PDA

View Full Version : Decisions



JoY
07-06-2008, 04:15 PM
how good are you guys at taking decisions?

I don't understand how terrible I am at taking small decisions, on like what I'll do next, within a day, within a week, within a month. but large decisions that will rest my life time, they always instinctively are exactly right. I don't understand why I'm so stupid, when I can be so smart & why I can be such a dreamer, when I'm so rational.

do the decisions you take turn out to be right, when you've thought about them, or when you felt it'd be good? how does that work? do the long-term decisions turn out to be great, or is it the short-term decisions that always go well?

I understand if this topic won't turn out to be very popular. it's a typical drunk dreamer Bella topic.

Andy
07-06-2008, 04:22 PM
So what's your latest bad decision?

Rag Doll
07-06-2008, 04:32 PM
i can't make small decisions either. what movie to rent, where to go for dinner, where i should stay that night, what color scarf to buy....etc. it's a lot of second guessing and trying to get other people to make decisions for me.

big decisions? sure, why not. i quit jobs without thinking. i based my decision for college based on the fact that they serve starbucks on campus.

my long term decisions generally turn out just fine. college turned out far better than it probably should have.

JoY
07-06-2008, 04:33 PM
small things, like what to wear, deciding to wear a summerdress, when it turns out to be raining like crazy. making plans for the evening, or the next day with people, that don't turn out to be rational, because I have too much to do to realise any plan at all. nothing huge. except maybe drinking & smoking too much too often, due to the fact I can't oversee future consequences. (although rationally I can)

JoY
07-06-2008, 04:34 PM
i can't make small decisions either. what movie to rent, where to go for dinner, where i should stay that night, what color scarf to buy....etc. it's a lot of second guessing and trying to get other people to make decisions for me.

big decisions? sure, why not. i quit jobs without thinking. i based my decision for college based on the fact that they serve starbucks on campus.

my long term decisions generally turn out just fine. college turned out far better than it probably should have.

oh I love you. that's exactly what I meant!!

Splinter[PI]
07-06-2008, 04:39 PM
I just do what comes to my mind. And if I decided something beforehand, I forgot it until then.

Little_Miss_1565
07-06-2008, 04:45 PM
I can easily make well-informed decisions and quickly...if they're for other people. Over the course of an evening, I can with the company of a bottle of wine and my laptop put together a faaantastic marketing plan. But, what do I want to eat for lunch? What do I want to do today? Useless.

Rag Doll
07-06-2008, 04:49 PM
I can easily make well-informed decisions and quickly...if they're for other people. Over the course of an evening, I can with the company of a bottle of wine and my laptop put together a faaantastic marketing plan.

Exactly. I made the plans for a $20,000 order for the department I run in the same fashion. Because hey, why not. And it isn't as serious a matter as what color eyeshadow I should wear.

nieh
07-06-2008, 05:17 PM
I normally have a really hard time making decisions. Smaller things I tend to be too indifferent towards, while bigger things I tend to think so much about that I can see equal positives and negatives about every choice.

come out swinging
07-06-2008, 07:08 PM
small things, like what to wear, deciding to wear a summerdress, when it turns out to be raining like crazy. making plans for the evening, or the next day with people, that don't turn out to be rational, because I have too much to do to realise any plan at all. nothing huge. except maybe drinking & smoking too much too often, due to the fact I can't oversee future consequences. (although rationally I can)


Smoke an L and then make a decision. Dont ever stress on little shit. Follow your dreams and go with the flow.

Harnum
07-06-2008, 07:13 PM
I think that you find the big decisions easy because you know so much about the outcomes like Josh said. It's well thought over and all the angles are looked at.

Small decisions are usually left undecided or just randomly picked because they're spur of the moment. It takes a lot longer to think about small things when they just pop up, especially if you're in a rush. I am really bad for this too. I can never decide on planning or anything, so I leave the festivities to my friends. =]

wheelchairman
07-07-2008, 02:29 AM
I don't find decision-making to be difficult and I find it annoying when people taaaaaake forever to decide something. (particularly at restaurants.)

