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View Full Version : A plan to improve the spelling of the English language.



Zebulon
07-10-2008, 11:41 AM
For example, in Year 1 that useless letter "c" would be dropped to be replased either by "k" or "s", and likewise "x" would no longer be part of the alphabet. The only kase in which "c" would be retained would be the "ch" formation, which will be dealt with later. Year 2 might reform "w" spelling, so that "which" and "one" would take the same konsonant, wile Year 3 might well abolish "y" replasing it with "i" and iear 4 might fiks the "g/j" anomali wonse and for all.

Generally, then, the improvement would kontinue iear bai iear with iear 5 doing awai with useless double konsonants, and iears 6-12 or so modifaiing vowlz and the rimeiniing voist and unvoist konsonants. Bai iear 15 or sou, it wud fainali bi posibl tu meik ius ov thi ridandant letez "c", "y" and "x"— bai now jast a memori in the maindz ov ould doderez —tu riplais "ch", "sh", and "th" rispektivili.

Fainali, xen, aafte sam 20 iers ov orxogrefkl riform, wi wud hev alojikl, kohirnt speling in ius xrewawt xe Ingliy-spiking werld.

0r4ng3
07-10-2008, 11:42 AM
Ironically, that would actually be an improvement for some people here.

H1T_That
07-10-2008, 12:39 PM
I bet you had to read that quite a few times to make sure you had followed your own rules..

ad8
07-10-2008, 12:45 PM
Fainali, xen, aafte sam 20 iers ov orxogrefkl riform, wi wud hev alojikl, kohirnt speling in ius xrewawt xe Ingliy-spiking werld.

That reminds me of the way that german children learn how to pronounce english words in the right way.

Pretty funny parody on the gamer/kiddy internet language, anyway.

Endymion
07-10-2008, 01:03 PM
the copy/pasta is not so good today, please send it back.

Bipolar Bear
07-10-2008, 02:11 PM
That was really amazing, good job.
:cool:

Cock Joke
07-10-2008, 03:03 PM
Hah! My friend sent me an email with that sorta thing.

IamSam
07-10-2008, 03:25 PM
Inflationary Language (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YY6kElOYcd8)

Tijs
07-10-2008, 03:40 PM
Fun video, but the Dutch subtitles are distracting me because they make up their own 'number-words'.

adombomb222
07-10-2008, 03:45 PM
I enjoyed that video... But the subtitles make me thing. Wouldn't the joke be lost in translation?

Bipolar Bear
07-10-2008, 04:12 PM
Ha yeah now that I think of it he probably copy pasted it from a website
Nice video by the way

Tijs
07-10-2008, 04:30 PM
I enjoyed that video... But the subtitles make me thing. Wouldn't the joke be lost in translation?The joke's still there, but a lot less funny.

Rag Doll
07-10-2008, 04:34 PM
Ha yeah now that I think of it he probably copy pasted it from a website


http://www.plainlanguage.gov/examples/humor/marktwain.cfm

i got a headache reading that. as already said though, an improvement from some stuff i've read on the internet.

Bipolar Bear
07-10-2008, 04:35 PM
Mark Twain, you have impressed me yet again!
What an incredible man *wipes tear*
He was seriously funny though

sk8ter-hater
07-10-2008, 07:41 PM
this pasta is cold :(

lost_nvrfound
07-10-2008, 10:30 PM
Cripes! It took me nearly ten minutes to figure out most of what it said. You've gotta hand it to him though, (Mark Twain), thats good stuff.

It makes me think of those cell phone commercials where the daughter speaks entirely in acronyms. If one types in nothing but text message slang, does that person still count as literate?

Duskygrin
07-13-2008, 08:15 AM
That's unbelievably great.

That also puts me in mind of some story by Poe, "X-ing a paragrab" I think it's called.