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Annoying
02-27-2005, 10:22 AM
Obedient Wife

There was a man who had worked all of his life, had saved all of his money,
and was a real miser when it came to his money. Just before he died, he
said to his wife, "When I die, I want you to take all my money and put it in the casket with me. I want to take my money to the afterlife with me."

And so he got his wife to promise him with all of her heart that when he
died, she would put all of the money in the casket with him.

Well, he died. He was stretched out in the casket, his wife was sitting
there in black, and her friend was sitting next to her.

When they finished the ceremony, just before the undertakers got ready to
close the casket, the wife said, "Wait just a minute!"

She had a box with her, she came over with the box and put it in the
casket.

Then the undertakers locked the casket down, and they rolled it away.

So her friend said, "Girl, I know you weren't fool enough to put all that
money in there with your husband."

The loyal wife replied," Listen, I'm a Christian, I can't go back on my
word. I promised him that I was going to put that money in that casket with
him."

You mean to tell me you put that money in the casket with him!!!!?"

"I sure did," said the wife. "I got it all together, put it into my account
and wrote him a check. If he can cash it, he can spend it."

Trip Boy
02-27-2005, 10:22 AM
Sounds like something a female would do.

JoY
02-27-2005, 10:28 AM
I think it's pretty fucking brilliant. I mean, in case there's no god, or he'll end up in an afterlife, where he can't spend earthly money, she still will always have it. still she lived up to her promiss. perfect.

Trip Boy
02-27-2005, 10:29 AM
Just like girls are, misleading, hypocritical snatches

Sunny
02-27-2005, 10:31 AM
haha, awesome. ::applauds the wife::

JoY
02-27-2005, 10:37 AM
Just like girls are, misleading, hypocritical snatches
what's wrong, darling. IF he'd could spend earthly money in afterlife, he could write a check aswel, right? & with a check, he could cash it, right? so she kept her promiss, right? so what the fuck is wrong?

Trip Boy
02-27-2005, 10:38 AM
what's wrong, darling. IF he'd need the money in afterlife, he could cash it, right? so she kept her promiss, right? so what the fuck is wrong?

You know damn well that wasn't the way he wanted it, she was misleading. If you can't see this then you are just like the rest of them.

JoY
02-27-2005, 10:39 AM
You know damn well that wasn't the way he wanted it, she was misleading. If you can't see this then you are just like the rest of them.
oh NO, I must be female then.

Trip Boy
02-27-2005, 10:39 AM
You're so airheaded it's not funny.

JoY
02-27-2005, 10:41 AM
You're so airheaded it's not funny.
*cracks up*
I can't believe how funny it is, that you should say this to -me-.

Sunny
02-27-2005, 11:03 AM
You know damn well that wasn't the way he wanted it, she was misleading. If you can't see this then you are just like the rest of them.

misleading? not at all. as Bella said... he wanted to have all of his money with him in the AFTERLIFE. Surely if he could BUY stuff in heaven/hell, he would find a bank to cash his check too.
Had he found money useful in the afterlife, he would have cashed it.

Trip Boy
02-27-2005, 11:05 AM
SLAP :cool:

Sunny
02-27-2005, 11:08 AM
yes, a verbal slap. bitchslap, even. from me to you. =)

Trip Boy
02-27-2005, 11:10 AM
Whatever makes you sleep better at night sunny.

the_GoDdEsS
02-27-2005, 11:18 AM
*cracks up*
I can't believe how funny it is, that you should say this to -me-.
Haha, I couldn't believe it either. I had to read it two times and really look if it was him who said that. Hahaha, wtf?

JoY
02-27-2005, 11:28 AM
it must've been a misunderstanding. I think Mags cleared it up now.

*after-giggle*

RXP
02-27-2005, 11:29 AM
"I sure did," said the wife. "I got it all together, put it into my account
and wrote him a check. If he can cash it, he can spend it."

Typical woman. Clearly a whore. When she's on her back the meter is running. She should be raped.

Also it's typical for the women here to think it's funny. Unless she gave him a banker's gurantee cheque she broke her promise because the funds won't clear all the time. Women get away with too much. Rape is justice.

Trip Boy
02-27-2005, 11:30 AM
^ Agreed....

JoY
02-27-2005, 11:35 AM
Typical woman. Clearly a whore. When she's on her back the meter is running. She should be raped.

Also it's typical for the women here to think it's funny. Unless she gave him a banker's gurantee cheque she broke her promise because the funds won't clear all the time. Women get away with too much. Rape is justice.
you really need to put a FUCKING sock in it now.

Trip Boy
02-27-2005, 11:43 AM
you really need to put a FUCKING sock in it now.

Sluts tend to get offensive when other sluts are spoken about badly.

Linda
02-27-2005, 12:09 PM
That was one smart woman!
and one stupid man!
:D

Izie
02-27-2005, 12:19 PM
you really need to put a FUCKING sock in it now.

You're gonna get upset over what fake Justin and RXP say on here? Gees Bella, let em do what they want, RXP is usually just faking it, and fake Justin is... Well, fake Justin. What more is there to it?