And I'm generally not a negative person so I think the decisions I made must have been good because the results have been. I obviously can't foresee what would've happened had I made other choices.

JoY
07-07-2008, 03:12 AM
I don't find decision-making to be difficult and I find it annoying when people taaaaaake forever to decide something. (particularly at restaurants.)

And I'm generally not a negative person so I think the decisions I made must have been good because the results have been. I obviously can't foresee what would've happened had I made other choices.

wowowow, food.. is a bigbigBIG decision. food is important. takes me about a second. even beforehand, I can say there's a 99% chance tonight's dinner will be a piece of cow.

anyway, there are things that are so majorly complicated, no one really gets it a 100%. why do I dig psychiatry, when the job's really fucking whiny? what is it, matters of the heart? what's with them? have I gotten to know myself that well, or something? it's just strange. some people take forever knowing what to pick for a future. somehow I've got that part pretty clear, but small things I fuss about. who to call to hang out with, where to go, what to do...

also, 1565, like you I'm mostly better at making decisions if it concerns other people. or well, usually I talk with them & ask questions until they know. conversations in which I try to pull what they really want to the surface.

killer_queen
07-07-2008, 05:57 AM
I'm very good at making small decisions and people who aren't really annoy me. Especially the ones who keep asking for your opinion but doesn't really care about it.

But when it comes to big decisions I'm not very lucky about that. My dad is a real jerk and he thinks he literally knows everything and is sure what my talents are, what I should be in the future. And since he is my financial source I can't do anything about it.

ad8
07-07-2008, 05:57 AM
I mostly don't think about the decisions I make. Later, I notice if it was a good/bad decision but it's never been so bad that it made me think about further decisions. Actually, my decisions are acceptable quite often.

Sunny
07-07-2008, 06:24 AM
i'm pretty good at making big decisions, but absolutely worthless at making small ones. the big ones have, so far, worked out rather well, and i generally don't agonize over "life decisions". like, oh, i feel like packing all my shit and moving somewhere else.. yeah? YEAH! decision made!

little stuff, though...ugh. it takes me a good while to decide which flavor of vitamin water i really want (seriously) which dish i should order, which song i want to play... etc. i'm a pain in the ass to shop with or get manicures with for that very reason. picking out the *right* nail polish color is a long and involved process in sunnyville, let me tell you.

i'm not really bothered by it, though... like, i have no desire to work to change it. i'm perfectly fine standing there being like "hmm... orange.. or purple? hm. purple. no, wait. orange. wait no... PURPLE! YEAH!". it doesn't affect my quality of life in any way, and if other people are bothered by it, well, fuck them. if they don't like it, they don't have to go shopping with me. ;D

Llamas
07-07-2008, 12:45 PM
i based my decision for college based on the fact that they serve starbucks on campus.

I picked my University based on the fact that they had a large marching band that got to travel to other states and had a particular marching style. ...that sounds sooooo incredibly retarded now. Yet I have no regrets about where I went to school, haha.

I like making big decisions. I spend hours weighing ideas, talking to friends for ideas, etc. I usually think I made the right choice later on. But small decisions... I always make the wrong one, and feel like a moron afterward. Boo.

Bipolar Bear
07-07-2008, 06:25 PM
Personally, I hate making big decisions, and deciding something of any importance for fear
of making the wrong choice or changing my mind. This leads to procrastination and ultimately
personal failure. I know this, yet I can't stop.

lost_nvrfound
07-10-2008, 09:54 PM
i no longer make decisions for myself... if i do it, that decision just tends to screw me over... now i just let society tell me which way i should go next.

i really do hate making decisions. they never seem to work out for me. i decided on a college based on which school was farthest from home without going out of state. now i'm straddling two completely opposite majors and i'm fine with that because that way i just go with whichever one i get a job in first.

TheUnholyNightbringer
07-11-2008, 12:19 AM
Strangely, I haven't had to make any large life-decisions just yet, except to decide to train in IT. All my big decisions, I've just kinda drifted into - I'm moving to Wales soon with my girlfriend and a friend, and that came about because, one day, we decided we hated Birmingham. So, we're moving to Wales.

