View Full Version : Drunken Rant

07-18-2006, 03:40 PM
This is from my ex-girlfriend, whom I broke up with about a month ago. A few of my favorite parts "are you gay?" and "my fucking head hurts like bitch, never drink straight, especially when John maeks the drinks"

That last one's funny because you can't make straight drinks. They're already straight.

For some reason, I just want to thank you. For showing me alot of stuff. Like just things. And yeah. Thanks. I know this is going to be st upide mmmmmmesdfage because i don't really know what i',m sor t of saying and whatever, but its not my fault i'ts ben's, and johns', and denise. it's all her fault, they fucking left alone to the co9mputer, and yeah..messedjg up. or something?
It's hard to explinadsf how much this whole wahtever thing, has helped, it like taught me alot, and yeah, thakns again, forb eing like, a fucking teacher. or some sutpoud shit...haaha. the sad part is. you're probably laughing your ass off at this right now, saying what a fucking hoe, or bitch, or dumbass or whateverr,but later in life, you'll ghet your's, not that you can care or whatever, but just trust me, it's coming, I really never loved you, or maybe it was lust, yeah more like lust, because if i would have loved you, i would still love you, but no, i dont' because, damn, why love someone liket hat,? i can do soooo much better, hahahah, god, i love sending these htings to people, i'ts like a fucking thirll, haha, iprobably won't even remeberin ghisf shit in the morning, so why does it matter/ it doens't,i jjust wanted you to know that, fuck it, i'm done caring, i'm just done, i don't even think you were worht loving, but that'll just piss you off, you say it won;t but it will, haha and you won't even reply to this, because you don't care, and you don't have the ball s to, sowhy even write this
? idon't fucking know actually, i might just deleted it, or leave it until i cna throw up and then maybe sleep, for wahiel,then mayb ei'll vcealn it up and send i, or ayb ei won't, fuck it, mabye i will,b eause i need you to know how i actually feel aboutyou, i never once hated you, and if you hate me, then ok, ..not my issue, but it's pretty fuckin g stupid toh hate someon e you barely know.
And anotehr thing, when i started becomig indepentdent, and i ddind't need tyou, why'd you turn into an asshole then? huh? it all started when i acted like i dind't care anymore, then you couldnt' deal with it, i'm not like another one of your stupid girlfriends, i acutally don't care,a nd writing this,make s it seem like i give a shit, but i don't, i mean god, Nick, why the fuck would all this shit matter>i mean fuck there are other girls out there, and other gusy out there, for us, and oh yeah, by the way...are you gay?
i;ve always gotten this vibe off of you, god it would be soo fuking funny if you were, it would make sense though, oh and yeah, the whoel dead chick thing, really dont' phase me, beause i dont' belive you have the nuts to do something like that, you're just a 15 year old, you don't know who you are yuet, trust me on this one, i;ve fucking been there, i know all about this shit it's not pretty, but it gets better, and odn't blame it on your parentsl becuase granted, they rasied you, but fuck Nick you're your ownperson, you know aht you want, so fuck them because they don't know ath you want, only youdo, and yeah well fuck i'm gonig to sleep, because well yeha, my fucking head hurts like bitch, never drink straight, especially when John maeks the drinks, it's just not funny, i know it suck sna dhsit but yhou'r missin alot of fun things, it would be cool if you wanted to be there maybe someday you'll get over you're little pitty party and fucking grow up and come hang out with use again, i mean fuck kid, this has been the best summer ever, and you're missingasd it, i sort of felt bad, because you didn't have fun or whatever, butsomehow i knew you would create another mysepace i'm not fucking stupid, ok well drunk, granted but not fucking stupid,any yeah, so yeah if you want to come hang out with us again, you're wlecome to, dont' let me stop you from having fun, Just remeber i never fucking hated you, i cna't stress that enough, but if you would grow u p and get past it, you would see that ex's canbe just friends, and trust me, i've movedon, hehe oh have i, hahahahah, but whatever you want, just fuckig know that you don't ahve to hid e like a little bitch, your'e welcome, know one fucking cares kid!

Does anyone here speak drunken rant? Please translate this if you do.

07-18-2006, 04:12 PM
that is pretty funny.

i mean the fact you expect someone to read it all.

07-18-2006, 04:14 PM
I was expecting some kind of a translation, I couldn't get through it all.

07-18-2006, 04:33 PM
I honestly could not agree more with your user title right now.

07-18-2006, 04:34 PM
This reminds me of TPKYL, with the delicate balance between lying and just plain fucking stupidity.

07-18-2006, 05:27 PM
You should do her a favor and burn that thing.

07-18-2006, 05:42 PM
your bitch is straight up psycho.

or maybe she just shouldn't drink. ever.

07-18-2006, 05:59 PM
your bitch
Not mine anymore, for obvious reasons

07-18-2006, 06:21 PM
Too long, didn't read, was probably a lie.

07-18-2006, 07:45 PM
Do you actually think people are going to read that?

