PDA

View Full Version : Man Thread.



Jakebert
01-22-2008, 01:37 PM
The tampon thread has been alienating me for some time now. This is the thread for all things manly.

STEAKBEERTITSAMERICA!

coke_a_holic
01-22-2008, 01:38 PM
So guys, I was totally shaving while pumping iron, right, and this chick starts nailing me right there.

I showed no emotion.

Duskygrin
01-22-2008, 01:44 PM
This is the second hilarious post I've read of jakebert's and coke-a-holic's in a row. as far as jakebert is concerned, the first one was "I should have never opened that thread". That got me laughing, as I imagined his state of mind on reading stuff...

a-ny-way. I've got nothing to say here, really. erm. good god i've just embarrassed myself...

JohnnyNemesis
01-22-2008, 01:44 PM
There's too much fucking win in here. It's amazing, I love it.

But this thread is nothing, and I mean NOTHING, without this (http://washingtondc.craigslist.org/nva/mis/539628864.html).

your not cool in 2008.

Vera
01-22-2008, 01:53 PM
This reminds me of the horrific The Man Show that they showed here a few years back. Why oh why.

HornyPope
01-22-2008, 01:54 PM
So guys, I was totally shaving while pumping iron, right, and this chick starts nailing me right there.

I showed no emotion.

*chest bump*

Whooo-hah!

I hope you superman'd that ho.

p.s. Does she have a sister?

JohnnyNemesis
01-22-2008, 01:54 PM
If this, or any other thread, bears any resemblance to The Man Show in any non-satirical fashion, I'm gonna petition for the immediate and violent beatdown of Jakebert and all of his supporters.

Vera
01-22-2008, 01:56 PM
If this, or any other thread, bears any resemblance to The Man Show in any non-satirical fashion, I'm gonna petition for the immediate and violent beatdown of Jakebert and all of his supporters.

Why? Jimmy Kimmel knows all men luv beer and boobies and shitty humor.

Sidewinder
01-22-2008, 01:57 PM
Man, the man show's for the man, man. They weren't men.

JohnnyNemesis
01-22-2008, 01:59 PM
Why? Jimmy Kimmel knows all men luv beer and boobies and shitty humor.

your not cool in 2008 :(

Jakebert
01-22-2008, 02:09 PM
That dude is so cool. I'll bet Debbie's body is still fuckin' rocked, man!

Hang on though, bros, I gotta chug a beer then do some push ups.

JohnnyNemesis
01-22-2008, 02:10 PM
I'll bet Debbie's body is still fuckin' rocked, man!

Especially her majik box.

Jakebert
01-22-2008, 02:15 PM
Dudes, I totally never want to hang with Markus. He just doesn't get it, bros.

And if that dude wasn't listening to the Scorpions when he was slammin' his Little Debbie, then I'm gonna be pretty disappointed.

coke_a_holic
01-22-2008, 02:18 PM
So guys, any tips on what to put in your protein shakes?


I've been using raw eggs and bacon, but feel like I need more beef, you know what I mean, bros? So yeah, hook me up, I'll be doing some sit-ups and drinking beer.

Markus
01-22-2008, 02:20 PM
Lets all go to Snaps! If you've never been to Snaps you're not really a man yet.

http://i22.photobucket.com/albums/b307/8Project6/bs.jpg

Jakebert
01-22-2008, 02:29 PM
So guys, any tips on what to put in your protein shakes?


I've been using raw eggs and bacon, but feel like I need more beef, you know what I mean, bros? So yeah, hook me up, I'll be doing some sit-ups and drinking beer.

You should put some burger king in there, dude. It's got fucking jalepeno's on it.

coke_a_holic
01-22-2008, 02:39 PM
Hmm, I do love the Spicy Dub Whops.

And by love, I mean exhibit no emotion whatsoever.

Hold on, I need to go shave.

Again.

Shit Eater!!!
01-22-2008, 02:40 PM
You made a thread dedicated to me? Thank you!!!

Camel Filters
01-22-2008, 02:44 PM
Lets all go to Snaps! If you've never been to Snaps you're not really a man yet.

http://i22.photobucket.com/albums/b307/8Project6/bs.jpg

Dude I've been there before. Remember that one time when we went together and the bouncer made these three hot chicks get up on stage. I mean, they didn't get completly naked but it was still hot.

Camel Filters
01-22-2008, 03:22 PM
The tampon thread has been alienating me for some time now.

You're just jelous cause my threads can actually reach 100 posts.

killer_queen
01-22-2008, 03:52 PM
There aren't such things called manly things. See, when we girls meet up we talk about makeup, fashion, boys, tampons, bras and periods. Those are girly things and boys have got nothing to say about these things. But we can also enjoy talking about sports, hot women, we like beer and steak too. The only thing we can't do is talk about peeing standing up and I have the feeling that you don't do it either. Life is great when you are a girl (if we ignore the living with the fear of getting raped, sexual harassments and period cramps).

