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View Full Version : Would You Survive the Zombie Apocalypse?



T-6005
03-19-2009, 09:27 AM
Because honestly, I don't see myself making it out uneaten.

Outerspaceman21
03-19-2009, 09:47 AM
Well, it would be the undead and they would be decaying and have rigormortis, so they would be slow moving.

I would bunker down in a high place like an attic and chill there for a while. If there are too many, I would get to my truck and drive out of there and head to a different, more secure location. There is a small planned community dow the street from me with a brick surrounding the entire community

And there are some empty two story houses surrounded by a huge brick wall. I would try there too.

As for supplies, this would be tricky. I would stick with looting other houses.

T-6005
03-19-2009, 09:49 AM
I'm not assuming that zombies are superhumanly strong or fast, but I am going with the idea that they're crazy and that they definitely want to eat me.

Because of that, I'm going with regular mobility - slow-moving zombies are too lame. Seriously.

Outerspaceman21
03-19-2009, 09:51 AM
I'm not assuming that zombies are superhumanly strong or fast, but I am going with the idea that they're crazy and that they definitely want to eat me.

Because of that, I'm going with regular mobility - slow-moving zombies are too lame. Seriously.

THey may be lame, but it makes sense. So are we going with the 28 Days Later zombies?

Rooster
03-19-2009, 09:57 AM
I've always wanted to be a zombie...

T-6005
03-19-2009, 10:14 AM
I've always wanted to be a zombie...

So you're a definite no on the survival front.

Grimesy da Offspringfan
03-19-2009, 10:42 AM
it depends..are these particular zombies like the ones in the Resident Evil games/movies (except the crimson heads), or are they like the ones in Dawn Of The Dead

randman21
03-19-2009, 11:12 AM
regular mobility
Oh, fuck that. The anticipation of being eaten alive by zombies, then actually being eaten alive by zombies is no way to live. I'd probably just take one big inhalation of chloroform and let what happens happen.

ninthz
03-19-2009, 11:18 AM
I was watching Dawn of the Dead last night and talking about Zombie survival with my zomgBFF. I live in Iowa City: a small town with an extremely dense population. I would be straight fucked.

nieh
03-19-2009, 11:28 AM
Traditional, slow-moving zombies I'm pretty sure I'd be able to deal with for at least a while. New age fast zombies (28 days later, even though they insist they weren't zombies, and the new Dawn of the Dead) I'm not so sure. I can be pretty quick when I need to be, but don't know if I'd be able to keep up as long as those guys.

Andy
03-19-2009, 11:31 AM
I've seen enough zombie movies to know that I would survive long enough to find a secure militarised location.

That is, if I can find some firepower - without firepower you're straight fucked.

Rag Doll
03-19-2009, 11:31 AM
I would survive. Simply because my boyfriend and I routinely make plans for the impending zombie invasion and the impending Mist that is going to arrive.

Sinister
03-19-2009, 11:32 AM
I think I'd just take all the painkillers and alcohol available, and skip the whole painful part. In fact I think either the meds or the alcohol (parents' wine cellar ftw) would be enough, but I'd play 'safe'.

Outerspaceman21
03-19-2009, 11:35 AM
it depends..are these particular zombies like the ones in the Resident Evil games/movies (except the crimson heads), or are they like the ones in Dawn Of The Dead

Those are exactly the same...

They are both slow moving.

nieh
03-19-2009, 11:35 AM
Those are exactly the same...

They are both slow moving.

Not in the remake, which I'm assuming is what he was referring to.

Jebus
03-19-2009, 11:36 AM
oh c'mon. Regular moving zombies is way too unfair for humanity. The point of the zombie mythos is that they're dangerous in great numbers, but fairly harmless individually. Thus the reason for their slow speed. You might as well put us up against thousands of super Saiyan Gokus. We'd be doomed either way.

Grimesy da Offspringfan
03-19-2009, 12:04 PM
yeah what's scary in a shuffling guy with bloody face? that's more like funny, like, Ozzy-funny

Cock Joke
03-19-2009, 12:07 PM
I am a zombie! MWAHAHAHA

ninthz
03-19-2009, 12:16 PM
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/c/c2/Zombiesurvivalguide.jpg
I've read this several times and I'm still realistic enough to realize that population density stacks the odds against me. Can't wait to get destroyed by frat zombies.

