View Full Version : For the first time ever..

03-13-2008, 07:10 AM
.. I'm getting paid today, and there's still quite a bit of money in my account from last week.

I just realised this a few minutes ago, and my mind started to go into overdrive. Holy shit, I'm growing up! Even a month ago, I was walking and talking with my best friend until 5-6am, with nothing but a couple of bottles of whiskey and the open road. 2 months ago, I was going to parties and falling over and generally making a complete dick of myself.

Last night I went to bed at 11pm because I always do, and I was tired. Yesterday morning, I had a chance to have a lie in, but I physically couldn't stay asleep past 9.30am. I just couldn't. It was too strange.

I'm actually a little melancholy about all this. Am I just being stupid?

03-13-2008, 07:44 AM
Aww, they grow so fast.

But yeah, it's generally a sign of reaching another step into adulthood when your responsabilities begin to suck away all your fun.

03-13-2008, 07:46 AM
Especially when it gets to the point that it becomes subconcious. But congratulations on still having money from last paycheck! I know how tough that is.

Mota Boy
03-13-2008, 07:56 AM
Steam of consciousness, kinda an answer.

No, it's normal to miss anything in life. Even eras of our lives that weren't particularly pleasant become softer and fuzzier with time. This is a bit different, however, in that is seems more momentous and irreversible - at the moment you're starting to leave behind something that you may never go back to. There's a since of innocence and freedom about youth that... you can't get back. I mean, sure, you can keep going to frat parties into your twenties, or never get a real job, or keep dating teenage blonds, but it becomes increasingly difficult to justify.

And being mature means worrying about shit. It means taking responsibility for yourself and others. That's kind of a drag. That's even kind of scary when it first happens (or, in the case of having a child, absolutely terrifying). To take it even further back, I remember vowing to myself as a child that I'd never be one of those "boring" adults; I was going to eat candy all the time and own the latest video game systems. That hasn't exactly petered out, and now it seems bizarre that I'd ever want that.

Similarly, I feel the college imperative to go out and get hammered on the weekends to be seeping out of me. It's... it's a part of you that's being replaced, and there's an urge not to let it happen, a feeling that you're still leaving so much of that life unlived.

The key, I think, is to never let a certain part of you die. Every phase of your life has both good and bad qualities, and sequester away the good parts just enough that, while not dominant, they're never far from reach. All the while, be mindful of the bad qualities to such a life, the youthful trade-off of immediate gratification, which cannot last forever in an ultimately happy life. I no longer get drunk on weeknights nor make mud pies, but I still will swing from branches (if a particularly horizontal branch juts out into the sidewalk on a beautiful day) and get appropriately drunk for KTV (Chinese karaoke). Remember the good times for what they were, always keep a bit of childlike joy, or don't-give-a-fuck adventuresomeness about you, and shift your attitude towards enjoy a quieter happiness based off of contentment and continued achievement, as opposed to the everlasting quest for consequence-free, temporary ecstasy that seems to define youth...

...though after writing that, I have a sudden urge to get a bottle of tequila, go on a roadtrip, get drunk and play air guitar atop a rock cliff.

03-13-2008, 08:10 AM
aw, i get that sometimes. like.. i'm married, have a job, pay my bills, wake up early, all that. and sometimes i get all like "shit, i'm old, botox time".

then i go give my dog a kool-aid dye job or smoke a joint, and all is well in the world (jk.. OR AM I)

in all seriousness though, mota boy said it very well. yes.

03-13-2008, 09:48 AM
Did you know that habitual marijuana use (or any drug for that matter) affects your emotional development?
Well, if there's one way to stay young...

03-13-2008, 09:56 AM
It's a trade-off. More choices in life simply means more stuff you're gonna choose not to do. You want the greatest degree of control and self-governance over your own life, sometimes that means giving up things you've loved for years. Sometimes it means having to put up with shit you never thought yourself capable of withstanding. Either way, you're learning stuff you wouldn't have known otherwise. Maybe you'll even learn something you never wanted to know.

Of course, you don't have to go all the way in either direction. Finding the perfect balance is one of the coolest things you can do in life.

03-13-2008, 10:34 AM
Did you know that habitual marijuana use (or any drug for that matter) affects your emotional development?
Well, if there's one way to stay young...

i would assume that escapism of any type (substance or behavior based) would stunt one's emotional growth... unless you're referring to a chemical property of thc i'm not aware of.

03-13-2008, 10:35 AM
Well stunt my emo and pour me a drink.

