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View Full Version : BBS History III; From dish washing to religious wars



the_GoDdEsS
01-05-2007, 10:46 AM
Dear fellow BBSers, another year has passed teaching us many valuable lessons. Once again it's time to look back on a time when diswashing was a promising career start, self-defence lessons were told by people who really knew what they were talking about, wonderful literature was written and religious values really mattered.

In 2006 we finally discovered that true Offspring fans (http://www.offspring.com/forums/showthread.php?t=24957&page=1&pp=10) really exist, even though the band screwed the fans and would not wish them happy holidays (http://www.offspring.com/forums/showthread.php?t=27772) any more.

Probably the most useful lesson for life all of us could learn on here was how to make preps cry (http://www.offspring.com/forums/showthread.php?t=23045). A further level of self-defence is the sissykicking (http://www.offspring.com/forums/showthread.php?t=25208). To enroll for practise, consult Whiplash who notoriously denied (http://www.offspring.com/forums/showthread.php?t=25335&page=3&highlight=pathfinder+whiplash) being pathfinder after creating a new user name in shame. And if that's not enough for you, Maria (http://www.offspring.com/forums/showthread.php?t=26865&page=4) can teach you how to make armed robbers die (http://www.offspring.com/forums/showthread.php?t=26911), because she knows it from the movies!

But it takes more than trupunx to wage a religious war. A real jihad (http://www.offspring.com/forums/showthread.php?t=27326) (multiply thread by over 300) was started in the Politics section over some cute stick drawings (a gallery established later (http://www.offspring.com/forums/showthread.php?t=27413)), or at least the terrorists thought so. But it seems Allah is not against Muhammed doing laundry, the Turks are gone, Kurds are still better (http://www.offspring.com/forums/showthread.php?t=26454) lovers and religion (http://www.offspring.com/forums/showthread.php?t=27423) continues to flourish.

And while we're on the topic of worship, let's not forget the 36-year old dishwasher virgin (http://www.offspring.com/forums/showthread.php?t=26279) who taught us how to shut her out! (Post #75). Mark Bryan, now with picture gallery (http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v372/ricky2tone/40virginlol.jpg), will be remembered by his teachings of cannabis and cantheism and Gusto's (http://www.offspring.com/forums/showthread.php?t=26300) with clean plates.

A big accomplishment was that we finally proved that we're not just drunks and drug addicts with no lives, but also have a humanitarian side when the BBS attempted to help save the puppy (http://www.offspring.com/forums/showthread.php?t=27243). But did it really?

Like every year, there have been many glorious comebacks. Among these Oxygene (http://www.offspring.com/forums/showthread.php?t=27132), bringing us backstage passes straight from the Asian steppe, Mark with the insane conspiracy faggotry (http://www.offspring.com/forums/showthread.php?t=26436&page=3) and TTiG for doing a lolz (http://www.offspring.com/forums/showthread.php?t=26805).

Literature did not come short this year with a new collection of Sin Studly's ballads:

The Ballad of Tanichka (http://www.offspring.com/forums/showthread.php?t=25072)
The Ballad of Sanni (http://www.offspring.com/forums/showthread.php?p=859915#post859915)
The Ballad of Postman Per (http://www.offspring.com/forums/showthread.php?t=25092)
The Ballad of Joey (http://www.offspring.com/forums/showthread.php?t=25110)
The Ballad of Gülşah (http://www.offspring.com/forums/showthread.php?t=25100)
The Ballad of Oxygene (http://www.offspring.com/forums/showthread.php?t=27353)

And those of you who intend to try so hard this year, won't get too far since last year we established the effort police (http://www.offspring.com/forums/showthread.php?t=22142).

Oh and before we rush into another year, you really should (http://www.offspring.com/forums/showthread.php?t=24940) check out my band www.myspace.com/dtoxrockers


----------------------------
Semi-compulsory study literature:
BBS History I (http://www.offspring.com/forums/showthread.php?t=16768)
BBS History II (http://www.offspring.com/forums/showthread.php?t=22757)

Lodat225
01-05-2007, 11:12 AM
Not a good year.