07-19-2006, 03:54 AM
thank you for teaching me "stuff" [sex & relationships]. our relationship taught me a lot. I don't know what I'm saying, but it's not my fault - it's Ben's, John's & Denise's [anyone else but me is to blame]. you're probably laughing at me right now, thinking I'm a whore, a bitch, a dumbass, or whatever. but [here I'm trying to get back at you] I never really loved you. it was lust only, or I still would've loved you & I don't, because you suck & I'm too good for you & can do way better.

it's a thrill to send things like these to people, but I probably won't remember it in the morning. so it's not like it matters, but I want you to know I'm done caring [or not?]. you weren't worth loving [I won't say I loved you] & that'll piss you off, even though you say it won't. you won't even reply to this, because you don't care [so I'm scared it indeed doesn't piss you off] & you don't have the balls to reply. [you're better than to reply to such a drunken whore] so why even write this to you? I don't know, actually. maybe I'll just delete it, maybe I'll leave it untill I throw up, or maybe I will send this to you. or maybe not. fuck it, maybe I will [I will], because I need you to know how I feel about you. I never once hated you & if you hate me, that's your problem [fuck, MY problem!], but it'd be pretty stupid to hate someone you barely know [someone you know better than I know myself].

when I became independent & didn't need you [when I needed you more than anything], why did you turn into an asshole? it started when I acted like I didn't care anymore [when I cared more than ever] & you couldn't deal with it [I couldn't deal with it]. I'm not like the rest of your stupid girlfriends; I really don't care [I CARE!!!!] & writing this makes it seem like I do care [because I do], but I don't [I do!]. why would this matter anyway [this matters a shitload]? there are other girls [all hell breaks loose if you touch one] & guys [I want no one else but you] out there for us & by the way, are you gay? [it's impossible for you to not love me, unless you're a homosexual] you always have given me this vibe that you were & it'd be fucking funny if you were. [because that'd give you a good reason to dump me, besides me being a stupid whore] it'd make sense if you were gay [because it's impossible for you to not love me, unless you're a homosexual].

& oh yeah, the whole dead chick-thing? (don't know what the FUCK that is about) I don't believe you have the guts to do something like that. you're just a 15 year old, you don't know who you are yet. trust me on this one [I have no idea what I'm talking about]; I've been there [I've been nowhere], I know all about this shit [I know nothing about anything] & it's not pretty [it's no biggy, but I made it a huge deal once & you should've seen their faces!], but it gets better [like I said; no biggy]. don't blame it on your parents, because they raised you [you obviously don't owe them anything]. but you're your own person & you know what you want. your parents don't know what you want, so fuck them [don't believe them if they say I'm a stupid whore].

I'm going to sleep [I'm going to rant some longer], because my head hurts [that's your fault]. never drink straight, especially when John makes the drinks [he tried to get into my pants by getting me drunk - come & rescue me & most of all; be jealous], because it just isn't funny [help]. you're missing out on a lot of fun [get your butt over here & rescue me] & it'd be cool if you'd be here. maybe one day you'll grow up, get over yourself & hang out with us again [take me back]. I mean, fuck kid [did I mention I'm drunk?], this has been the best summer ever [I'm trying to pretend I'm doing great without you] & you're missing out on it [I miss you]. I sort of felt bad, because you didn't have fun [I hope you've been miserable & that you miss me too].

I knew you would create another MySpace, I'm not fucking stupid [I'm stupid & didn't have a clue]. I'm drunk [because of you], but not stupid [& stupid]. if you want to hang out with us again, you're welcome to. don't let me stop you [hang out with me & take me back, if you don't, I never want to see you again] from having fun [have fun with me]. remember I never hated you [I still love you], I can't say that enough [I want you back]. if you want to grow up & get over it, you would see that expartners can be friends [we can still shag]. trust me [don't], I've moved on [I haven't], oh I have [I'm so not over you], hahahaha [I'm sad]. but if you want to [I want to], just know you don't have to hide like a fucking bitch [get your ass back to me], you're welcome, because no one fucking cares [I care & I want you back].

someone had to translate the female language & its meaning. ;p

but I don't see why you dumped her, you two seem perfect for each other.

07-19-2006, 04:45 AM
or maybe she just shouldn't drink. ever.
drinking ALONE (the fact she's writing this drunk indicates she'd been drinking by herself), PLUS while sending messages to your ex is a big ass "no no" either way.

07-19-2006, 06:02 AM
Thank you very much.

07-19-2006, 06:06 AM
that one question was serious: what the fuck was the dead chick-thing about?

07-19-2006, 06:08 AM

I'm going to avoid the horrible smiting from everyone else and not say....

07-19-2006, 06:09 AM
oh come on, what do you have to lose?

07-19-2006, 06:13 AM
He's a bullshitting attentionwhore. I'm sure the idea of posting the whole rant was to make us think he killed somebody. Blah blah.

07-19-2006, 06:27 AM
I never killed anybody.

She decided to go cruising on my computer one day and found a bunch of sites devoted to nude dead chicks, not gore sites, porn sites. Of course she took this out of hand and pretended not to care.

If you think I'm attentionwhoring, you can totally email her.


07-19-2006, 06:45 AM
I believe him, but that doesn't make it any better actually. it's still pathetic.

07-19-2006, 07:40 PM
very, very pathetic.

07-19-2006, 07:47 PM
very, very pathetic.
Says the person with the Hanson icon.

07-19-2006, 08:35 PM
Says the person with the Hanson icon.

Says the person with the faggot icon.

07-20-2006, 12:50 AM
Says the person with the Hanson icon.

omg! That was such a good insult! Obviously, I'm a pathetic human being for intentionally choosing a ridiculous icon! But the guy who posts a drunken email from an ex (an email that nobody cares about, and he shouldn't care about himself even) and tries to get people to ask him about his sick fetishes... is certainly much less pathetic.

07-20-2006, 12:51 AM
Says the person with the faggot icon.

sorry for the double post, but that srsly made me LOL. ;)

07-20-2006, 01:20 AM
Hey have you seen my band?

07-20-2006, 01:21 AM
I just realized noodlesfan is only 16... I guess that explains a lot.