Oh, and Sinister, way to further your image.

Outerspaceman21
03-19-2009, 12:23 PM
Not in the remake, which I'm assuming is what he was referring to.

That is not a remake, THAT IS SHIT IN A FILM REEL.

please, filmmakers, do one thing for me; STOP REMAKING HORROR MOVIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!

nieh
03-19-2009, 12:24 PM
Have you read World War Z by Brooks? It's done like one of those post WWII books where it's just a collection of interviews with a bunch of different people each with their own story of survival. Each chapter is basically its own little zombie survival story that unveils a little piece of the bigger story behind it all. It's awesome.

Outerspaceman21
03-19-2009, 12:28 PM
yeah what's scary in a shuffling guy with bloody face? that's more like funny, like, Ozzy-funny

It's not about getting scared. This is a zombie apocalypse, it's about survival.

To expand on what jebus said, undead zombies are decaying and have rigor mortis, which means a fast moving zombie makes no sense. Thats why all of George A. Romero's movies have slow movings zombies. It makes no sense any other way. They'd fall apart if they tried to move faster.

Grimesy da Offspringfan
03-19-2009, 01:05 PM
I've seen enough zombie movies to know that I would survive long enough to find a secure militarised location.

That is, if I can find some firepower - without firepower you're straight fucked.

So ares yous sayings thats wheres yous comes froms theres nos stuffs likes this?
http://s1.images.www.tvn.hu/2009/03/19/20/04/www.tvn.hu_d55b242a7cc43eaa298b3013a448e160.jpg

Conspiracyof1000
03-19-2009, 01:07 PM
I would probably not survive the zombie apocalypse.

Knowing me, I'd probably be one of the zombies you're trying to escape from.

ninthz
03-19-2009, 02:37 PM
Have you read World War Z by Brooks? It's done like one of those post WWII books where it's just a collection of interviews with a bunch of different people each with their own story of survival. Each chapter is basically its own little zombie survival story that unveils a little piece of the bigger story behind it all. It's awesome.
Not yet, but I'm sure I will eventually. It's one of those things I've been putting off.

Flux
03-19-2009, 04:41 PM
I have a bunker 100's of miles underground. Iíll survive.

jacknife737
03-19-2009, 09:11 PM
World War Z is a pretty fun read.

http://i56.photobucket.com/albums/g178/jacknife737/1225179974800.jpg

T-6005
03-19-2009, 09:28 PM
I wasn't aware that this was a realistic topic.

You dick.

ninthz
03-19-2009, 10:06 PM
RC is a fag.

Budzy
03-20-2009, 12:45 AM
I'd become a zombie. Why not? Everyone else is doing it.

Paint_It_Black
03-20-2009, 12:58 AM
That is not a remake, THAT IS SHIT IN A FILM REEL.

The original is complete crap unless it is supposed to be funny, and I seem to remember Romero saying that it was not intended to be funny. So it's just crap.

The remake was a nearly perfect example of what a zombie movie should be, and just a generally good movie. Good directing, decent acting, decent story, great music, great make-up and effects, good dialogue...seriously, what's not to like?

I will die quickly when the zombie apocalypse begins. Not by some lame suicide like Sinister (life is pain, faggot) but because I have absolutely no survival skills. You could arm me to the teeth and it wouldn't do any good unless all the weapons came with instruction manuals. Why do everyone in movies seem to know how to shoot guns?

Best I could hope for would be some heroic last stand. I'll hold them off for 5 seconds while you run kind of thing.

bighead384
03-20-2009, 01:11 AM
What good does it do you to survive? Even if you invented a friggin' zombie force field, there wouldn't be much of a point to living anymore. The world as you know it would be destroyed, many people you know would die, and every day will be based around escaping zombies.

Paint_It_Black
03-20-2009, 01:16 AM
The world as you know it would be destroyed, many people you know would die, and every day will be based around escaping zombies.

I'm getting this weird feeling that you consider that a bad thing.

Freak.