Little decisions I'm brilliant on. I hate people who say "It's up to you" or "I don't mind". I used to get really annoyed at this, but now I'll pick up a film or a dinner that I know they'll hate. Either they'll squirm, which is satisfying, or they'll say "But I didn't want that one", to which I reply, "Shoulda said something, then."

JoY
07-11-2008, 05:06 PM
I mostly don't think about the decisions I make. Later, I notice if it was a good/bad decision but it's never been so bad that it made me think about further decisions. Actually, my decisions are acceptable quite often.

same here, but somehow they turn out to be the right decisions, if I hadn't thought about them, but just somehow knew. I don't get the "somehow knew"-part. why would I have known that my enthousiasm for some things wouldn't die, wouldn't dry out. why can't I instinctively make decisions the same way when it comes to small things?


i'm pretty good at making big decisions, but absolutely worthless at making small ones. the big ones have, so far, worked out rather well, and i generally don't agonize over "life decisions". like, oh, i feel like packing all my shit and moving somewhere else.. yeah? YEAH! decision made!

little stuff, though...ugh. it takes me a good while to decide which flavor of vitamin water i really want (seriously) which dish i should order, which song i want to play... etc. i'm a pain in the ass to shop with or get manicures with for that very reason. picking out the *right* nail polish color is a long and involved process in sunnyville, let me tell you.

i'm not really bothered by it, though... like, i have no desire to work to change it. i'm perfectly fine standing there being like "hmm... orange.. or purple? hm. purple. no, wait. orange. wait no... PURPLE! YEAH!". it doesn't affect my quality of life in any way, and if other people are bothered by it, well, fuck them. if they don't like it, they don't have to go shopping with me. ;D

totally the same here. & nah, usually it doesn't bother me when small decisions turn out to be the wrong ones. it's more that it surprises me so many of the big decisions turn out to be the right ones. I can't get over it.


I picked my University based on the fact that they had a large marching band that got to travel to other states and had a particular marching style. ...that sounds sooooo incredibly retarded now. Yet I have no regrets about where I went to school, haha.

I like making big decisions. I spend hours weighing ideas, talking to friends for ideas, etc. I usually think I made the right choice later on. But small decisions... I always make the wrong one, and feel like a moron afterward. Boo.

it doesn't sound that retarded. there was a positive side to it from the start & that made it feel right. I picked my high school, because I liked the building. THE BUILDING. alright, that turned out to be somewhat of a mistake, but still I'd like to believe in the end it'll be in my advance that I chose the high school that I chose.

as I said, I usually don't feel too bad when I've made a relatively insignificant decision that turned out to be not so good, but when I compare it to decisions that turn out well, I do feel like an idiot. like, I can choose the perfect guy for me, at least one I can stick with for 4 years, while I never thought that was possible. but I don't know whether to order pizza, or cook some Indonesian food for myself & end up not eating at all.


Strangely, I haven't had to make any large life-decisions just yet, except to decide to train in IT. All my big decisions, I've just kinda drifted into - I'm moving to Wales soon with my girlfriend and a friend, and that came about because, one day, we decided we hated Birmingham. So, we're moving to Wales.

Little decisions I'm brilliant on. I hate people who say "It's up to you" or "I don't mind". I used to get really annoyed at this, but now I'll pick up a film or a dinner that I know they'll hate. Either they'll squirm, which is satisfying, or they'll say "But I didn't want that one", to which I reply, "Shoulda said something, then."

hey, those ARE large life-decisions. moving to Wales definitely falls under a large life-decision. maybe you don't think it is, maybe it's a man's thing, but it so is.

yellow
07-12-2008, 06:41 AM
same here, but somehow they turn out to be the right decisions, if I hadn't thought about them, but just somehow knew. I don't get the "somehow knew"-part. why would I have known that my enthousiasm for some things wouldn't die, wouldn't dry out. why can't I instinctively make decisions the same way when it comes to small things?



totally the same here. & nah, usually it doesn't bother me when small decisions turn out to be the wrong ones. it's more that it surprises me so many of the big decisions turn out to be the right ones. I can't get over it.



