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View Full Version : I'm having one of those days...



lost_nvrfound
08-12-2008, 11:14 PM
You know, the whole "I'm so messed up" type day, where everything about me and what I'm doing just seems so wrong and pathetic.

GreenTerror
08-12-2008, 11:24 PM
No moar hope for bettar dayz :(:(:(:(, etc...

lost_nvrfound
08-12-2008, 11:27 PM
yep... pretty much... one of those super emo, self loathing type days... complete with the whole "quoting linkin park" thing

Betty
08-12-2008, 11:44 PM
Do you want to talk about it...??

lost_nvrfound
08-12-2008, 11:53 PM
IDk... its like, I'm leaving for school in like a week. thats supposed to be exciting right? well i'm not. people keep saying "oh thats just nervousness" and bull like that but its not. And, idk, i guess i regret not going for the schools i really wanted go to.

but its also, well... theres this guy i met over the summer. the problem is, he's engaged. I keep finding myself going to his work and shit like that, but half the time when i'm there i can't eve bring myself to talk to him. And there's like this whole chemistry thing going on, and EVERYONE sees it and they all make jokes about us together. and its all really starting to get to me and... ughh!

it doesn't help that he's a grad student here in my home town and i'm headed elsewhere for school... people keep telling me "oh its not that far" but it doesn't change the fact that he's engaged and that it makes me ill to think of seriously trying to break them up...

EDIT: and it all just leaves me feeling like a pitiful mess...

Betty
08-13-2008, 12:18 AM
So I need to get some things straight... you're leaving for college? First year? Res? How far from home?

lost_nvrfound
08-13-2008, 12:23 AM
yeah, i'm living on campus about an hour and a half from home

Rag Doll
08-13-2008, 12:24 AM
Leave the situation with the guy alone.

I had a situation sort of like yours...except he actually cheated on his fiancee numerous times. Not only did I feel like a horrid bitch afterwards (at the time, I enjoyed myself....ahem)....but I felt even worse when they would like, argue all the time, and he would talk to me about it. Like, then he was even emotionally cheating, you know? Eugh. Just get OUT of that situation. Seriously. There is no possible way it can end well for anyone involved.

lost_nvrfound
08-13-2008, 12:27 AM
well, I can understand that. Part of why i am so conflicted is that if we were to act upon it, if he were still with his fiance, then he'd be a cheating scum bastard and i'd want nothing to do with him... i'd lose all respect for him then

Rag Doll
08-13-2008, 12:29 AM
Which just proves that there is absolutely nothing good that could possibly come from the situation.

lost_nvrfound
08-13-2008, 12:33 AM
Which just proves that there is absolutely nothing good that could possibly come from the situation.

i know... and thats part of why i feel like i'm so messed up

Betty
08-13-2008, 12:35 AM
I feel like I'm going to say what "everyone else" is saying, and I hate to do it, but I think I'm gonna have to, cause it's just true.

Going to school is going to be amazing. I don't care if you're excited about it yet - it's fine if you're not. You'll find out when you get there. Two of the most fun periods of my life were starting undergrad and starting grad school. I can assume you're leaving home for the first time too? Living in res is amazing. You'll meet so many people so quickly and easily and make great friends. Nobody knows anybody, and nobody knows anything ABOUT anybody. You'll start a new life. You'll be on your own. You can become a totally new person if you want to. You can choose your new friends, and which crowd you want to hang around with (that in itself can be a little stressful). School itself will be hit or miss, but embrace the social side of it at the very least.

I don't know about the guy situation. It sounds messy in general, and I've gone through a lot of similar drama, but I don't really want to give advice on that. I say just let it go though. Just drop everything you're dealing with and start fresh. And even if you're not prepared to do it, you're going to do it anyway as soon as you leave and realize there's a whole new world out there and new people to get to know. You just don't know it yet if you haven't lived it. But it'll probably be even better if you fully embrace the experience and go in with an open mind.

Rag Doll
08-13-2008, 12:35 AM
Just try to forget him. Try to think positive about going away to school. In fact, think about all the cute and single guys you will probably meet while you're there!

As soon as you go away and get into the swing of things and start meeting people, you'll totally forget about engaged whatshisface.

lost_nvrfound
08-13-2008, 12:39 AM
*cue fantasy of hot surfer types playing football in the courtyard*

EDIT: I forgot to include that they are all shirtless and in good shape...