottie03301: how did this happen
hothottie03301: i know him
moderator00342 : From what it says in his report, you don't know him
hothottie03301: what?
hothottie03301: this is punkislaw@yahoo.com right?
moderator00342 : And with a good lawyer, he can actually have you on stalking
moderator00342 : Yes
hothottie03301: i know him
hothottie03301: he's my ex-boyfriend's friend
moderator00342 : He says that he doesn't know you
hothottie03301: i know him
hothottie03301: i can't believe this
moderator00342 : Please just stop abusing Yahoo's services.
hothottie03301: i don't do anything but try to talk to an old friend and get accused of this
hothottie03301: i'm not
hothottie03301: i can't believe this
moderator00342 : I have no more to say, I have other matters to attend to, please contact me if you need any questions answered
hothottie03301: why did he do this? can i still talk to him and ask him why he lied?
moderator00342 : Just as long as you don't cause another report on your name
hothottie03301: but what if he lied and changed the words?
hothottie03301: when he sent it to you
moderator00342 : I can see exactly what you wrote to him, it's in our database
hothottie03301: oh
hothottie03301: really?
moderator00342 : Yes
hothottie03301: why does this happen to me? i didn't do anything
hothottie03301: i'm just trying to contact an old friend that probably forgot me
hothottie03301: and i don't want that
moderator00342 : Try to choose your friends a little carefully
hothottie03301: i know this person in real life... that's how i got e-mail addresses
moderator00342 : You've got a little black check next to your name now, if there's any more alegations, you'll be banned.
moderator00342 : do you understand?
hothottie03301: yes sir
Session Close (hothottie03301): Mon Jul 10 01:44:13 2006

Not to mention, anyone with the name "hothottie" needs to be messed with just because of their name.

WebDudette
07-09-2006, 11:58 PM
Or you could have just ignored her :eek: .

Endymion
07-09-2006, 11:58 PM
those people aren't literally retarded.

harassing the actually mentally handicapped is much more entertaining.

noodlesfan
07-09-2006, 11:58 PM
Or you could have just ignored her :eek: .
This is much more entertaining


those people aren't literally retarded.

harassing the actually mentally handicapped is much more entertaining.

13 year olds with "hothottie" for a name count as retarded, and if not retarded, pretty fucking low on the brain power ladder.

Tizzalicious
07-10-2006, 12:00 AM
Not to mention, anyone with the name "hothottie" needs to be messed with just because of their name.

...do you realise your username is "noodlesfan"?

noodlesfan
07-10-2006, 12:03 AM
...do you realise your username is "noodlesfan"?
... maybe i'll make a new name, but it'll be a secret, to destroy the shittiness that comes with this name. We can't all be creative bastards.

All About Eve
07-10-2006, 12:10 AM
Actual mentally retarded guys are fun without teasing them.

Tizzalicious
07-10-2006, 12:11 AM
... maybe i'll make a new name, but it'll be a secret, to destroy the shittiness that comes with this name. We can't all be creative bastards.

I think the shittiness doesn't come with your name, but with your personality.

noodlesfan
07-10-2006, 12:12 AM
I think the shittiness doesn't come with your name, but with your personality.
If you'll notice, i've recently been refraining from my usual flood of retarded posts.

Endymion
07-10-2006, 12:15 AM
Actual mentally retarded guys are fun without teasing them.
oh, i fully agree. the high school i went to was were they sent all the tards in the district. seeing two wheeltards racing down the halls is wonderful. watching a small retard with a jamaican accent chase and beat on a seven foot, four hundred pound retard with a hitler 'stache is something one never wants to forget.

Professor Chaos
07-10-2006, 12:18 AM
I envy Endy's highschool years...

noodlesfan
07-10-2006, 12:19 AM
oh, i fully agree. the high school i went to was were they sent all the tards in the district. seeing two wheeltards racing down the halls is wonderful. watching a small retard with a jamaican accent chase and beat on a seven foot, four hundred pound retard with a hitler 'stache is something one never wants to forget.
YOU went to the highschool where they stuck the retarded kids?

XYlophonetreeZ
07-10-2006, 12:28 AM
oh, i fully agree. the high school i went to was were they sent all the tards in the district. seeing two wheeltards racing down the halls is wonderful. watching a small retard with a jamaican accent chase and beat on a seven foot, four hundred pound retard with a hitler 'stache is something one never wants to forget.
XD, man. X fuckin' D.