*huggles Bella*

Relax, think of nice things ;)

the_GoDdEsS
02-27-2005, 12:41 PM
Sluts tend to get offensive when other sluts are spoken about badly.
I'd rape you with a hot wire. VIOLENTLY, arsehole.

RXP
02-27-2005, 02:02 PM
Iz is right, you know I don't mean this stuff. It does piss me off tho when women take the piss out of a guy who "should have seen it coming" in another thread who had his heart broken. Needless to say the comparasons to a woman seing rape coming can be mentioned. NEITHER of them is right or funny. And BOTH are as bad.

Jesus
02-27-2005, 04:07 PM
Ha Ha Ha, that was a fucking lame joke.

HornyPope
02-27-2005, 07:56 PM
Justin Fenton uber alles.

HornyPope
02-27-2005, 08:03 PM
http://molelog.molehill.org/blog/CopyrightCartel/Photography/reichstag.jpg



The Red flag over Reichstag. That was a long favourite of mine among pictures.

Sunny
02-27-2005, 11:19 PM
Sluts tend to get offensive when other sluts are spoken about badly.

I have noticed that sexually frustrated/lonely men tend to call women sluts a lot. Or dirty infested whores, for that matter. Suppose they're bitter or something, and it makes them feel better..

Not making assumptions about you or anything, just pointing out a pattern I noticed.

=p

ninth
02-27-2005, 11:30 PM
I call them broads.

arak0r
02-27-2005, 11:48 PM
why do the majority of jokes told on this board suck?

ninth
02-27-2005, 11:50 PM
why do the majority of jokes told on this board suck?
Simply because the majority of the people on this board suck.

arak0r
02-27-2005, 11:52 PM
true sir

.

ninth
02-28-2005, 12:01 AM
The first time I saw your Orange Whore avatar I actually said "WTF?"

arak0r
02-28-2005, 12:29 AM
hahah i dunno what the hell i was thinking when i made that. creative insanity is fun

JoY
02-28-2005, 06:17 AM
oh darlings, no soap opera. no soap opera at all. even if I had no history at all, rape would pretty much piss me off to no end. I think. yes, I know.
anyway. on top of that information, I was drunk last night. I could've chosen not to react, but because I was silly & slushed I chose to pull my mouth open. I KNOW you weren't serious, but such jokes, even when totally unserious, just aren't funny to.. most girls, I think. they are scaries. rape scares girls. according to tests, that's generally what girls are most afraid of. that's not funny, right?

I think the degrading of women on this board generally already has been enough for at least two more cencuries to come. like Magsle said, it's -mostly- only bitter, lonely, jacking off guys, who say such things, so in the end it degrades everyone & doesn't lift anyone to a higher level.

*cuddles RXP*
you're such a cheesecake.

Tizzalicious
02-28-2005, 09:25 AM
Haha :D I like that.

Sunny
02-28-2005, 10:59 AM
like Magsle said, it's -mostly- only bitter, lonely, jacking off guys, who say such things


also you know what? the only times i've been called a slut in real life was by guys I actually REJECTED, and they got angry, and were like, you fucking slut. Right, I'm a slut alright, cause I didn't want to have sex with them. *rolls eyes*

I suppose they didn't quite see they were insulting themselves, cause hey, if they couldn't get any from a SLUT, then what does it say about them?

the_GoDdEsS
02-28-2005, 01:38 PM
I only claimed all women were dirty infested whores immediately after contracting mono.

I claimed that about men immediately after contracting mono, too.

dirtybird
03-01-2005, 03:36 PM
You would do that..

TrippingOut
03-29-2005, 02:49 PM
Just like girls are, misleading, hypocritical snatches
thats not very nice. not all girls are like that and you shouldnt generalize. plus, the old man was greedy and should have left the money to his family.

TrippingOut
03-29-2005, 02:51 PM
I only claimed all women were dirty infested whores immediately after contracting mono.
Ive never had mono, so not ALL women can be diseased filthy whores.

Trip Boy
03-29-2005, 02:56 PM
Nope, you're wrong.

TrippingOut
03-29-2005, 03:16 PM
ok then....

JohnnyNemesis
03-29-2005, 03:18 PM
I don't think rape should be joked about at all either.

But in my experience, absolutely anything can be said about a man because of the stereotype that men are emotionless, cold pigs, and a woman would be applauded for it. Never works the other way around. Hell, you know those rape jokes would never ever fly anywhere but the Internet, but anything anyone wants to say about men, no matter how bad, is common.

TheUnholyNightbringer
03-29-2005, 07:32 PM
^ Exactly right. Concurs to a theory that I've had for a while.. sexism is no longer sexism. Just female-ism. Never works both ways.

JohnnyNemesis
03-29-2005, 07:34 PM
^Which is sad, because women DO have to put up with a lot of fucked up shit, but it's hard to be sympathetic when I'm being lumped in with a bunch of scumbag assholes, and totally generalized.

TheUnholyNightbringer
03-29-2005, 07:35 PM
Indeed. I'm reminded of a Mortgage company advert, here in the UK, which is "Just for Women." And no one raises an eyebrow. Yet I know if some brave soul were to make a "Just for Men" mortgage company, there would be outrage.