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Thread: DEXTER's JOURNAL by RonWelty

  1. #21
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    Wouldn't it be hilarious if we one day found out that Cock Joke was Dexter all along?

  2. #22
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    Quote Originally Posted by RonWelty View Post
    it«s done, but i think it's not right to put a diary of 5th december on 4th december...
    you're right

    Edit:
    Rutegard - one day, one day..


    Men heap together the mistakes of their lives,
    and create a monster they call destiny.


    [SIGPIC]http://offspring.com/forums/image.php?type=sigpic&userid=17883&dateline=125184 2720[/SIGPIC]

  3. #23
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bipolar Bear View Post
    Wouldn't it be hilarious if we one day found out that Cock Joke was Dexter all along?
    I would be forced to reevaluate my worship of the Offspring if Cock Joke turned out to be Dexter Holland.
    Quote Originally Posted by Little_Miss_1565 View Post
    Or what? Or you'll leave as soon as someone returns your rudeness and delete all your posts? I'm so scared.

  4. #24
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    Because Tomorrow I believe i will be too far away of having the chance to uplead this, i will put DAY 2 live...

    DAY 2 - 5th December

    Well, hello again! It's your Dexter.
    Let's see...

    I woke up early in the morning to do some jogging. Burn some fat, you know what I mean? (russian chicks are hot)
    Morning was wasted on some press interviews. I really hate that piece of SH**. Always the same questions, the same themes. They never ask about "economic crisis" or "how to land an airplane full of drunken music stars when the pilot is stoned too". Nevermind.
    We lunched together and i did not eat mexican food. Kudos for me.
    Noodles bought a Russian Ssh68 helmet. They were used during WWII by russian soldiers. He spent all evening acting goofy with that metal thing in his head. I believe comrades from KGB would prefer to suicide more, than watch that scene. Priceless.
    We went to St.Petersburg for our show. In the past this city was called Leningrad. I rather prefer the new name.
    Our show was what we expected. Hit songs and some newcomers, K. knows how to do a setlist, no doubt about that.
    At the end of the show, Noodles sent out to the crowd some of his own tshirts "ANTI-BUSH" because soon they are useless. Russians really seem to dig it.
    The real standout of this day was after the show.

    We're on backstage, drinking beer and talking shit, when half of red army entered our little room. We were real afraid. I felt some yellowish water running down my leg.
    But we got even more frightned when we found out it was PUTIN who entered the room. He was weird without his classic dark suite. He worn a Anarchy symbol white Tshirt and blue jeans. By the way he seemed heavy stoned, because he was all jumping and screaming: "OH MY GOD DEXTER you're so pretty". We talked about 30 minutes and now I can say He's the nicest guy on Earth.
    He even will send me a new MIG just for me, Isn't he the cutest?

    Well now i'm tired in my room. I will watch some OPRAH to relax a little.

    And now ....

    (RonWeltY: I was listening Dexter on the phone, because i'm not in RUssia and I need him to tell me what to write. After he said "and now" i listened a big weird noise..and the following action is the real true!")

    DEXTER: WHAT THE FUCK!!!

    Noodles: Give me that, man. I want to go home(he yells at me)

    DEXTER: Я сказал вам, глупые глупцы, чтобы лапша сна
    (I told you, stupid fools, to make Noodles sleep)

    RUSSIAN ARMY MAN: Путину не нравятся его волосы. Он предпочел ваши волосы светлее (Putin didn't like his hair. He prefer your brighter hair)

    NOODLES: Dexter man, are you a communist? I'm your fellow mate, dude? You can't trade me for a stupid plane

    DEXTER: They're nice and make me happy...

    (Greg K. Enters the room)

    GREG K. : Stop you two

    Dexter and Noodles: Yes chief

    Greg K. : Dexter we will give Ron fuckin Welty to Putin in trade for you plane . Let's go. I have another babie to make!

    Dexter: Скажите Путину, что я сожалею. Я пошлю Рон Welty ему так что он может сделать собачий стиль с американским парнем (Say to Putin that I'm sorry. I will send Ron Welty to him so he can do doggy style with an american guy)

    RUSSIAN ARMY MAN: Это нормально, Долгая жизнь матери России. Спокойной ночи (That's fine, Long life to mother Russia. Good night)

    Dexter: bye bye

    (dexter again)

    Sorry kids. I have to go back to bed. Daddy Greg always want to act like a father and sing me a story.

    Take care and see you tomorrow
    I am not another The Offspring fan but just THE Offspring FAN !

    Dexter Holland - "Which one of you goes by the screen name of RonWelty?"

  5. #25
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bipolar Bear View Post
    Wouldn't it be hilarious if we one day found out that Cock Joke was Dexter all along?
    or you ....................
    Quote Originally Posted by Free? View Post
    Offspring playing for Free? That would be awesome!
    The Portuguese Chapter:
    Site/Forum/Wiki: www.offspringportugal.com

  6. #26
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    Quote Originally Posted by _Lost_ View Post
    I would be forced to reevaluate my worship of the Offspring if Cock Joke turned out to be Dexter Holland.
    I'd love them even more!

    Quote Originally Posted by Rutegard View Post
    or you ....................
    Haha I wish!

  7. #27
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    Quote Originally Posted by holland25 View Post
    A nun? Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!
    ...beware of killernun, that's right, killernun protect your family, hide the bibles, get the guns...
    reverse reverse holland25!!!

  8. #28
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    RonWelty that was EXCELLENT again!!

  9. #29
    Camilamazed Guest


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    Ron,

    When you write Noodles', please, find a way to include something sex related about Fortaleza. That could be pretty funny. Specially because there wwas a street full of drag queens close to the hotel (if I'm not wrong haaha).

  10. #30
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    Quote Originally Posted by Camilamazed View Post
    Ron,

    When you write Noodles', please, find a way to include something sex related about Fortaleza. That could be pretty funny. Specially because there wwas a street full of drag queens close to the hotel (if I'm not wrong haaha).
    Noodles just phoned me, angry, because he wants to be in the limelight too. So i believe that even during today he will say something to us.
    I am not another The Offspring fan but just THE Offspring FAN !

    Dexter Holland - "Which one of you goes by the screen name of RonWelty?"

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