it doesn't sound that retarded. there was a positive side to it from the start & that made it feel right. I picked my high school, because I liked the building. THE BUILDING. alright, that turned out to be somewhat of a mistake, but still I'd like to believe in the end it'll be in my advance that I chose the high school that I chose.

as I said, I usually don't feel too bad when I've made a relatively insignificant decision that turned out to be not so good, but when I compare it to decisions that turn out well, I do feel like an idiot. like, I can choose the perfect guy for me, at least one I can stick with for 4 years, while I never thought that was possible. but I don't know whether to order pizza, or cook some Indonesian food for myself & end up not eating at all.



hey, those ARE large life-decisions. moving to Wales definitely falls under a large life-decision. maybe you don't think it is, maybe it's a man's thing, but it so is.

it is my opinion and advice that u should listen to ur heart and ur inner voice. u might be having trouble with the little decisions because of fear or anxiety about missing out on something better. u could try thinking things thru to antcipate outcomes, consequences or how u will be effected to help decide what is best for u

JoY
07-12-2008, 06:53 AM
thoroughly thinking things through & weighing possible outcomes doesn't have much to do with listening to my heart, does it? ;p

yellow
07-12-2008, 07:06 AM
thoroughly thinking things through & weighing possible outcomes doesn't have much to do with listening to my heart, does it? ;p
yes it does. thinking things thru helps u make the right decisions so that ur heart is getting what it wants to love. sometimes it is a series of small decision in life that brings u the success u desire. weighing out options helps u see how u will accomplish ur goal or have ur hearts desire and prevent ur heart from being broken. someone told me once to "always follow ur heart and u will never be defeated"
this is just my opinion. i hope u always make the right decision that r in ur best interest.

JoY
07-12-2008, 08:50 AM
thank you. well, I've been very well able to prevent a broken heart for the past 4 years, when it comes to love. I haven't always been able to make the right decisions when it came to my study, but as it appears I've been doing quite a good job at that too for the past 3 years. I can't complain, really. this thread wasn't meant to complain either. the reason for making it were the large decisions that turned out well, not the small ones that turned out badly. although many of the small decisions for myself turn out to be lousy.

Keyser
07-12-2008, 02:06 PM
I have no problems making decisions, the only problem is that most of the times I dont think much before making some. The decisions turn out bad then, tough in 99% of the situations I can make things right again.

Tizzalicious
07-13-2008, 09:24 AM
I think I'm better at big decisions than at small ones. Big ones are usally...okay, I want THIS so, that's what I'll do. It was like that with deciding what to study, and what to study again, and about opening my shop, registering it, moving for Per, etc.

Small ones are harder, I guess because the difference between the choices is smaller, so there's not that clear THIS is what I want line, as oposed to..THAT.

Do I make any sense here?

Nina
07-13-2008, 10:47 AM
I don't understand how terrible I am at taking small decisions, on like what I'll do next, within a day, within a week, within a month. but large decisions that will rest my life time, they always instinctively are exactly right. I don't understand why I'm so stupid, when I can be so smart & why I can be such a dreamer, when I'm so rational.


I read a psychological article about this and it was quite interesting. It said that studies have shown how most people make big decisions very quickly and when asked a few months later will be happy with it still, while the smaller decisions take forever and when they dont put enough thought in it they will be unsatisfied with the consequences.

They said this is because big decisions will usually be made by our gut instincts while we prefer to solve the smaller stuff "logically".

In general the article said that it's quite useful for many people to wait a day and sleep the night for well decision-making, because we process our thoughts in our sleep and tie connections to what is new and what we have already experienced in the past.

That makes sense, I guess.

I personally make decisions very easily, whether they are big or small doesnt matter (very unlike what the article said). I usually have the tendency to cut my hair spontaneously, buy clothing sometimes even without trying it on first, and deciding what I want for lunch. The big decisions take comparatively short as well; when I want to change my life (or when it's of necessity) I think about it all the time, talk to my loved ones about it, research till I drop, and then start to plan everything obsessively until I feel the plans have reached perfection. Then, when the time has come, I'll change everything anyway. But I'll be sooo happy with the result, which I only achieved because I planned all of it first.