Jebus
03-20-2009, 01:30 AM
I always wanted to die yelling "There's too many of them!" as my last words so I welcome our new Zombie overlords.

PS: The Walking Dead (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Walking_Dead). Read it.

Paint_It_Black
03-20-2009, 01:39 AM
I always wanted to die yelling "There's too many of them!" as my last words so I welcome our new Zombie overlords.

There's plenty of other ways to achieve a death like that though. In fact with a little creativity and adequate advance warning you could incorporate it into almost any death. Consider it a challenge.

WebDudette
03-20-2009, 01:40 AM
Load up my shotguns and make my way with a couple other people to the sporting goods store by my house. It's huge and it has two floors. Weapons galore and a lot of non-perishable food items. There is a Costco and an In-N-Out in the same parking lot just in case.

Plus, it's two stories, so I destroy the stairs and their only way up is to pile on top of each other.

Though, it has crossed my mind that being stationary wouldn't be such a good idea. My other plan is make it to the lake asap and get a boat out on the water with some canned food and wait for the army to do its job.

edit: There is always the chance that I am one of the first infected. In that case I can only hope to be one of the first generation super zombies. In which case, most of the others would be my minions.

jacknife737
03-20-2009, 02:03 AM
Anyways, i'd probably end up the dude, who gets bitten fairly early on, but it's only on the calf or something, so it'll take a while to infect me. I'd then more then likely go on to infect my survivor buddies.


I wasn't aware that this was a realistic topic.

You dick.

It was an amusing picture, semi-relevant to the discussion. Chill out, brah.

Outerspaceman21
03-20-2009, 08:02 AM
The original is complete crap unless it is supposed to be funny, and I seem to remember Romero saying that it was not intended to be funny. So it's just crap.

The remake was a nearly perfect example of what a zombie movie should be, and just a generally good movie. Good directing, decent acting, decent story, great music, great make-up and effects, good dialogue...seriously, what's not to like?

Dude, the original rocked. It's like my all time favorite movie. The remake was in no way a comparison or even better. The zombies were all wrong and it never concentrated on american consumerism like the original did.

Plus, what do you expect from a 1970's horror B-movie? SUPERIOR EFFECTS AND SPOT ON ACTING?

wheelchairman
03-20-2009, 08:32 AM
Back on topic.

Yes I would survive the Zombie Apocalypse. I would go over to my friend Phil and kill him, lock myself in my apartment and live off of his fat for the month or so it would take to get help out of the country.

Grimesy da Offspringfan
03-20-2009, 08:40 AM
Everyone else is doing it.

wuss...this is how "popular" culture works

wheelchairman
03-20-2009, 08:41 AM
Your name indicates to me that you are about as close to a zombie as the human race can get.

Grimesy da Offspringfan
03-20-2009, 08:58 AM
Your name indicates to me that you are about as close to a zombie as the human race can get.
i think more like i was stoned when i registrated here, but yeah, kinda zombielike..wich means tha apocalypse thing has already started, and i'm the first to be infected

khaaaaan
03-20-2009, 09:04 AM
Back on topic.

Yes I would survive the Zombie Apocalypse. I would go over to my friend Phil and kill him, lock myself in my apartment and live off of his fat for the month or so it would take to get help out of the country.

Dude... not cool.

But yes, I too would survive. I've been spending my entire life preparing myself for the Zombie Apocalypse. Resident Evil series, Left 4 Dead, Romero's "of the Dead" series, 28 days-/ weeks later and so on. I think today's youth is more prepared then ever before.

Also, here's a little template to help you plan how you'll survive:

http://i126.photobucket.com/albums/p93/phijen/zombietools.jpg

wheelchairman
03-20-2009, 09:43 AM
Well to be fair, two months ago my plan was that you and me would team up to kill Rune. It's nothing personal.

khaaaaan
03-20-2009, 10:06 AM
Rune called me today and woke me up. He told me that he's quitting the military after these four months. He's to big for it he says :P Plus he feels that he's seeing the world differently now or something.

Rooster
03-20-2009, 10:13 AM
So, when i get infected, i'd better have to stay the hell out of your way guys, because otherwise i'd get my zombie ass kicked...

wheelchairman
03-20-2009, 10:39 AM
Rune called me today and woke me up. He told me that he's quitting the military after these four months. He's to big for it he says :P Plus he feels that he's seeing the world differently now or something.