JohnnyNemesis
01-22-2008, 03:54 PM
See, when we girls meet up we talk about makeup, fashion, boys, tampons, bras and periods.

Men can talk about all of those things in one way or another. And aside from tampons, bras, and periods, all of those can be just as manly depending on the situation/context.

Um, what I mean is, stfu bitch *backhand*

Camel Filters
01-22-2008, 03:54 PM
The only thing we can't do is talk about peeing standing up.

You can't talk about jacking off either.

mrconeman
01-22-2008, 03:55 PM
We can talk about having logic and not being innately insane though. Which is always good times. Oh and quoting religiously from movies, and uhh, talking about being from the same gender that brought us every meaningful invention throughout history.

But yeah, enjoy your period.

WebDudette
01-22-2008, 03:56 PM
This shits lame, I'm too tough guy to be on the internet, internet fags.
Go outside and lift some weights before I come kick your ass.

killer_queen
01-22-2008, 04:03 PM
Oh, and while talking about our periods we also mention our fluctuating breasts. And while doing that we grab each other's boobs.

Enjoy your quoting from movies.

JohnnyNemesis
01-22-2008, 04:04 PM
Gulsah - 2
mrconeman - 1.5
JohnnyNemesis - 1

I like this battle.

Camel Filters
01-22-2008, 04:05 PM
And while doing that we grab each other's boobs.

Do you have any idea how big my erection is right now?

mrconeman
01-22-2008, 04:16 PM
Well I can't compete with boobs.

Jakebert
01-22-2008, 04:54 PM
Unless you can bench press 300 while eating a triple decker hamburger and getting a blowjob the same time, you're not allowed to post in this thread.

Wolfbutter
01-22-2008, 04:57 PM
wow youre so macho and manly

nieh
01-22-2008, 05:01 PM
Unless you can bench press 300 while eating a triple decker hamburger and getting a blowjob the same time, you're not allowed to post in this thread.

Last time I tried this, the blowjob distracted me and I dropped the weights on the girl's head. I showed no emotion and proceeded to have sex with her corpse.

JohnnyNemesis
01-22-2008, 05:07 PM
I heard that, one time, James Brown was getting a blowjob while eating a sandwich with one hand and slapping another woman's ass (who happened to be gyrating it in his face at the time) with the other hand.

His manager approached and told him it was time to go on stage and perform.

He cried "Dammit, can't you see I'm eatin' a sandwich?!"

Now that's manly.

Jakebert
01-22-2008, 05:19 PM
The last two posts are amazing. Now let's all go watch John Wayne movies.

Lizardus
01-22-2008, 05:21 PM
So guys, any tips on what to put in your protein shakes?


Beer, Tequila,Fire water, absinthe and steroids.

Jakebert
01-22-2008, 05:26 PM
I know someone who drank vodka and orange juice during soccer conditioning, running like 6-7 miles in 90 degree heat.

It was the most vomit I've ever seen.

Homer
01-22-2008, 05:26 PM
Yeah, I uh, like... Hummers?

T-6005
01-22-2008, 06:04 PM
Beer, Tequila,Fire water, absinthe and steroids.
Not too recommended. Testosterone breaks down into estrogen. Ever seen a professional bodybuilder 10 years after he stops?

Harnum
01-22-2008, 06:07 PM
MAN THREAD! Not man-turned-to-woman-after-growing-tits-and-vag-from-estrogen thread. Ew, bad images. :(

T-6005
01-22-2008, 06:08 PM
MAN THREAD! Not man-turned-to-woman-after-growing-tits-and-vag-from-estrogen thread. Ew, bad images. :(
Men have to know how to stay men, buddy.

Harnum
01-22-2008, 06:10 PM
True enough.

So that kinda shit starts to happen? He develops womanly characteristics all over and junk?

coke_a_holic
01-22-2008, 06:17 PM
Ever see Fight Club? Bob has bitchtits.

RickyCrack
01-22-2008, 06:27 PM
yo wassup dawgs!? im so manly i dont fukkin care bout correct speling nd grammer. Lets all fukkin bro out, drink some brewskies, eat sum krunch rap sumpremeskies. Cant tonite cuz im watchin wrlds strongst man on espn rite now, unless youall wanna cum here dawgz. I gotta cold pack of natty ice in muh fridge and an order of bdubs (buffolo wild wings, if you aren't manly enuff to understand my manly lingo) on [t]its way. Id drive and get it but i dun wanna drive my turbo charged rice car in this fukkin snow. Ya kno dawgs?!

Jakebert
01-22-2008, 06:35 PM
I haven't had natty for a while, but I can still taste it whenever it's mentioned.

Scizor me timbersss
01-22-2008, 08:00 PM
i needs an ise colwd pepsee

waysteddd

Llamas
01-22-2008, 10:32 PM
Unless you can bench press 300 while eating a triple decker hamburger and getting a blowjob the same time, you're not allowed to post in this thread.
Nobody who posts here is this cool or manly :( fagz.


