PDA

View Full Version : dear australians



Sunny
09-25-2008, 09:33 AM
you're nasty.

more specifically, your taste in alcohol upsets me.
one of my clients is an australian wine company, and i've come to realize that you people are HUGE on disgusting alcohol, especially sweetened fortified wines. MARSHMALLOW flavored? orange chili flavored? pomegranate raspberry flavored? it's wine with sweetened fruit syrup, for god's sake... and this stuff is popular, too.

fucking sick.

justin, if you're reading this, you ought to be ashamed. your people are wusses. this stuff is what nightmares are made of.

T-6005
09-25-2008, 09:42 AM
Australians have no taste buds. They all like Vegemite.

sipptaroowsky
09-25-2008, 10:00 AM
Australians are great when it comes to alcohol. But when it comes to the number one alcoholic country in the world, it's not Russia, not Scotland...It is the fatherland. Australians have got some seriously good taste

F@ BANKZ
09-25-2008, 10:25 AM
Australians have no taste buds. They all like Vegemite.

I agrees. I mean, Foster's; come on.

Autonomist
09-25-2008, 10:37 AM
I would never touch any of the alcohols described in the first post and Fosters is far from my favourite beer. The jab at Vegemite seriously offends me though :(.

I'd also like to note the following quote, just now fast-tracked from wiki:

While popular in many countries, particularly where it is brewed locally, Foster's Lager does not enjoy widespread success in Australia. As a bottled beer produced by the Foster's Group (formerly the Carlton United Beverages group (CUB)) it is rarely promoted in Australia.

Rag Doll
09-25-2008, 03:50 PM
whoa whoa whoa.

I have never heard of this wine. I have spent too much time NOT working in the liquor industry apparently.

Who puts this shit out? PM me if you don't want everyone to get an idea of who you work for.

Cock Joke
09-25-2008, 08:40 PM
That stuff sounds pretty fucking nasty indeed.

sipptaroowsky
09-29-2008, 07:46 AM
That stuff sounds pretty fucking nasty indeed.

I thought at least you would apretiate the good things in life

Andy
09-29-2008, 07:56 PM
To be fair, they can brew good beer. VB and Tooey's New rank highly for Andy.

mrconeman
09-30-2008, 07:34 AM
The Austrailians are up there with the English, Scottish and Americans for making exceedingly terrible beer.

Fosters? Carling? Tennents? Miller? Clearly these people have no taste buds.

H1T_That
09-30-2008, 07:37 AM
I really don't mind fosters lager.

Autonomist
09-30-2008, 07:52 AM
Fosters? Carling? Tennents? Miller? Clearly these people have no taste buds.

Apart from having already explained that Fosters is famous for being the Australian beer that noone in Australia drinks, I've never even heard of the last three! The most popular lagers over here are VB, Carlton and Tooheys, all three of which are the quality Australian brew should be judged upon.

mrconeman
09-30-2008, 09:53 AM
The last three were English, Scottish and American.
All four are horrible beers.

H1T_That
10-01-2008, 03:38 AM
I was at the shop yesterday, and noticed the Carling tins. Apparently theres been some sort of ingredient change or something, so i decided to get a 10 pack. I can safely say its as horrible as ever.

sKratch
10-01-2008, 10:12 PM
On a slightly unrelated note, my friends have an Aussie bumming at their house until his visa is up. He said that Americans can drink Australians under the table from his experience here (my friends are alcoholics).

Sin Studly
10-27-2008, 02:20 AM
Yes, I'm reading this because I'm such a godawful egotist I get drunk and use the search function for my own name every 4-6 months.

Secondly, all that awful-sounding dogpiss you mentioned is most probably for export only. We're pretty damn prolific when it comes to shipping terrible alcohol to less fortunate nations. Major example ; fosters beer, which I've never so much as heard an urban legend of an Australian drinking it.

Thirdly ; the most popular drinks in Australia include a beer that's almost solid with chunks of fermented yeast clumps, and a rum that invariably gives people severe intestinal bleeding after drinking any amount of it. I've never met anyone who can't drink homemade grappa and spirytus rektifikowany straight. My people are not wusses.

And finally, vegemite is fucking awesome and anyone who disagrees is the tasteless faggot ; not us.

SK8rocka
10-27-2008, 02:27 AM
lol im australian and i hate vegemite and i HATE australian beer, i only drink burbon. The only thing that is good about australia is the outback and scenary, and the chicks..

Splinter[PI]
10-27-2008, 02:40 AM
I was at the shop yesterday, and noticed the Carling tins. Apparently theres been some sort of ingredient change or something, so i decided to get a 10 pack. I can safely say its as horrible as ever.

Carling? You mean, the Carling I posted some pictures of in the Photo Album #3?

Carling tastes good.

Sin Studly
10-27-2008, 02:43 AM
The outback is good? The outback is a desolate wasteland forsaken by God, and populated only by venomous snakes, carnivorous insects that chew pieces off your living flesh and leave you with festering infectious sores, and alcoholic spear-chucking blackfellas. It's fifty celsius during the day and below zero at night, with duststorms and willy-willies that will skin you alive, and every single living creature can and will kill you.

I was born and bred in the outback, so don't talk to me about it. It's nothing but a Hell for those unfortunate enough to still be alive in it. That it makes for pretty postcards for idiots who know no better doesn't change that fact. It is an honest-to-God living Hell.

T-6005
10-27-2008, 10:23 AM
The vegemite comment wasn't really serious - but I do find it pretty telling that Kraft is too ashamed to put its company name on the label when it's sold anywhere other than Australia.

SK8rocka
10-27-2008, 01:54 PM
The vegemite comment wasn't really serious - but I do find it pretty telling that Kraft is too ashamed to put its company name on the label when it's sold anywhere other than Australia.

Ahh man here's the label thing, meh..


ok.
AUSTRALIA DOSN'T OWN VEGEMITE NOMORE

America brought it from us.

oh and by the way.

Those of you who like mowing the lawn with motor engines..

We Envented The Electric Lawnmower.

And the Holden

And the Blackbox

And the Speedo (can be a good thang or a bad thang..)

And Most importantly... Dane Edna


Blurgggh!!!

JoY
10-28-2008, 07:13 AM
Sunny, that wine you described sounds like something that'd make me barf.

although I'm known for liking sweet sugary shit every once in a while. but not like that. *shakes head*