Endymion
07-10-2006, 12:41 AM
oh shit guys, i have more retard stories.

you know those half-tards? the guys that are really fucking stupid, but still able to dress themselves? well, somehow my friend dustin (who left us after freshmen year) was really thick as thieves with a couple and he could control them. it was nuts. so anyway, this one time he got a half-tard to pour an entire rice bowl into the pants of the seven foot, hitler 'stached tard. the big tard then went screaming and crying around the school scooping rice out of his underwear and scattering it around the quad.

and then there's the time dustin got one retard to kick a halftard in the sack really fucking hard. it was beautiful.

sometimes the ASB would play music during lunch. you know what the net result was? a dozen dancing retards. the jamaicatard was easily the best dancer too.

there was another one we all called Booker T because he was obsessed with the man of his namesake. you'd say booker t and he's scream it right back.

oh, and then there's the tard who LOVED hot cheetos and would fly into a rage whenever the little store was out. this one time i handed a baseball player a piece of paper that said "no more hot cheetos" just as that tard was walking by he read it aloud and the tard flipped and started to beat the baseball player.

there was this one guy we called G because he always acted like a mexican gangster sort of fellow. you'd go "hey man, show us a lady" and he'd do that thing where you outline a woman's curves:
(..)
.)(.
(..)
sort of thing, but he'd do it more like this:
(..)
.)(.
(..)
.)(.
(..)
.)(.
(..)

All About Eve
07-10-2006, 12:50 AM
oh, i fully agree. the high school i went to was were they sent all the tards in the district. seeing two wheeltards racing down the halls is wonderful. watching a small retard with a jamaican accent chase and beat on a seven foot, four hundred pound retard with a hitler 'stache is something one never wants to forget.
Dude, I'm a swimming coach for the specail olympics here. Just talking to them is hilarious.

me: "you sure got lots of hugs"
37yearold Down guy: "you know why?" *leans in and whispers* "I'm a ladies' man!"

the best was watching him moonwalk at the dance at the actual special olympics.

All About Eve
07-10-2006, 12:51 AM
oh shit guys, i have more retard stories.

you know those half-tards? the guys that are really fucking stupid, but still able to dress themselves?
So like, slight mental retardation or are we talking more autism?

Endymion
07-10-2006, 12:54 AM
So like, slight mental retardation or are we talking more autism?
nah, just really, really fucking stupid people. you know, the ones that still can't figure out that five times five is twenty five, but they do get that five plus five is ten. the ones that maybe, if you give them a month or two, could read and understand a goosebumps book. the type of guy who you'd be iffy about hiring at mcdonalds even though they don't need a drool cup and can keep a hat on.

All About Eve
07-10-2006, 12:57 AM
Ah yeah. There are actually four classifications of mental retardation, I can't remember them, but it starts at an IQ of 69 and goes down, so I assume the ones you're talking about are like 60-69.

Endymion
07-10-2006, 01:02 AM
i dunno, maybe even in the 70s. definitely not the 80s though.

XYlophonetreeZ
07-10-2006, 01:51 AM
The senile are fun as hell too. A few years ago I met my cousins' great-grandmother (related on the other side of their family than I am). She was well into her nineties and originally from Germany, so needless to say she'd seen herself some times. She sat in a wheelchair and one of her eyes was permanently shut.

Once, when watching TV, an Aflac commercial came on and she pointed at the screen and yelled "GODDAMN DUCK!" And everyone just looked at her and she said "He's gonna eat all the food!" She was quite territorial about her food in general.

Also, my uncle brought his Shar-Pei dog on the same trip, and The Old Lady was convinced that it was a monkey. Even better, once, upon hearing my uncle speak in his heavy New York accent, she asked:

"What are ya, Irish?"
"Nah."
"Polish?"
"Nope."
"Well then what the hell are you?"
"I'm New Yawk Jewish!"
"AAAAAAAAAAA!! HIDE YOUR MONEY FROM THE JEWS!"

Endymion
07-10-2006, 02:26 AM
my dad once got a letter from his mother (well into her 80s at the time). he opened it up but nothing was inside, so he took a closer look and realized that something was written on the inside of the envelope. he unfolded it and on the inside it read "kenny, i've lost your address. could you please send it to me."

Little_Miss_1565
07-10-2006, 09:28 AM
If you'll notice, i've recently been refraining from my usual flood of retarded posts.

Sorry, you don't get snaps for doing what you're supposed to be doing in the first place.

0r4ng3
07-10-2006, 09:40 AM
"Hey, guess what, I wake up in the morning, and go to sleep at night! Where's my medal?"

noodlesfan
07-10-2006, 09:58 AM
Sorry, you don't get snaps for doing what you're supposed to be doing in the first place.
Do I at least get a "good job, you've finally stopped being as retarded as before"?

the_GoDdEsS
07-10-2006, 10:02 AM
I thought you meant real mentally retarded in real life and not random kiddies online. Laaaaame.

Little_Miss_1565
07-10-2006, 10:48 AM
Do I at least get a "good job, you've finally stopped being as retarded as before"?

Seeing as how it's clearly a big effort for you to do so? Sure.