PDA

View Full Version : Thought



IamSam
01-28-2010, 09:34 PM
What if there was someone in your midst that was so diabolically clever, so spectacularly smart, and so incredibly ingenuitive that they hid who they really were for an extended period of time while you spent vast quantities of time around them? What if this person had become your friend? Would you like to know that they were not who they said they were? Would you be hurt or would you stand in awe when it was revealed that they were not who they said they were?

I'm just curious as I've been looking into the witness protection program.

SweetTatyana
01-28-2010, 09:39 PM
My reaction would come down to the person's reasoning to do so. If it was witness protection program then obviously no but if it was for no reason or to just be malicious then screw um, right?

It might also depend on the type of relationship they tried to pursue with me. If someone became romantically involved with me to a point where very deep feelings developed, I don't think thats fair no matter what the pretenses are.

WebDudette
01-28-2010, 09:53 PM
I would... both. I'd definitely be hurt, one thing I really hate is dishonest and fake people. I fucking loathe that, if you hate me that is cool, but don't pretend to like me. But I'd also be surprised, I'd be impressed that I didn't see through it and that they could keep it up for so long and so convincingly.

This brings up something I've been meaning to talk about, intentions or actions? Which is more important, what do you judge people by more?

RageAndLov
01-29-2010, 12:03 AM
Isn't there an Offspring song about this? Ah! Never Gonna Find Me.

Lizardus
01-29-2010, 12:37 AM
I will find you one of these days, Waldo.

Harleyquiiinn
01-29-2010, 12:53 AM
Basically, you wonder how you would feel if you were Los Lane ?

Paint_It_Black
01-29-2010, 03:38 AM
I suppose I'd be a little impressed. Though honestly I don't think it's that difficult to do. I doubt I'd be particularly hurt in any way, though it would depend on the nature of my relationship I suppose.



This brings up something I've been meaning to talk about, intentions or actions? Which is more important, what do you judge people by more?

Actions. Road to hell and all that. Actions are what count. Intentions are the excuses when actions have bad results.

I've been let down too many times by people who then say "it's not my fault! I intended to do (insert whatever minor favor they had promised to do) but (insert lame excuse)!"

That shit is ok occasionally. But generally, results are what matter.

SweetTatyana
01-29-2010, 08:22 AM
Basically, you wonder how you would feel if you were Los Lane ?

I would just be relieved he's not actually faster than a speeding bullet.. in all ways

Harleyquiiinn
01-29-2010, 08:27 AM
I would just be relieved he's not actually faster than a speeding bullet.. in all ways

Ooh that was a good one :D

IamSam
01-29-2010, 11:20 AM
This brings up something I've been meaning to talk about, intentions or actions? Which is more important, what do you judge people by more?

Actions. There are some who don't think about the intentions which then makes the actions speak even louder because they didn't think at all about how it would affect the others around them.

WebDudette
01-29-2010, 05:06 PM
But, if someone does something with all the wrong intentions, even if the action benefits you in someway, is that just as fucked up, if not more?

I suppose I'm just really uncomfortable with not knowing peoples true nature and intentions.

IamSam
01-29-2010, 08:58 PM
Yes, it is. Just because I am a beneficiary of their maleficence doesn't mean that I will approve of their methods of doing so.

Peoples intentions can hurt no matter what they are. Because of this, I like thinking of a saying from one of my favorite fictional characters:

"...people aren't chocolates. D'you know what they are mostly? Bastards. Bastard-coated bastards with bastard filling." - Dr. Cox

WebDudette
01-29-2010, 09:22 PM
Wait, are we on the same page here? I think intentions are more important and something a person should really be judged by.

Though, I suppose it is highly dependent on the situation.

Paint_It_Black
01-30-2010, 12:33 AM
I suppose I'm just really uncomfortable with not knowing peoples true nature and intentions.

You can never really know. This is part of why I have to conclude that actions are more important.


I think intentions are more important and something a person should really be judged by.

Have you ever been close to someone who always has good intentions but always lets you down anyway?

I used to believe intentions were important. Experience changed my mind.

IamSam
01-30-2010, 07:44 AM
Have you ever been close to someone who always has good intentions but always lets you down anyway?

I used to believe intentions were important. Experience changed my mind.

This part. There are some people that have a good heart and do things with what they think are good intentions, but those good intentions are only 'good' for them and therefore those good intentions have unintended consequences to those around them.

jacknife737
01-30-2010, 08:28 AM
I think i'd be pretty impressed.. i mean as long as the person didn't reveal themselves to be like some nazi-war criminal hiding from interpole or whaterver.

It would take some serious dedication to be "in character" for such a long time.

IamSam
01-30-2010, 09:39 PM
Let's throw a different scenario out there:

Instead of witness protection, the person is a psych/sociopath. They have an inability to show emotions other than projecting those that they see from others. They can manipulate nearly anybody.

What if you found out a loved one was a sociopath?

Al Coholic
01-30-2010, 09:43 PM
Well, atleast it would make for an interesting episode of House.

IamSam
01-30-2010, 09:47 PM
Well, atleast it would make for an interesting episode of House.

Yadda yadda yadda.

Barring that-

WebDudette
01-30-2010, 09:54 PM
That is what I had originally thought you were talking about, that is why I asked about intentions vs. actions.

PedroACastro
01-30-2010, 10:03 PM
Let's throw a different scenario out there:

Instead of witness protection, the person is a psych/sociopath. They have an inability to show emotions other than projecting those that they see from others. They can manipulate nearly anybody.