03-13-2008, 01:16 PM
As long as you don't spend this month's earnings on more expensive drinks... Next thing you know, you'll be complaining about the drunk kids who drive by your house with loud music when you're sleeping.

03-13-2008, 01:46 PM
Everybody is acting stupid now and then.

03-13-2008, 04:36 PM
As long as you don't spend this month's earnings on more expensive drinks... Next thing you know, you'll be complaining about the drunk kids who drive by your house with loud music when you're sleeping.

You can always get like double windows for extra protection against noise.
However, those punks trespassing on your lawn... should be shot.

Cock Joke
03-13-2008, 04:48 PM
Consider yourself lucky. I would love to be able to get up before 9:30 lickety-split. It'll be 10:00 and I'll still be too exhausted.

03-13-2008, 07:31 PM
I love this topic because growing up was sort of forced on me due to my self-inflicted circumstances, I left home at 17 and moved to another city where I knew one person. I'd never had a job before or nothing, no life experience to speak of.

Although I was naive idiot and a lot of my survival was probably based on people helping me out and taking me in etc because I had nothing else, it sort of forced me to grow up. Although I still did do a lot of stupid stuff but that's the fun of living so far away from all the people that would get heavy on you if they found out some of the things you did. I still can't for the life of me figure out how this works, except that it's survival instinct and sometimes you just can bullshit your way through.

Luckily that whole "maturity" thing kind of hit me in the face sometime in the last year, around my 20th birthday, now I really give a shit about not going out on the weekends if I've got too much on my plate (all the fucking time and its worse that I work weekends) whereas I somehow used to have weekends that started thursday night and ended sunday. I give a shit about how much I've got in the bank and make it last.

I figured out a way to curb this too much responsibility thing by telling my boss that I was taking 2 weeks off just for me, the first in the whole damn year, and it was really really good to be free of all the crap, except one week into it I found I was just too damn tired to do that much and I really crashed and burned and did a lot of sleeping.

Point is, have some sort of goal of being away from all the responsibility type stuff, that light at the end of the tunnel got me through a few really tough months where I just felt OLD.

03-14-2008, 06:08 AM
It's strange really, because none of this has been forced on me or happened all at once, like it did witj you, Nicole. I suppose it's been happening for a while, on a small level. When going out with some of my friends, even ones slightly older than me, their entire mission for the night was to get completely and totally smashed off their faces. For at least six months now, I haven't felt that urge. I don't like getting smashed off my tits anymore.

Even since I posted this though, wierd shit has been happening - possibly, even, as a result of this thread. I've been questioning things that I never questioned before, or at least haven't for a decade or more - my political standpoint, my religious beliefs. And oddly, I don't really want to fight it too much.

Oh, I don't really know what I'm saying.

03-14-2008, 06:13 AM
Just be happy you never took a loan. Or increased your credit limit (I believe this is what it's called in English.) I have friend who are 3000£ in debt. A lot of people I know have this kind of debt. Then they expand their credit and act like they got more money.

Naturally it starts when they're 18 and first offered a credit. They just go nuts. I'm pretty happy that when I was 18 I had the foresight to not take loans and go into my credit.

Naturally it means I can't go out and drink as often as they do. Which bums me out.

And the kind of student loans they take require no payments until after they are finished. But that doesn't stop the interest from piling up, holy shit. A loan of 3,800£ becomes 10,500£ by the end of it.

03-14-2008, 06:17 AM
I never got a credit card or any such venture simply because my brother got himself into shitloads of debt as a direct result of getting credit cards when he was 18. And he's still struggling now, years on.

The Talking Pie
03-14-2008, 10:42 AM
And the kind of student loans they take require no payments until after they are finished. But that doesn't stop the interest from piling up, holy shit. A loan of 3,800 becomes 10,500 by the end of it.

That's the old-school loan. Here, the average amount owed by the time you have to start paying it back is 30,000+. But there's an up-side; graduates earn, on average, 2,000 more than non-graduates. So you only have to hit your midlife crisis before it starts to pay for itself! Oh, except for the three or four years over which you didn't earn 30,000 - 50,000 like all the drop-outs, because you were 'studying'...

I have a credit card. I buy things on it. Expensive things sometimes. But I transfer the balance straight from my bank to pay it off before it's even due. Why on earth someone would want to spend money that they know they don't have is beyond me.

03-14-2008, 03:40 PM
Well if that's the case, why not just pay for stuff with your debit card? That's what I do, and it means if I don't have the money, I don't buy stuff. Simple.

The Talking Pie
03-14-2008, 04:01 PM
Because some stores are asses and only accept certain cards. Bastards.