Well yeah I guess he is feeling pretty nervous about shooting curry kids.

khaaaaan
03-20-2009, 10:49 AM
Yeah, what a dumbass.

Here's mine btw:
http://i126.photobucket.com/albums/p93/phijen/zombietools-1.jpg

wheelchairman
03-20-2009, 11:06 AM
Chevy's, giggity.

wheelchairman
03-20-2009, 01:14 PM
and now my zombie tools.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v220/wheelchairman/zombietoolsper.jpg

khaaaaan
03-20-2009, 02:54 PM
and now my zombie tools.

I like your last words. But I'm a bit unsure wether to go with the Duke Nukem reference or "There's to many of them!".

Jebus
03-20-2009, 05:33 PM
http://i40.tinypic.com/10mrjx5.jpg

Budzy
03-20-2009, 08:51 PM
Awesome thread!

My Zombie Tools:
http://i299.photobucket.com/albums/mm298/Budzy485/ZOMBIETOOLS.jpg

My CoD skills would keep me alive.

0r4ng3
03-20-2009, 09:45 PM
This took me way longer than it should have.

http://i16.photobucket.com/albums/b38/0r4ng3/zombietools.jpg

(location and stronghold are practically the same thing anyway)

Edit: Actually the Power Armor's not so great. My Ranger Battle Armor actually prevents more damage and gives me a crazy good Small Guns skill bonus. But whatever, this joke has been explained too much already.

Rag Doll
03-20-2009, 09:46 PM
i admit, bipolar bear's tags amused me quite a bit. i played a monkees slot machine last night and it was enjoyable.

anyway, back on topic. i think a diner would be a fantastic place to go. there is plenty of food and usually you can shut the blinds and no one would know you are there. i think it would be decently safe. the only that would suck is the large amount of old people. though, i suppose you could just push them at the zombies first...

Outerspaceman21
03-20-2009, 10:31 PM
Well, heres mine

http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm42/Outerspaceman21/zombietools.jpg

0r4ng3
03-20-2009, 10:46 PM
"I'm not a zombie asshole! Eat what I want! Eat what I feel like! Don't give a fuck if it's brains enough for you! 'Cause I'm not alive!"

nieh
03-20-2009, 10:59 PM
http://img9.imageshack.us/img9/8122/zombietools2.jpg
Robots are immune to zombies, right?

Jebus
03-20-2009, 11:37 PM
You cheated. I'm telling mom.

nieh
03-20-2009, 11:43 PM
To whoever it was that picked the stormtrooper armor, wtf were you thinking? (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ym-xHehd4NI)

WebDudette
03-21-2009, 02:16 AM
Fuck you nieh, though my secondary would also be a cricket bat. You can't use use a death star you fucking cheater.

Outerspaceman21
03-21-2009, 10:15 AM
To whoever it was that picked the stormtrooper armor, wtf were you thinking? (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ym-xHehd4NI)

First, Thats a great video. Second, I don't think zombies will have blasters and they can't eat through the armor... I don't they can...

Rooster
03-21-2009, 01:28 PM
I just got bitten... Now i have to run before all you alive people can catch me and kick my zombie ass...

Mota Boy
03-21-2009, 02:31 PM
Because honestly, I don't see myself making it out uneaten.I was so certain that I'd made a "Thought of the Day" about this that I spent twenty minutes searching every conceivable word I could have used, to no avail. But it's a thought I've often had - turned the survival aspect of my brain into dealing with the strangest of scenarios.

After living in a place for a couple months, I have normally figured out exactly what I'd use if the Russian mafia were to come after me, exactly how I'd barricade myself in for the zombie apocalypse, my plans for hiding out given an alien invasion and just how I'd manage to dispose of a body, were it to come my way.

Meanwhile, I just realized I have yet to conceive of the possibility of a fire, and every time I think of an earthquake, it's of me being fucked from the get-go.

nieh
03-21-2009, 03:17 PM
You cheated. I'm telling mom.