What if you found out a loved one was a sociopath?

http://replayray.files.wordpress.com/2009/06/dexter_morgan1.jpg

Al Coholic
01-31-2010, 12:31 AM
What if there was someone in your midst that was so diabolically clever, so spectacularly smart, and so incredibly ingenuitive that they hid who they really were for an extended period of time while you spent vast quantities of time around them? What if this person had become your friend? Would you like to know that they were not who they said they were? Would you be hurt or would you stand in awe when it was revealed that they were not who they said they were?

How many people do you really know like this. You'd think they'd make unconcious hints and do things to give themselves away. I mean sooner or later you gotta drop the facade before you go crazy, or just become your alterego... ya'll know what I mean? Sooner or later you'd realise it, Iamsam. and I for one know I would catch on. Besides, after a while that alterego will become part of who you are Not the same thing, but still part of you as a person.

Paint_It_Black
01-31-2010, 01:21 AM
^^ I don't get it.



What if you found out a loved one was a sociopath?

It depends. Many people are sociopaths, actually I think it's just called antisocial personality disorder now. I know at least one person who is clearly this way, and he's actually finally on his way to prison for a considerable stretch. I've known for years that prison would be his destiny. To me his disorder was obvious. Though apparently he was great at deceiving many people. Maybe he just never bothered to try deceiving me much, I don't know.

They can't help being the way they are, so no, it would not bother me. Now, if you mean a sociopath as in someone like a serial killer, well, it would suck that they are what they are, but I still wouldn't be bothered that they deceived me. Deception would be essential for their survival. The only thing that would bother me is that I didn't spot it, because I like to think I'm rather good at seeing through the bullshit and figuring out who people really are. How they think and what motivates them. All that good stuff. I'd be disappointed in myself if I failed at that.

But really this scenario you have presented doesn't differ much from the last one. You have a person who needs to keep a secret for their own good, and you're asking if we'd be bothered that they hid it from us. Well no, I generally would not be upset that someone kept something from me if it is clearly important to keep it a secret.

Al Coholic
01-31-2010, 01:36 AM
^^ I don't get it.

Well if I just spell it out it's no fun is it?

Paint_It_Black
01-31-2010, 03:04 AM
No, I mean, everyone knows now that you are Sidewinder, not IamSam. You don't need to pretend anymore.

IamSam
01-31-2010, 07:45 AM
How many people do you really know like this. You'd think they'd make unconcious hints and do things to give themselves away. I mean sooner or later you gotta drop the facade before you go crazy, or just become your alterego... ya'll know what I mean? Sooner or later you'd realise it, Iamsam. and I for one know I would catch on. Besides, after a while that alterego will become part of who you are Not the same thing, but still part of you as a person.

For your viewing pleasure. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jT3_UCm1A5I)




It depends. Many people are sociopaths, actually I think it's just called antisocial personality disorder now. I know at least one person who is clearly this way, and he's actually finally on his way to prison for a considerable stretch. I've known for years that prison would be his destiny. To me his disorder was obvious. Though apparently he was great at deceiving many people. Maybe he just never bothered to try deceiving me much, I don't know.

They can't help being the way they are, so no, it would not bother me. Now, if you mean a sociopath as in someone like a serial killer, well, it would suck that they are what they are, but I still wouldn't be bothered that they deceived me. Deception would be essential for their survival. The only thing that would bother me is that I didn't spot it, because I like to think I'm rather good at seeing through the bullshit and figuring out who people really are. How they think and what motivates them. All that good stuff. I'd be disappointed in myself if I failed at that.

But really this scenario you have presented doesn't differ much from the last one. You have a person who needs to keep a secret for their own good, and you're asking if we'd be bothered that they hid it from us. Well no, I generally would not be upset that someone kept something from me if it is clearly important to keep it a secret.

Well yes, if the person were a serial killer that would cause significant problems. Like you, I pride myself in being able to read people and figure out their secrets. However, this differs from my first scenario in this way: What motivates a sociopath? What would their intentions be?

Paint_It_Black
01-31-2010, 09:54 AM
What motivates a sociopath? What would their intentions be?

Personal gain, I would assume, of whatever form they prefer. But I'm not sure it matters too much in this hypothetical scenario. A sociopath really can't help being a sociopath. And for obvious reasons it would be beneficial to hide it from as many people as possible. So I still wouldn't be hurt or offended if someone I was close to was keeping this from me. I'd have many concerns once I found out, but having my feelings hurt would not be one of them.

IamSam
02-01-2010, 01:51 PM
How many people do you really know like this. You'd think they'd make unconcious hints and do things to give themselves away. I mean sooner or later you gotta drop the facade before you go crazy, or just become your alterego... ya'll know what I mean? Sooner or later you'd realise it, Iamsam. and I for one know I would catch on. Besides, after a while that alterego will become part of who you are Not the same thing, but still part of you as a person.

I have no idea what you are talking about ؟

Llamas
02-01-2010, 01:56 PM
I haven't posted here yet because I wanted to mull it over a bit. My main thought about this topic is that, because I have a really hard time with trust. I think if it was for the witness protection program, I'd be okay with it unless it was a relationship. I'd be extremely hurt if I was in a serious relationship and found it out - definitely not impressed.

But unless the person's life was at risk or something pretty substantial like that, I'd be upset and would probably not be able to trust them ever again... :-/