Rocky-girl
01-05-2007, 11:15 AM
haha!))You're a good chronicler! It's very pretty!

XYlophonetreeZ
01-05-2007, 11:18 AM
This is amazing, but haven't you always done these on the anniversaries of when the BBS started?

the_GoDdEsS
01-05-2007, 11:20 AM
Good point. I wanted to keep the October (then April again) date but it was kinda hard to come up with enough threads that would make it. So I waited, because it's been a little weaker since April last year.

T-6005
01-05-2007, 11:24 AM
Sweet. I've been waiting for this and you know it.

mrconeman
01-05-2007, 11:31 AM
This is fantastic.
10/10

Nineteen Seventy Nine
01-05-2007, 11:44 AM
Very, very well done. I would have figured Jojan's boobs would be somewhere in here, though.

JohnnyNemesis
01-05-2007, 12:06 PM
Simma, you're as legitmate a historian as I've ever come across! Wonderful compilation here!

lol, sissykicking.

adombomb222
01-05-2007, 12:13 PM
I wonder whats going to happen this year. Another religious war?

Llamas
01-05-2007, 12:15 PM
This was classy. It was fun because some of them were jokes I knew about, but had never seen the threads for. *Applauds*.

killer_queen
01-05-2007, 12:21 PM
I hate you for not posting as much as you used to do. :( You make this board ten times better.

Lodat225
01-05-2007, 12:53 PM
The last two were hilarious. This one isn't that funny.

Lizardus
01-05-2007, 01:03 PM
Yay! Story time!

WebDudette
01-05-2007, 01:50 PM
Awesome, Maria's stupidity frightens me some times.

RickyCrack
01-05-2007, 03:10 PM
This thread brought back old nostalgia that I had previously lost, but now have found, no matter who you are, I'll be here to love you.

lilian [darkest star]
01-05-2007, 03:34 PM
I wonder whats going to happen this year. Another religious war?

MORMON GENOCIDE!

anyone anyone?

RickyCrack
01-05-2007, 03:37 PM
;949213']MORMON GENOCIDE!

anyone anyone?

Yea, way to distract away from the thread. Atleast read about it before you talk about it. Mormons don't deserve to be mentioned here.

Stranger With Candy
01-05-2007, 03:45 PM
that was great. just like the first two.

HeadAroundU
01-05-2007, 04:57 PM
This thread is like, zomg-lol-wtf-zomg-lol-wtf-zomg-lol-wtf. Keep it up.

0r4ng3
01-05-2007, 08:28 PM
This whole "BBS History" thing is great, but I've noticed that most of the references come from very late in the year, like in the last month or so.

T-6005
10-18-2007, 08:17 AM
I still love this and the other two.

0r4ng3
10-18-2007, 08:20 AM
Does this mean another BBS History thread is coming up? The past 10 months since this thread have been very historical.

HeadAroundU
10-18-2007, 09:18 AM
It's time for another BBS history thread!

JohnnyNemesis
10-18-2007, 09:19 AM
I've always loved these threads. Simma is amazing.

ruroken
10-18-2007, 09:45 AM
I favor new history (I've been absent and am curious as to what else I missed)

Vera
10-18-2007, 09:48 AM
These are fab and why I'm so very glad this board has been around for so long. Gems to be treasured.

Andy
10-18-2007, 09:48 AM
Not a good year.

Well, I did miss half of it.

Not Ozymandias
10-18-2007, 01:22 PM
This was way funnier than History of the World Part I, but then so is cancer.
I had completely forgotten about Whiplash's aborted first attempt to join the board.

I was going to ask why Sinister's predatorial tendencies or the belated April Fools thread weren't included until I realized the thread was almost 11 months old. I'm from Canada, they think I'm a little slow, eh?

Jakebert
10-18-2007, 01:24 PM
I fell off the monkey bars, and when I woke up I was in here.

Dodongo
10-18-2007, 01:38 PM
My approach on Oxygene was the best on that list, by far. Fuck everything else.

BREAK
10-19-2007, 05:39 PM
Come on, Mark_Bryan_420 was lulz incarnate.

T-6005
10-19-2007, 11:31 PM
I hesitated between mild amusement and crushing bouts of pity.