Last time I tried this, the blowjob distracted me and I dropped the weights on the girl's head. I showed no emotion and proceeded to have sex with her corpse.
I totally lol'd.

Gulsah wins. So totally.

Oh and to ruin your man-fest,

LOL PERIODS TAMPONS BRAS PERIODS LOL

WebDudette
01-22-2008, 10:36 PM
Lolo Dble Bacon Mc Curbstomp Sum Emo Fgt N Drnk Sum Mother Fuckin Natty Ice While I Curl Ur Mom And Fuck Ur Sister Lol

edit:something is correcting my caps : ( no cruise control for cool.

wheelchairman
01-22-2008, 11:31 PM
There's too many vaginas in this thread. Which means there are too many empty kitchens. You guys piss me off in a way where I don't actually have feelings. I'm gonna go lift weights AND SMOKE A CIGAR.

RickyCrack
01-23-2008, 12:48 AM
chewing tobacco is way more manlier -- which i do. Especially when i'm playing xbox and playing pick up games with the bros out at the construction site and fuck the cheerleaders afterwards -- with tobacco still in my mouth, because i don't gives no fuck.

Mota Boy
01-23-2008, 01:16 AM
Oh, and while talking about our periods we also mention our fluctuating breasts. And while doing that we grab each other's boobs.Ooh, woooow. You get to hold breasts with your hands. I bet that's sooooo much better than holding them with your mouth.

Men!... Men!... Men!... Men!

GreenTerror
01-23-2008, 01:20 AM
Ooh, woooow. You get to hold breasts with your hands. I bet that's sooooo much better than holding them with your mouth.

Men!... Men!... Men!... Men!

We can do that too, she just left that part out.

Denial, Revisited
01-23-2008, 01:45 AM
Ever see Fight Club? Bob has bitchtits.

lmfao! That cracked me up :D

Sidewinder
01-23-2008, 09:37 AM
So I was driving my pickup truck today. It can haul four metric shit tons and gets sixty-seven yards to the gallon. Filled that 30 gallon take up three times today.

I should mention that I was hauling rocks back and forth across town. Rocks and blond cheerleaders.

JohnnyNemesis
01-23-2008, 10:27 AM
This is ouuuuuuuuuur country.

Jakebert
01-23-2008, 10:30 AM
http://cache.jalopnik.com/cars/assets/resources/2007/04/Toby-Keith-FoMoCo-Amerigasm.jpg

UNCLE SAM IS GONNA STICK A BOOT IN YOUR ASS WHILE I OPENLY CRY WATCHING OLD YELLER.

T-6005
01-23-2008, 10:49 AM
So you went from manly men to dickheaded American men. It's an interesting progression.

JohnnyNemesis
01-23-2008, 10:55 AM
How is there any difference between manly men and dickheaded men? Honestly now.

nieh
01-23-2008, 10:56 AM
Are you trying to imply that non-American men are manly?

Tijs
01-23-2008, 11:23 AM
Hi,

I've never been in a manly thread before. But this is gonna ROCK! But please, don't smoke if I'm around because it hurts my eyes. I also don't like weed or any of that stuff and I don't drink alcohol.

edit: Also, I'm skinny. Don't like meat that much, but enjoy candy a lot.

calichix
01-23-2008, 11:42 AM
I think you guys should divulge man secrets like the belt tuck and the pocket hole.

Sidewinder
01-23-2008, 12:07 PM
My lunch just consisted of steak-topped steak with a side of ribs and my dessert was scotch-smothered hotwings.

0r4ng3
01-23-2008, 12:11 PM
Hi, I just came back from punching a whale in the face. Afterwards I chugged a bottle of beer, steak sauce, and motor oil.

Sidewinder
01-23-2008, 10:03 PM
Hi, I just came back from punching a whale in the face. Afterwards I chugged a bottle of beer, steak sauce, and motor oil.
Why did you chug steak sauce and not steaks?

Lodat225
01-23-2008, 10:10 PM
This is the thread for me.

I'm going to go grow a beard and break stuff now.

JohnnyNemesis
01-23-2008, 10:17 PM
I actually had a beard (manly), then I shaved it off today (super manly).

I also texted (super fuckin' ghey) Jakebert tonight. While drinking a beer (mega manly), though it was an import (sorta manly), at a bar (OMG FUCKIN' LOTSA CHICKS MANLY).

Sidewinder
01-23-2008, 10:18 PM
I think you guys should divulge man secrets like the belt tuck and the pocket hole.
I think you girls should divulge some bewbies.*



*I would never say this outside the manthread

Nicole
01-23-2008, 10:27 PM
I think you girls should divulge some bewbies.*



*I would never say this outside the manthread

Tit for tat, show us your goods first.

0r4ng3
01-24-2008, 12:29 AM
Why did you chug steak sauce and not steaks?
Well, I can't chug steaks if I'm high-fiveing them.