Fuck you nieh, though my secondary would also be a cricket bat. You can't use use a death star you fucking cheater.

Nuh uh! There's no rules against using the Death Star. Besides, 0r4ng3 used an arwing, pokemon and stuff from Futurama, why don't you accuse him of cheating too!?

T-6005
03-21-2009, 03:32 PM
I was so certain that I'd made a "Thought of the Day" about this that I spent twenty minutes searching every conceivable word I could have used, to no avail. But it's a thought I've often had - turned the survival aspect of my brain into dealing with the strangest of scenarios.

After living in a place for a couple months, I have normally figured out exactly what I'd use if the Russian mafia were to come after me, exactly how I'd barricade myself in for the zombie apocalypse, my plans for hiding out given an alien invasion and just how I'd manage to dispose of a body, were it to come my way.

Meanwhile, I just realized I have yet to conceive of the possibility of a fire, and every time I think of an earthquake, it's of me being fucked from the get-go.

See, standard disasters I've often thought about. Standard practice for large earthquakes has imprinted itself into my brain after eleven years on the ring of fire, so I'm not too worried.

Things like tsunamis are a little more complicated because really, if you're just in the wrong place you're pretty much certain to die.

But your general things like typhoons and getting sucked out to sea by riptides I can see myself dealing with. It's why I picked the zombie apocalypse - I just can't conceive of what I'd do if a zombie busted down my door. Would I run to the kitchen to arm myself with a knife? Attempt to make it out the window, jumping over the back wall and then head for the convenience store around the corner that just happens to have bars on all the doors and windows? Or would I just stand there, uncomprehending and half-expecting it to be revealed as a practical joke even as infect zombie teeth tore my grey matter out of my head?

Jebus
03-21-2009, 03:47 PM
Nuh uh! There's no rules against using the Death Star. Besides, 0r4ng3 used an arwing, pokemon and stuff from Futurama, why don't you accuse him of cheating too!?
There's an obvious point where you cross the line. Mostly, I just think you're being a big of a selfish dickwad destroying planet earth with the rest of us on there still trying to fight the good fight. Way to take the easy way out instead of thinking about the rest of the few thousands remaining souls, who would like to have their home planet intact. Jerk.

0r4ng3
03-21-2009, 03:51 PM
Way to take the easy way out instead of thinking about the rest of the few thousands remaining souls, who would like to have their home planet intact. Jerk.
I dunno, if he invited me to live on said Death Star, I wouldn't mind if my home planet was no longer intact.

Besides, the Arwing is totally cheating. They can do barrel rolls, for crying out loud! I would've picked the Wings of Time, but do you know how difficult it is to find Chrono Trigger pictures online? Turns out it's "very".

Jebus
03-21-2009, 03:54 PM
That's because you're a spineless traitor. Mother earth weeps. :(

nightvision
03-21-2009, 03:59 PM
Since I can't even play Silent Hill on my Xbox without screaming in horror and taking breaks every 5 minutes I don't think I'd handle myself very good in a situation like that. So no, I wouldn't stand a chance since I'd be too afraid to even breathe.

nieh
03-21-2009, 04:15 PM
There's an obvious point where you cross the line. Mostly, I just think you're being a big of a selfish dickwad destroying planet earth with the rest of us on there still trying to fight the good fight. Way to take the easy way out instead of thinking about the rest of the few thousands remaining souls, who would like to have their home planet intact. Jerk.

I think you guys are just jealous that I thought of it first.

T-6005
03-21-2009, 05:24 PM
http://i32.photobucket.com/albums/d3/thibaultk/zombietools.jpg
Note - Ryu is not my sidekick. He is my primary weapon.

0r4ng3
03-21-2009, 05:30 PM
One of my first ideas was to put Iron Man in every category. It's crazy because theoretically it would all make sense.

WebDudette
03-21-2009, 05:32 PM
You know what is scarier then a zombie invasion?

A raptor attack, they really can open doors.

edit; oh fuck, zombies on raptors.

T-6005
03-21-2009, 05:45 PM
We're one step from writing a B-movie plot about zombie raptors who overrun Avengers tower.

