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Lizardus
01-29-2010, 08:08 PM
http://img715.imageshack.us/img715/504/halflife22.th.jpg (http://img715.imageshack.us/i/halflife22.jpg/)

Today in physics class, I was pulled out of class by Dr. Vance, I was then ordered to open my locker which was then searched.

Then they took me to Dr. Breen's office where I was searched as was my backpack, then I was asked questions like "Are you now, or have you ever been in the possession of a crowbar" I said no then after answering all of there questions I was sent back to my Anomalous materials class.

I then went to Biology and was later pulled out again by Dr. Vance. He asked me to get my things and my H.E.V. suit. We went into his office and he said I was a "person of interest" and that Student Protection wanted to question me, but Student Protection could either question me at the school or at the Nova Prospect, and Student Protection chose Nova Prospect.

We walked down to the end of the hallway and the Student Protection was waiting for me. He then, in the middle of the hallway, searched me, suspended me in mid air and lead me outside to the squad car.

When we got to Nova Prospect he put me in a questioning room, took all my belongings and left.

When he came back he started asking me questions like "Who did you get it from" and such. I had no idea what he was talking about then he said "I know you sold him the dark matter." Someone had told him that I sold him dark matter after he had gotten caught. He said I had sold him dark matter in the parking lot of The Citadel the past Tuesday after school.

There was only one thing wrong with his story, I had taken an airboat to Black Mesa East, and was home the whole time. This is the second time I've been searched without anything to be found.

The thing that bugs me the most is that instead of questioning me at school he chose to search me, suspend me in mid air and arrest me in the middle of the school day, in the middle of a hallway, with no notification to my parents or any evidence to prove it.

The he made me pick up a can.

My Half-Life is average.

Jules69
01-29-2010, 08:09 PM
Man you should be famous!! Classic!!:D

Thomas
01-29-2010, 09:53 PM
<3<3<3<3<3<3<3

T-6005
01-29-2010, 11:46 PM
So close, but at "The Citadel's parking lot" I balked a little.

Paint_It_Black
01-30-2010, 01:41 AM
This thread just barely misses perfection because there are no tags.

I guess Lizardus can't do EVERYTHING for us.

Llamas
01-30-2010, 01:52 AM
I googled to find out what this is in reference to. I've never even heard of Half Life 2. Amusing either way, though.

ad8
01-30-2010, 04:04 AM
I don't know what to say except

<3<3<3<3<3<3<3

Harleyquiiinn
01-30-2010, 04:06 AM
The nerd in me is very happy right now.

Paint_It_Black
01-30-2010, 06:19 AM
I want to be the nerd in you.

AD90
01-30-2010, 06:26 AM
I believed it up until the last line of "My Half-Life is average".

Then I knew they were taking the piss. Had me intrigued the whole time, though. Heh.

Actually the Dark Matter part sort of got me, along with the picture.

Guess I'm just too gullible.

Harleyquiiinn
01-30-2010, 07:05 AM
I want to be the nerd in you.

Dear Paint_It_Black,

Thank you for your interest in our position.

The position you applied for, however, has already been filled. We will keep your application on file and contact you should an appropriate position come up.

We appreciate your interest and wish you the best for your future.


Sincerely,

Harleyquiiinn

:)

jacknife737
01-30-2010, 07:10 AM
So good. 10 characters

Paint_It_Black
01-30-2010, 07:22 AM
Don't you hate it when you come up with something brilliantly witty but realize it's just too creepy/gross to actually say?

:(

Harleyquiiinn
01-30-2010, 07:25 AM
Don't you hate it when you come up with something brilliantly witty but realize it's just too creepy/gross to actually say?

:(

Well, I don't really know what you mean, but your joke was good. And I would never have realized that the words used in a rejection letter are kind of dirty... that or really, I have a too sexual way of thinking.

AD90
01-30-2010, 07:29 AM
I think it was
The position you applied for, however, has already been filled.

Thomas
01-30-2010, 07:46 AM
Jesus Christ, this thread keeps getting better...



I googled to find out what this is in reference to. I've never even heard of Half Life 2. Amusing either way, though.

I'm deleting you from my facebook friends list. h8 2 u. :mad::mad::mad:

nieh
01-30-2010, 08:32 AM
I love this thread.
p.s. you beat google. (http://www.google.com/search?q=%22my+half-life+is+average%22&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8&aq=t&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&client=firefox-a)

Llamas
01-30-2010, 10:39 AM
I'm deleting you from my facebook friends list. h8 2 u. :mad::mad::mad:
:( I just don't like first person shooters. Or playing games on my computer. I'M SORRYYYYYY!!!

Superdope
01-30-2010, 12:12 PM
Lizardus wins again.

Free?
01-30-2010, 01:31 PM
Lizardus wins again.

No shit, Gordon.

7Seconds
01-30-2010, 01:45 PM
http://img715.imageshack.us/img715/504/halflife22.th.jpg (http://img715.imageshack.us/i/halflife22.jpg/)

Today in physics class, I was pulled out of class by Dr. Vance, I was then ordered to open my locker which was then searched.

Then they took me to Dr. Breen's office where I was searched as was my backpack, then I was asked questions like "Are you now, or have you ever been in the possession of a crowbar" I said no then after answering all of there questions I was sent back to my Anomalous materials class.

I then went to Biology and was later pulled out again by Dr. Vance. He asked me to get my things and my H.E.V. suit. We went into his office and he said I was a "person of interest" and that Student Protection wanted to question me, but Student Protection could either question me at the school or at the Nova Prospect, and Student Protection chose Nova Prospect.

We walked down to the end of the hallway and the Student Protection was waiting for me. He then, in the middle of the hallway, searched me, suspended me in mid air and lead me outside to the squad car.

When we got to Nova Prospect he put me in a questioning room, took all my belongings and left.

When he came back he started asking me questions like "Who did you get it from" and such. I had no idea what he was talking about then he said "I know you sold him the dark matter." Someone had told him that I sold him dark matter after he had gotten caught. He said I had sold him dark matter in the parking lot of The Citadel the past Tuesday after school.

There was only one thing wrong with his story, I had taken an airboat to Black Mesa East, and was home the whole time. This is the second time I've been searched without anything to be found.

The thing that bugs me the most is that instead of questioning me at school he chose to search me, suspend me in mid air and arrest me in the middle of the school day, in the middle of a hallway, with no notification to my parents or any evidence to prove it.

The he made me pick up a can.

My Half-Life is average.

Are you making fun of me?

Lizardus
01-30-2010, 02:05 PM
I just came back from replacing all the liquid in my body with Neapolitan ice cream.
I feel dizzy and a side of my brain hurts, but i also feel delicious.

WHO WANTS A PIECE OF ME?!


Are you making fun of me?

No, i'm laughing at you, it's different.

7Seconds
01-30-2010, 02:11 PM
I just came back from replacing all the liquid in my body with Neapolitan ice cream.
I feel dizzy and a side of my brain hurts, but i also feel delicious.

WHO WANTS A PIECE OF ME?!



No, i'm laughing at you, it's different.

Ass hole. 10

SweetTatyana
01-30-2010, 02:16 PM
Lizardus quickly validates why he won funniest member.