RickyCrack
01-24-2008, 01:32 AM
Tit for tat, show us your goods first.

~~
~~~
8==================D
~~~
~~

mrconeman
01-24-2008, 02:27 AM
With both Mr. and Man, I'd like to stake a claim for most manly username.

Vera
01-24-2008, 02:29 AM
Not to mention 'cone' is uber-phallic.

LIKE A PENIS.

Which is manly.

wheelchairman
01-24-2008, 02:35 AM
With both Mr. and Man, I'd like to stake a claim for most manly username.

I don't know, I've got wheels and chairs. Men love wheels and they love chairs, put them together....

oh yeah and I got man too.

mrconeman
01-24-2008, 02:39 AM
Obviously we have to arm wrestle now, bro.

Jakebert
01-24-2008, 06:33 AM
I actually had a beard (manly), then I shaved it off today (super manly).

I also texted (super fuckin' ghey) Jakebert tonight. While drinking a beer (mega manly), though it was an import (sorta manly), at a bar (OMG FUCKIN' LOTSA CHICKS MANLY).

I was in bed (not manly) resting up because I worked out earlier that day (manly) and was kind of annoyed that I was getting a text (manly) until I what it was, and then decided it was totally worth getting up.

Also, as for manliest username, the only way to settle this is a "who can pee the farthest" contest. Let's do it, boys.

JoY
01-24-2008, 02:53 PM
There aren't such things called manly things. See, when we girls meet up we talk about makeup, fashion, boys, tampons, bras and periods. Those are girly things and boys have got nothing to say about these things. But we can also enjoy talking about sports, hot women, we like beer and steak too. The only thing we can't do is talk about peeing standing up and I have the feeling that you don't do it either. Life is great when you are a girl (if we ignore the living with the fear of getting raped, sexual harassments and period cramps).

preach it, woman!<3


Men can talk about all of those things in one way or another. And aside from tampons, bras, and periods, all of those can be just as manly depending on the situation/context.

Um, what I mean is, stfu bitch *backhand*

yeah, you men can be like; "ma bitch iz on her period n i wants sex so bad!" while we're hanging out with girlfriendz, drinking red wine & eating chocolate, discussing your tiny penises & why we made up our period.

..well, not YOUR tiny penis. everyone knows yours is huge.


You can't talk about jacking off either.

no, but we have ten fingers & 11cm of clitoris.


We can talk about having logic and not being innately insane though. Which is always good times. Oh and quoting religiously from movies, and uhh, talking about being from the same gender that brought us every meaningful invention throughout history.

But yeah, enjoy your period.

that was almost good, but..


Oh, and while talking about our periods we also mention our fluctuating breasts. And while doing that we grab each other's boobs.

Enjoy your quoting from movies.

damn woman, you are GOOD.

0r4ng3
01-24-2008, 04:21 PM
*high-fives another steak*

*then proceeds to punch it in the face*

Camel Filters
01-24-2008, 04:24 PM
no, but we have ten fingers & 11cm of clitoris.

I just popped a boner.

JohnnyNemesis
01-24-2008, 04:24 PM
everyone knows yours is huge.

I feel like I should just keep repeating this, over and over and over again, in this thread.

Jakebert
01-24-2008, 04:46 PM
Yeah, but I'm not sure who she's talking about.

JohnnyNemesis
01-24-2008, 04:49 PM
Me. Me and my penis. Me and my very large and intimidating penis.

Jakebert
01-24-2008, 04:57 PM
I use mine to open cans of beer and make my wimminz stop talking back.

Lizardus
01-24-2008, 05:30 PM
I use mine to open cans of beer and make my wimminz stop talking back.

A wise man once said that the smartest thing that came out from a woman's mouth was Einstein's penis.

Jakebert
01-24-2008, 05:36 PM
Oh man, I absolutely love that.

Well, I mean, I don't love things, but yeah.

Sunny
01-24-2008, 06:30 PM
A wise man once said that the smartest thing that came out from a woman's mouth was Einstein's penis.

oh my god.
that's so amazing.

Camel Filters
01-24-2008, 06:31 PM
Me. Me and my penis. Me and my very large and intimidating penis.

I want pics.

JohnnyNemesis
01-24-2008, 07:02 PM
oh my god.
that's so amazing.

I agree, but it's also an old one that's been done to death. But yes, amazing.

Amazing like my. lol. I won't. lolololololo.


I want pics.

$50 USD, I accept PayPal.

Llamas
01-24-2008, 07:13 PM
You charged me $100 :( Why does camel filters get the discount??:mad:

JohnnyNemesis
01-24-2008, 07:15 PM
You got the deluxe set, PLUS a coupon for $20 off the video. He's only getting the starter kit.

WebDudette
01-24-2008, 07:16 PM
I'd like to mention I got it all for free for my birthday.

Jakebert
01-24-2008, 07:17 PM
I got it free for Ricky's birthday.

Rag Doll
01-24-2008, 07:17 PM
i've gotten it for free for no special reason. prnkonu!