I hear Marvel's trying for big budget movies more these days, though.

nieh
03-21-2009, 05:46 PM
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/e/ed/MZTPB.jpg

Jebus
03-21-2009, 05:50 PM
You know what is scarier then a zombie invasion?

A raptor attack, they really can open doors.

edit; oh fuck, zombies on raptors.
Basically, WoW.
http://img147.imageshack.us/img147/1210/avatarss2.png
EDIT: Marvel Zombies is pretty good.

T-6005
03-21-2009, 05:58 PM
Marvel Zombies was meh. Needed more raptors.

Rooster
03-21-2009, 06:04 PM
I'm raptor, and i was bitten a while ago, so the infection has already spread. I guess i'm a zombie-raptor now

edit: don't let my avatar picture fool you, that was just a random dude i ate after taking a photo of my meal. this is real me:

http://www.emerson.k12.nj.us/staff/rmkelly/custom/DinosaurWQ/Images/Velociraptor/velociraptor1.gif

Rooster
03-21-2009, 06:12 PM
No one can stop us.

http://img130.imageshack.us/img130/8263/italyraptorca8.jpg

Seriously.

nieh
03-21-2009, 06:13 PM
Marvel Zombies was meh. Needed more raptors.

Iron Man wasn't able to avoid becoming a zombie though.

T-6005
03-21-2009, 08:47 PM
He didn't have Ryu, the Terminator, or a Lightsaber.

I strongly believe that if he had had any or all of these things, that Iron man would have killed all of the zombies, and then the Silver Surfer and Galactus when they came along.

Mota Boy
03-21-2009, 10:26 PM
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/e/ed/MZTPB.jpgPsh, what total garbage. Cyclops' body is still walking around with a detached head? Whoever wrote that has obviously never seen real zombies.

wheelchairman
03-22-2009, 03:59 AM
It annoys me that people aren't answering the zombie tools thing seriously.

Unless of course Thi believes that Ryu is real and is a tool.

Offspring-Junkie
03-22-2009, 06:28 AM
http://i295.photobucket.com/albums/mm146/offspring-junkie/apocalypse.jpg?t=1237724855

Rooster
03-22-2009, 07:38 AM
http://www.offspring.com/forums/picture.php?albumid=250&pictureid=2904

nieh
03-22-2009, 07:40 AM
It annoys me that people aren't answering the zombie tools thing seriously.

Unless of course Thi believes that Ryu is real and is a tool.

You used Kirk as a sidekick!

Rag Doll
03-22-2009, 09:33 AM
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v257/tragicxromantic/zombietools.jpg

this is all stuff we could reasonably access without much travel needed.

T-6005
03-22-2009, 10:30 AM
It annoys me that people aren't answering the zombie tools thing seriously.

Unless of course Thi believes that Ryu is real and is a tool.


It's why I picked the zombie apocalypse - I just can't conceive of what I'd do if a zombie busted down my door. Would I run to the kitchen to arm myself with a knife? Attempt to make it out the window, jumping over the back wall and then head for the convenience store around the corner that just happens to have bars on all the doors and windows? Or would I just stand there, uncomprehending and half-expecting it to be revealed as a practical joke even as infected zombie teeth tore my grey matter out of my head?


Because honestly, I don't see myself making it out uneaten.

I thought it was clear that I have no expectation of actually surviving the zombie apocalypse unless I have these tools at my disposal.

Jules69
03-22-2009, 10:40 AM
You mean like the movie Land Of The Dead!!? That would be hard to survive!!! You would need lots of guns an amo!!!!

Outerspaceman21
03-22-2009, 11:35 AM
It annoys me that people aren't answering the zombie tools thing seriously.

Unless of course Thi believes that Ryu is real and is a tool.

Well, realistically, I would use this aluminum bat I have along with some other blunt and sharp objects, my truck, my attic as a stronghold and I would probably be solo. As for my last words, they would stay the same.

wheelchairman
03-22-2009, 12:20 PM
Captain Kirk is real:
http://memory-alpha.org/en/wiki/James_T._Kirk

See the word wiki is in that link.

Rooster
03-22-2009, 12:34 PM
See the word wiki is in that link.

Now i have absolutely no doubt in the existance of the corporeal Capitan Kirk.