JohnnyNemesis
01-24-2008, 07:19 PM
It's funny, 'cause I was just thinking "wait 'til Sam posts..."

...

...<3

Rag Doll
01-24-2008, 07:20 PM
bahaha! i hope you're all mad jeluzzzz...

<333333

WebDudette
01-24-2008, 07:21 PM
This thread suddenly became far less manly (my bad)...

But not that I care or anything, because I don't care about anything.

I'm going to go eat a stick of pepperoni.

Llamas
01-24-2008, 07:23 PM
pilz e and jakebert just fagged up the thread so hardcore. so much more than any girl could. but camel filters started the faggotry.

JohnnyNemesis
01-24-2008, 07:23 PM
Lies. My penis is the manliest thing on this forum.

Rag Doll
01-24-2008, 07:25 PM
Lies. My penis is the manliest thing on this forum.

forserious.

how could talking about having a hot girl with a nice rack love your very large penis NOT be manly? geez.

Sidewinder
01-24-2008, 07:26 PM
What happens if your penis starts balding like your other head, though? Definitely not manly. Better start rogaining that shit.

Jakebert
01-24-2008, 07:26 PM
I can man this thread back up again. All I have to do is say two words: Slim Jim.

WebDudette
01-24-2008, 07:27 PM
Snap In To A Slim Jim! (http://www.retrojunk.com/details_commercial/409/)

JohnnyNemesis
01-24-2008, 07:33 PM
This:


how could talking about having a hot girl with a nice rack love your very large penis NOT be manly? geez.

Allows me to overcome this:



What happens if your penis starts balding like your other head, though? Definitely not manly. Better start rogaining that shit.

Besides, balding is about as manly as it gets!

AND YES RANDY SAVAGE IS THE GREATEST GODDAMMIT.

ninthlayer
01-24-2008, 08:40 PM
~~
~~~
8==================D
~~~
~~

~~
~~~
8==================D
~~~
~~

Lodat225
01-24-2008, 09:10 PM
Tiny balls ...

ninthlayer
01-24-2008, 11:09 PM
Stop living, you fucking faggot.

iPunk247
01-25-2008, 03:26 AM
Muahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah ahahahahahahaha

Dang! What about a Woman Thread? SHOPPINGPERIODSSEXMENAMERICAPUNKS.

Jakebert
01-25-2008, 06:29 AM
I'll approve of that post, only for the unintentional hilarity of putting "punks" in there.

JohnnyNemesis
01-25-2008, 09:27 AM
Dang! What about a Woman Thread? SHOPPINGPERIODSSEXMENAMERICAPUNKS.

That's what the tampon thread was...

...

...aw, forget it.

STEAKBEERTITS THIS IS OUUUUUUUUUR COUNTRY!

ready_set_fail
01-25-2008, 09:35 AM
Well as this is the man thread, may we all keep in mind that none of this is actually happening because somewhere....lies a dark, dark evil. Women are afoot!

Jakebert
01-25-2008, 11:15 AM
Hang on guys, watch this...watch, are you watching?

*burps the lyrics to "Free Bird"*

FUCK YEEEEAH!

HornyPope
01-25-2008, 02:42 PM
Hang on guys, watch this...watch, are you watching?

*burps the lyrics to "Free Bird"*

FUCK YEEEEAH!

Pffff... that's nothing unless you do the solo.

iPunk247
01-25-2008, 07:22 PM
Sorry, cut me off some slack will ya?

Sidewinder
01-25-2008, 09:22 PM
Pffff... that's nothing unless you do the solo.
I play the solo with my penis. Which is massive.

Apathy
01-25-2008, 09:45 PM
My Penis only plays Bass solos, because it's that much bigger.

Not to mention it's very experienced with slapping and popping.

HornyPope
01-25-2008, 09:46 PM
I play the solo with my penis. Which is massive.
Wow.
I bet you can't do it again.

Edit: Now if you excuse me, i'm gonna go out and get trashed. FRIDAY NIGHT PARTY BABY WHOOOOHOOOO YESSIR FUCKYOURMOM WOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

nieh
01-26-2008, 07:22 AM
Oh god I messed up. I messed up big time. Last night I got lost walking through Philly and actually had to ask for directions. I didn't know what else to do! I think I may need to kill myself after that.

JohnnyNemesis
01-26-2008, 09:24 AM
Oh god I messed up. I messed up big time. Last night I got lost walking through Philly and actually had to ask for directions. I didn't know what else to do! I think I may need to kill myself after that.

Or, you can go to war. Then you'd die all manly like.

Amanda Shittingdicks
01-26-2008, 09:57 AM
So anyway, I was taking a huge shit earlier when the alarm on my swiss-army knife/watch/tweezers started going off. I looked at the time and I said "Fuck, I'm missing the game!"

I used my mighty and supernatural strength to lift the toilet from its base and force it through the 3 walls that separated the game from me and my shitting. I rested upon my perch with the shit still gripping my sphincter and I was so overcome by the pure energy of my testosterone-induced feat of strength, I started masturbating all over the TV. Then Charles Bronson came into my house and I said "I thought you were dead!" and then he punched me in the eye and said "I can't be killed."

Then we high-fived.

Apathy
01-26-2008, 10:41 AM
Masturbating?

What are you, Gay?

Jakebert
01-26-2008, 10:56 AM
Seriously. Manly men pound vag when they want to release some steam, not masturbate. You gave yourself a handjob, QUEER.

wheelchairman
01-27-2008, 07:21 AM
My cock has teeth.... (with hairs on them)

wheelchairman
01-27-2008, 07:40 AM
Faggot, my semen lifts weights.

wheelchairman
01-27-2008, 07:51 AM
Gotta fuck something. Better to fuck each other than to fuck themselves.

Sidewinder
01-27-2008, 04:56 PM
Random question time. How many times a day do all of you shave?

Personally I try to once after every meal and even after snacks, although it can be tough to do it at school.

Llamas
01-27-2008, 05:28 PM
Only girly men shave. A real man roughs it with the burly manness of hair.

JohnnyNemesis
01-27-2008, 05:30 PM
Nah, you're the only man that does that.

Lizardus
01-27-2008, 08:24 PM
Random question time. How many times a day do all of you shave?

Personally I try to once after every meal and even after snacks, although it can be tough to do it at school.

I shave six times a day with a hunting knife.




Then i wax my bikini line.

Jakebert
01-27-2008, 08:29 PM
Hey dudes, what's going on? I just strangled a deer, then cooked it up for dinner on my grill. What the fuck is going on here?

RickyCrack
01-27-2008, 08:35 PM
you cooked? not manly.

Little_Miss_1565
01-27-2008, 08:36 PM
my balls are so advanced my semen can read.

This is the most manly thing I've ever read.

JohnnyNemesis
01-27-2008, 08:37 PM
you cooked? not manly.

He meant to say that he "grilled", which actually is the manliest thing possible. As long as he showed no emotion while doing so. And had his nephew in a headlock.

Camel Filters
01-27-2008, 08:41 PM
you cooked? not manly.

There is nothing wrong with a man who likes to cook. I love cooking. It impresses the ladys.


Random question time. How many times a day do all of you shave?

Are you talking about shaving my face or shaving my genatals? My face I usually shave once a week and my genatals I usually shave twice a month.

RickyCrack
01-27-2008, 08:43 PM
grizzly adams never grilled his choked deer meat. and much like grizzly adams i just eat the raw heart of the animals i kill and leave the rest to waste, except when i want to make my own jager -- i know deer blood isn't really in jager but i dare you to think of a manlier drink that doesn't include deer blood.

nieh
01-27-2008, 08:48 PM
There is nothing wrong with a man who likes to cook. I love cooking. It impresses the ladys.

Who needs to cook to impress ladies? Our ripped bodies and chest hair do that for us.

JohnnyNemesis
01-27-2008, 08:50 PM
Tijs made some super awesome posts in this thread.

Camel Filters
01-27-2008, 08:51 PM
Who needs to cook to impress ladies? Our ripped bodies and chest hair do that for us.

I don't have enough time to work out and grow a 6 pack.

Apathy
01-27-2008, 09:16 PM
My semen have sex with sewomen all day.

Sidewinder
01-27-2008, 10:06 PM
I don't have enough time to work out and grow a 6 pack.
You buy 6 packs at the fucking store.

Camel Filters
01-28-2008, 04:13 AM
You buy 6 packs at the fucking store.

I'm not talking about beer. Although beer is very Manly.

Sidewinder
01-28-2008, 06:01 AM
I'm not talking about beer.
There's no legitimate excuse not to.

Lizardus
01-28-2008, 11:01 AM
you cooked? not manly.

Fuck! Cooking can be manly, i have scars from burning hot oil falling on my hands.

Jakebert
01-28-2008, 11:27 AM
Cooking is not manly, unless it is done over an open campfire or grill, and only if you're cooking an animal that you killed with your own bare hands.

Homer
01-28-2008, 11:51 AM
My punch is so fast that it cooks the meat with one swing.

ninthlayer
01-28-2008, 11:59 AM
Men aren't agile, you fairy fuck.

Jakebert
01-28-2008, 11:52 PM
http://img180.imageshack.us/img180/17/20070703fd6.gif

Vera
01-29-2008, 04:37 AM
I dunno, it depends for me. I mean normally I use tampons but during the last days I'm afraid I'll forget and like, die of tampon shock and yeah, then I move to pads.

Edit. lol whoops wrong thred. XD

SplinterByMyOwnDesign
01-29-2008, 04:43 AM
My punch is so fast that it cooks the meat with one swing.

Come on now... You aren't Chuck Norris.

Jakebert
01-29-2008, 09:49 AM
You're right, he's not an incredibly overrated and unfunny pop culture reference.

nieh
01-29-2008, 09:51 AM
You're right, he's not an incredibly overrated and unfunny pop culture reference.

Well, his name IS Homer.

Llamas
01-29-2008, 11:34 AM
I dunno, it depends for me. I mean normally I use tampons but during the last days I'm afraid I'll forget and like, die of tampon shock and yeah, then I move to pads.

Edit. lol whoops wrong thred. XD

lol I totally love you.

That_Guy91
01-29-2008, 11:49 AM
Don't worry, lesbian love is appropriate for this thread.

0r4ng3
01-29-2008, 02:50 PM
As long as it involves steak, punches, faces, trucks, or any combination of the aforementioned.

Jakebert
01-29-2008, 03:38 PM
I love to watch lesbians wrestle in Jell-O in the bed of my pickup truck while I grill steaks, drink beer, and kick ass.

KICK ASS!

Llamas
01-29-2008, 03:44 PM
A real man gets it on with said lesbians after watching them jello wrestle, because he's so manly that even lesbians can't resist him.

Sidewinder
01-29-2008, 04:07 PM
I love to watch lesbians wrestle in Jell-O in the bed of my pickup truck while I grill steaks, drink beer, and kick ass.

KICK ASS!
While showing no emotion, no doubt.


A real man gets it on with said lesbians after watching them jello wrestle, because he's so manly that even lesbians can't resist him.
You know nothing of manliness. A real man simply makes them do it again.

Jakebert
01-29-2008, 04:10 PM
But the kicker is that the man makes the lesbians prepare the Jell-O for him, since that kind of cooking is clearly off limits.

nieh
01-29-2008, 04:12 PM
I once tried to make jell-o on the grill. It left the lesbians with second degree burns and I showed no emotion.

Sidewinder
01-29-2008, 05:12 PM
But the kicker is that the man makes the lesbians prepare the Jell-O for him, since that kind of cooking is clearly off limits.
I thought that went without saying.

JohnnyNemesis
01-29-2008, 07:59 PM
so manly that even lesbians can't resist him.

Read that again, lawl.


I once tried to make jell-o on the grill. It left the lesbians with second degree burns and I showed no emotion.

YES.

JoY
01-30-2008, 01:23 AM
Cooking is not manly, unless it is done over an open campfire or grill, and only if you're cooking an animal that you killed with your own bare hands.

my boyfriend is a hunter. he shoots it, he plucks/skins/guts it (though the fascias are women´s work & I often get to do that) & then I get to make it for dinner. what a crappy hobby my man has.:(

Jakebert
01-30-2008, 06:26 AM
You misspelled "manly". That's okay, you have an inferior woman brain.

Not Ozymandias
02-14-2008, 08:04 PM
Real men don't pee in toilets. The sink, the shower drain, a bottle and outside are the only manly options.

iPunk247
02-14-2008, 08:11 PM
I know this is the Man Thread and all but A real man must wear a pink polo shirt or unless men are a bunch of pussies. Not all men just some. :) :) :) LOL

Not Ozymandias
02-14-2008, 08:14 PM
I don't believe that you were actually laughing out loud.

WebDudette
02-14-2008, 08:14 PM
If I had a billion dollars. I'd cop more pink polos and pop those collars.

WebDudette
02-14-2008, 08:17 PM
People compliment my pink Blood Brothers shirt all the time. No lie, its a good conversational piece.

You deleted your post and made it look like I was talking to myself : (.

iPunk247
02-14-2008, 08:18 PM
I am beyond impressed my kind friend. Nope I wasn't LOL! Just plain innocent:rolleyes:

iPunk247
02-14-2008, 08:23 PM
PilZ-E YOU RULE! Finally a REAL MAN ;) xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

JohnnyNemesis
02-14-2008, 11:26 PM
I think I might hate you.

RickyCrack
02-15-2008, 02:56 AM
although so i know so. ps.s. li'm drunk deallllllllllllllll faggots. who wants to suck my e-dick. i don't wanna suck it myself whereas i'd have to call myself a faggot and that'd cause an integer overflow or a breakdown of the inverternests, SOMEBODY SUCK MAH HHHHHHHHHHHHHH DISCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! FAGGOTS

Lizardus
02-15-2008, 02:15 PM
I once killed a bear with a crocodile.
Then i drank a can of gasoline..

Llamas
02-15-2008, 05:19 PM
The manliness of this bbs has let me down... not even one post in here about how much too manly you lot are for valentine's day. :(

JohnnyNemesis
02-15-2008, 05:21 PM
not even one post in here about how much too manly you lot are for valentine's day. :(

What the fuck is a valentine's day?

iPunk247
02-15-2008, 07:57 PM
I think I might hate you.

It's cool to hate. :D :cool: :D

Lizardus
02-15-2008, 08:14 PM
The manliness of this bbs has let me down... not even one post in here about how much too manly you lot are for valentine's day. :(

I made some boots and a coat with the bear and gave them to some chick for a bj and sex.

Then i knocked her out and took my shit back.

I showed no emotion.

nieh
11-06-2008, 08:30 PM
I love this thread. And by "love", I of course mean have no emotion towards it.

Cock Joke
11-06-2008, 08:31 PM
My kinda thread!!! :cool:

T-6005
11-06-2008, 08:43 PM
This thread would be a thousand times more manly if it hadn't started out as a reaction to women's periods.

_Lost_
11-06-2008, 09:00 PM
... i just don't know what to say here...

wheelchairman
11-07-2008, 02:39 AM
This is because you have no penis. Don't worry, you can compensate with cigars. :)

_Lost_
11-07-2008, 10:32 AM
Well I DO have a penis... theres just a man attached to the end of it. Buuut he likes to share it with me sometimes.

And you slipped up WCM. You smiled. You aren't a real man.

mrs_hollandova
11-07-2008, 10:38 AM
well i do have a penis... Theres just a man attached to the end of it. Buuut he likes to share it with me sometimes.

And you slipped up wcm. You smiled. You aren't a real man.

loooooooooool :d

Rag Doll
11-07-2008, 10:47 AM
Well I DO have a penis... theres just a man attached to the end of it. Buuut he likes to share it with me sometimes.


Doesn't count.

Being a woman, you only have access to the equipment, what, 30-45 minutes a week, and that's on a good week. How can you have the same expertise as people who own this equipment and have access to it 24 hours a day their entire lives?

hshduppsnt
11-07-2008, 10:51 AM
Doesn't count.

Being a woman, you only have access to the equipment, what, 30-45 minutes a week, and that's on a good week. How can you have the same expertise as people who own this equipment and have access to it 24 hours a day their entire lives?

hahahahaha

+1 for quoting Seinfeld :)

nieh
11-07-2008, 11:09 AM
ow can you have the same expertise as people who own this equipment and have access to it 24 hours a day their entire lives?

Except for that one week a few years back....
*shudders at the memory*

Also, this. (http://www.anysonglyrics.com/lyrics/k/kingmissile/detatchablepenis.htm)

_Lost_
11-07-2008, 12:28 PM
Doesn't count.

Being a woman, you only have access to the equipment, what, 30-45 minutes a week, and that's on a good week. How can you have the same expertise as people who own this equipment and have access to it 24 hours a day their entire lives?

You make a good point. And this reminds me of a joke somebody told me a couple years ago.

Whats the useless piece of skin on the end of a man's penis?







His body. :p

JohnnyNemesis
11-07-2008, 02:04 PM
Doesn't count.

Being a woman, you only have access to the equipment, what, 30-45 minutes a week, and that's on a good week. How can you have the same expertise as people who own this equipment and have access to it 24 hours a day their entire lives?

i c wat u did thar :cool:;)

iPunk247
11-07-2008, 08:08 PM
mankind, sports; boobs; smokes; boobs; stakes; boobs; and need i say more.

_Lost_
11-07-2008, 09:44 PM
Real man??? (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uWLlUMzyh5c)

:D:D

WebDudette
11-08-2008, 02:53 AM
Kicking ass at Beer Pong is manly right?

iPunk247
11-21-2008, 08:07 PM
Dick Power is manly :D

Pussy Power is manly :D

Knowledge is manly :D

Hangovers is manly :D

JohnnyNemesis
11-21-2008, 08:19 PM
Shut the fuck etc.

EDIT: lol jk.

RickyCrack
11-21-2008, 09:41 PM
where did ozy go. I miss him/her. seriously does anybody know?

Hypno Toad
11-21-2008, 09:46 PM
p.s. Does she have a sister?

Better question, did she mention me?

Cock Joke
11-21-2008, 09:52 PM
This reminds me of the horrific The Man Show that they showed here a few years back. Why oh why.

That was the GREATEST SHOW EVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

T-6005
11-21-2008, 11:15 PM
Hangovers is manly :D
Hangovers are.

Manly grammar spree.

Seriously - you ever see a bitch (And by this I mean a gloriously inferior member of our species) get all uppity and be like "it's whom, motherfucker!"

?

wheelchairman
11-22-2008, 07:14 AM
You ever get corrected for saying 'anyways' instead of 'anyway.'

iPunk247
11-23-2008, 09:53 PM
hangovers are.

Manly grammar spree.

Seriously - you ever see a bitch (and by this i mean a gloriously inferior member of our species) get all uppity and be like "it's whom, motherfucker!"

?

i betcha you graduated from smart-ass university you manly prick!

0r4ng3
11-23-2008, 09:54 PM
Universities aren't manly. The manliest of grammar is self-taught.

iPunk247
11-23-2008, 10:30 PM
Shut the fuck etc.

EDIT: lol jk.

Lol, no you. =^.^=

Lizardus
11-23-2008, 10:41 PM
Universities aren't manly. The manliest of grammar is self-taught.

I'm so manly, my books read themselves.
And then burn.